


Wish upon a well of sorrows

by shiroakuma



Series: Break your Chains [1]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-28
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-03-15 13:30:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 25
Words: 66,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3448940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shiroakuma/pseuds/shiroakuma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was only supposed to give him wisdom but one sip from the well of sorrows and Inquisitor Trevelyan ends up waking up in a world both familiar and foreign to him. With friends turned foes, he only wishes to reclaim the love he has lost to the well.<br/>-Major spoilers for the game.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What he left behind

* * *

 

"I don't want to risk losing you to a well" Dorian's voice trembled ever so lightly. Eyes filled with vulnerability, no doubt he had a thousand scenarios playing in his beautiful mind. Despite the fear building up in his gut, he watched calmly as his beloved smiled at him gently and took a few determined steps towards the Well of Sorrows. He observed as the smile disappeared from his face and the facade called the Inquisitor emerge from within. Now, with the back straightened, face hardened and brows frowning, Trevelyan dunked his long fingers into the water as if testing its warmth. Dorian saw him take a deep breath, steeling himself for what is to come. Without delay, Trevelyan gathered some water within his palm, drinking it in one gulp.

The air around them shifted, the water darkened and Trevelyan staggered where he stood. As his face started glowing with what Dorian assumed were old Elven inscriptions, the young Inquisitor within the pool began to panic. He held his head and Dorian's own sense of dread finally caught up to him. He reached for him but the magical glow grow more intense with each passing second. He could hear the warnings from Solas and Morrigan. Both equally terrified but they did not fear the outcome as Dorian did. His treacherous mind conjured up images of Trevelyan laying on the ground, dead; The Elven inscriptions still adorning his face as an eternal warning.

He gulped down the fear and his hand flew to his staff when a dark grey mist covered the well. He could still make out Trevelyan and Dorian almost wished he could not. Eyes darting from one side to the next, Trevelyan looked lost and in pain. The calming blue glow turned into a searing crimson and almost immediately, the little pessimist voice at the back of his head told Dorian that something was wrong. His heart was torn apart with the ear tearing scream Trevelyan gave out as he gripped his short hair with an unforgiving grasp and fell down to his knees.

Dorian did everything, short of blowing the place up, to reach Trevelyan but the mist was as strong as he expected from the ancient elven magic to be. It did not let up, not even when Solas yelled that it was not supposed to be that way and him and Morrigan joined in to help dispel the wells magic. Even Cassandra, who has been petrified from the scene had regained her senses and called upon her Templar training to purify the well.

The mist only got thicker and took a twisted turn as the glow became more and more like a hot smoke; Burning whomever touched its edges. Dorian couldn't even imagine what being amidst that smoke would do to him. He called upon the last reserves of his magic to assist them and was almost hopeful for a second when he saw a ting of green glowing in the middle of the well. He taught to himself that yes, they could do this. They could fix this. With tears in his eyes and final drops of magic at his fingers he called out to his beloved one.

"Festis bei umo canavarum! If you don't come through this, I swear I'll kill you!"


	2. What he faced

* * *

 

"If you don't come through this, I swear I'll kill you!" was the last comprehensive thing Inquisitor Trevelyan has heard before a searing pain and an unforgiving darkness dulled all his senses. He didn't remember any other time when he had been so grateful to have lost consciousness. After that nightmarish pain threatening to bleed his brains out,  it honestly had been a blessing.

As he continued to lay down on the hard ground, Trevelyan's senses began to return one by one. First he felt the cold and wet soil beneath his back. His fingers on his right hand was grasping his staff with the metal casing and the icy cold weather made it impossible for him to relax his fingers. Then his hearing slowly returned. The undeniable sound of a rift crackling and closing was an odd comfort to him. In a few seconds loud voices made it through to him. He couldn't make out the words but hearing familiar voices eased his tension away. He was among friends.

He wondered why they didn't approach him. Why he was still hearing them from far away. He was a laid back type of guy, someone people got to trust once they learned to get pass the mage part. He had been slightly angry at the beginning, snapping at everyone, tongue dripping with poison, whenever someone dared to call him the Herald of _Andraste_   but he had made  up for that. Once he took the responsibility as the Inquisitor, he mellowed down. Even though he was a circle mage with an infinite hate for the Maker and his judgemental Chantry, he had learned to accept that faith came in all shapes and forms, and that people found peace and serenity in a time of war and chaos. So he stilled his tongue for most of time and even told Josephine to keep spreading the Andraste tale after their journey to the Fade. The shock on her face had been worth it.

So why was he alone and shaking on the ground? Did they think he had reverted back to his snappy, sod-Andraste-and-her-Chantry phase now that he had ancient Elven magic in him? The answer to his worry came soon enough. When he cracked open his eyes and his sight adjusted to the sun, he was greeted by a group of inquisition soldiers circling around him with their weapons drawn and fear in their eyes. Perhaps they were spooked because of the stunt he just pulled? He didn't really know and didn't really care. All he wanted was for his blighted headache to go away. After that he would grab Dorian to enjoy a hot bath together and warm his freezing blood.

Trevelyan groaned and eyed his soldiers warily but despite his attempt to ease them he failed to even lift his head to greet them. He also noticed that his throat was dry. How _joyous_ that he could still feel the freezing wind blowing while he couldn't even make out a sound of protest. He lifted his marked hand to his face; that he could have accomplish if not for the sudden hit from a shield throwing it back down on the ground and forcing to keep it there.

Out of reflex he lifted his staff to counter the soldier but his right arm was treated the same way as his left and with both his hands out of commission and his magic drained away long before that, Trevelyan realized that he was in deep shit. Either he had done something or something big enough had happened to the Well of Sorrows that he suddenly found himself in an entirely different geographical location with his soldiers turned on him.

He heard a tough and lovely voice ordering the soldiers "Bind him but be wary of the mark. We will take him back to Skyhold" Cassandra's strong posture behind one of the soldiers was as undeniable as the first day he met her.

With a small smile on his lips he managed to hoarse out her name "Cassandra..." That got her attention "We should stop meeting like this."

"How do you know my name? Who are you? Where did you get that mark?" The loudly yelled series of questions did nothing to relieve the throb of pain in his head and their meanings were enough to have him abruptly lift his upper body to look into her eyes and demand answers. However the sudden movement was met with pushing Cassandra into her Seeker mode and striking her sword's pommel onto his forehead without a moment's hesitation.

When the darkness claimed Trevelyan this time around, he was less enthusiastic about succumbing to unconsciousness.

*

"It's remarkable. It is exactly the same mark as the one Inquisitor Lavellan has. Even the location and the length of it is identical. The only difference is that his mark's glow is somehow stronger than Lavellan's mark; Brighter and has more strength to it." The unmistakable awe in Solas' description of his mark, wakened Trevelyan form a peaceful slumber.

"Solas? What happened?" he asked but from the way everyone stilled around him he could tell that something morbid had come to pass.

"How are you feeling, my friend?" the elven mage asked and Trevelyan opened his eyes to a dark, grimy dungeon cell with Solas sitting by his bed side with an extremely angry Cassandra and gob smacked Cullen behind him. To think the cold ground had been more comfortable than the bed he was currently occupying was saying a lot about where he currently was. Hands bound in that dreadfully giant lock and suddenly feeling very nervous, Trevelyan coughed until he trusted his throat to form proper sentences. Sensing his discomfort Solas put a glass of water to his lips which he accepted readily.

"Like a dozen Druffalos ran over me" he answered. "What happened to me?" Cassandra and Cullen shared a nervous glance but it was, as always, Solas who answered him truthfully.

"You fell through a rift. The said rift closed behind you without any interactions on our part which was quite fascinating." Trevelyan raised an eyebrow to that. Rifts closing on their own was not exactly a daily occurrence.

"I fell through a rift, again?" he repeated with disbelief evident in his tone.

"What do you mean again? Have you done this before?" asked Cassandra "Are you the one responsible for opening these rifts all around Thedas? Answer me!" Cullen stepped in between them before she can grab Trevelyan and he was grateful for it.

"Let him answer. He looks as confused as it is already"

"I am very confused" Trevelyan agreed. "What do you mean _again_ , Cassandra? You were there when I first came through the Fade!"

"I was? I don't even know who you are! Explain yourself"

"If everyone please calm down" intercepted Solas. "Let us start with introduction, because clearly there is more to this situation that what meets the eye. I am Solas, as you already seem to know"

"Yes, of course I know. And these are Cassandra and Cullen. The question is why do you not recognise me?"

"Should we?" the elf asked with a calmness that pushed all of his wrong buttons. Trevelyan took a deep breath to calm himself, just like Dorian had taught him. He wondered if he had been disfigured beyond recognition that his advisors and friends couldn't tell who he was. He feared for a second that maybe he would also face rejection from Dorian because of this but he scrapped the fear. He knew that they loved each other far too dearly.

"I am Tsion Trevelyan. Third born of the House Trevelyan and a Rift Mage, originally from Ostwick Circle. Also as you all thrive to call me, the Herald of Andraste and the Inquisitor of this damned Inquisition. Remember now?" He was growling by the end of his sentence but well...

"Stop with your nonsense! This Inquisition has only one leader and that is Inquisitor Levallan. Tell us the truth now!" Trevelyan's eyes narrowed at that. What the hell had happened at the Well of Sorrows? When he asked his question, he was faced with even more perplexed faces. As the voice of reason, he faced Solas for an explanation. Even the elf had a hard time understanding the situation which promptly scared the shit out of Trevelyan.

"It is the truth! Look, the mark! The one I got from that asshole, Corypheus' orb. The one I close the rifts with, with your insistence!"

"Solas, what is going on?" was Cullen's input to the argument and Trevelyan had the audacity to not to roll his eyes at his Commander.

"You mentioned a Well of Sorrows?"

"Yes, the one deep within Mythal's temple, guarded by the sentinel, Abelas..."

"You have been to her temple? Is this where you acquired the mark?"

"What? No! Look, we are running in circles here. Let me tell what happened, as far as I remember and we can discuss the rest later"

"Alright, but be quick" demanded Cassandra and Trevelyan knew he was on a time limit. So instead of the very beginning, he started with how as the Inquisitor they had been chasing Samson and that led to the temple where they met Abelas and the Sentinels. Then they had discovered the Well of Sorrows and the Eluvian and Trevelyan had drank from the well before Corypheus could reach them. He mentioned feeling an agonizing pain and seeing the crimson glows around him before passing out and waking in wherever they had found him.

"I fear a magic beyond our comprehension is at play" Solas said after a while "You had been a fool to drink from such a well with Old Elven magic"

"I can see that now." bit back Trevelyan "But it was either me or Morrigan and she wasn't the most trustworthy of the lot."

"I see"

"You do?"

"Not as clearly as I want to but I do have a few ideas. Commander Cullen, Seeker Penthagast, I have a suggestion I would like to propose. We should discuss it in the War room along with Inquisitor Lavellan. In the mean time you should rest."

"Not that I have much of a choice." Trevelyan muttered but as the three of them were stepping outside the cell he called out to them with a sudden thought "How is he? You two of you were with me when we had gone to the well so I know you are ok. How about-"

"Whom are you speaking of?" Trevelyan did a double take on that but really he shouldn't have been surprised to hear it.

"Dorian" he murmured.

"You know Dorian too?" asked Cullen with a serious and dangerous growl. Trevelyan knew they were friends but seeing Cullen this protective along with the whole charade was getting on his nerves.

"Yes, obviously. Especially considering that he is my-" Somehow he decided against finishing that sentence, fearing that he might put Dorian in a tight spot with the advisors.

"He is fine" snapped Cassandra and moved towards the stairs.

"Do not worry friend." reassured Solas "What you fear has yet to come to pass. The event which put you in this position hasn't occurred in this time so he is not in danger"

"Yes, of course " Trevelyan answered slumping back. He heard Cullen mutter something involving time magic to Solas as they followed in Cassandra's steps. He was left with an all too familiar loneliness and the stench of rot.


	3. The one who came for the research

* * *

 

Trevelyan thanked whatever was out there for his resistance to cold weather, and to even colder dungeon cells. Last time he woke up bound and on his knees, with Cassandra begrudgingly looking down at him, had been the beginning of a nightmare. All of a sudden vast amount of people loved him and even more hated him just because of a mark he had acquired by mistake. That's what Corypheus had told him as well. That he was a mistake. Perhaps the world was now fixing it. Fixing him and putting a better Inquisitor who was better than him. Maybe the Well of Sorrows had seen what a piece of work he was and the combined powers of all ancient elves had concluded that he in fact was not commendable enough to be the leader. They had judged and found him unworthy. With all the insistent denial of his powers, he taught he would have been happier to have the responsibility lifted from his shoulders but he felt more empty than relieved.

Whoever this Levallen person was, it was clear that they were cherished here, as the Inquisitor. Well he couldn't think of any Inquisitor to be booed away before dealing with the threat anyway.  And now they had two of them. Two Inquisitors and two marks. They should rejoice for they could close the rifts twice as fast now. Of course that's assuming that he was ever let out of the darkest corner of Skyhold.

If they did let him out then he would be happy to help out. The doom upon the world was present regardless and he had gotten used to it. Running around all day, doing paper work, flirting with Dorian... doing more things with Dorian... doing even more unmentionable and naughty things with Dorian and smirking at Mother Giselle's knowing look. Dorian was there and he was safe so maybe he could seduce him all over again. Especially after their time together he knew how to make the young man tick and it would be delicious to see him melt again.

Maybe staying here and starting over wouldn't be so bad. If anything he was an optimist when it came to the matters with Dorian. Trevelyan's hands went to his neck, in search of the old necklace, he had received from him. It was quite the surprise when Dorian had handed him his birthright amulet and told him to wear it as a good luck charm for the time being. If he were to die wearing it, he had threatened Trevelyan with bringing him back to life so that he could kill him again. That was right before their departure for the temple and he had assured the young necromancer with a fierce kiss that they would return together alive.

How badly he had been mistaken! He didn't even have any words to explain his frustration yet he found comfort upon touching the metal amulet piece. It was safely hidden beneath his light armour. They hadn't even bother freeing him off the blasted armour which was probably a plus considering the stone he slept on.

He let out a frustrated growl and remembered Varric telling him how unlucky he had been in this whole ordeal. The dwarf had been more right than he cared to believe but here he was, alone, abandoned and freezing his ass off. He could almost hear a divine being laughing at his misery; it was probably Mythal.

He tugged the locks and hit the walls with them, hoping the locks would break. He could try to create a rift and escape to the Fade but he wasn't suicidal yet. Also it wouldn't win him any loyalties with the Inquisition if he opened a rift beneath Skyhold. It might earn him Cassandra's very sharp sword in his chest though. He hit the wall beside him with an unrelenting force, magic at his fingertips. When nothing happened he raised his hands to repeat the action but was interrupted when an amused chuckle raised from the centre of the room.

Out in the opening, with light from the flames flickering on his face and with the most confident posture he had ever seen someone to have, stood the man he had longed to see. As if the sun itself was shining within the dungeons, Trevelyan could feel his blood to begin boiling and his lips to stretch into a smile. He found himself sitting up and then slowly raising up.

"Dorian" he said softly. Softer than he had ever sounded before, afraid to spook him away or worse awaken from his dream. The young man didn't reply back to him and a sense of dread filled his heart. With shaky hands he reached out for Dorian only to be pulled back when the chain around his ankle strained. He hadn't even realized that he had been chained to the wall.

"The seeker was through with securing you. It was perfectly reasonable to chain you up like a mad dog to prevent your inevitable escape attempt. Unless of course you decided to use your mark, assuming it has the same abilities as Lavellan's. She either didn't think of that possibility, highly unlikely, or more likely she was aware that we didn't have any sort of magical chain to stop you so she decided to please the ignorant eyes of the nobility with putting the ever so pointless chains on you. I am sorry. Am I speaking too quickly for you? You are pulling that face, you southerners like to put on when you can't keep up with an intelligent conversation."

Trevelyan, having become self conscious, realized that he had been staring at Dorian with his mouth gaping open. He quickly regained his senses and let go of the breath he had been holding. "My apologies. I was overthrown with your visit."

"I assumed you would be expecting me. After calling my name while both unconscious and conscious" he retorted  "You put me in quiet the position. And here I am, haven't even heard of your name before."

That final sentence hurt more than any injury he had ever sustained before. He closed his eyes and turned his head away. He needed a minute to gather his thoughts and not fall on his knees and beg Dorian to remember him, to remember them.

"Now, I am not above a bit of worship. If I have ever charmed you out of your wits, I understand. But it is difficult to imagine I would forget a handsome face such as yours. Had we met when we were younger? Perhaps you had visited Tevinter during a summer?"

"I was a circle mage. Travelling wasn't exactly an option" Trevelyan answered finally. It hurt hearing Dorian speak like nothing had happened between them and he really needed him to shut up before he blurted out how much he loved him. Knowing Dorian, such a declaration would only serve to drive him away. This Dorian was not the one ready to hear those words. And by the heavens, if he was stuck in this place, whenever or wherever it was, he wasn't going to scare Dorian away before even properly meeting him.

"Solas had mentioned that. Among other things..."

"Did he sent you to gather information?" snapped Trevelyan. he hadn't meant to do so but it hurt to stare at those precious grey eyes and receive no warmth from them in return. "Sweet talk me into revealing the truth?"

"Is it working?" At least he was still brutally honest.

"Yes, it always does." Dorian made an unreadable face at that but didn't pursue the subject. "What else did Solas mention?"

"He said that you could be the victim of another time magic gone wrong. That you come from the future and using your superior mark you punched a hole through the time itself and fall into a different past than your own."

"How can I go back in time to a different past? What, do I not exist in this world? Did I die at the conclave and someone else took hold of the anchor? Was Alexius' theory right?"

"So you have met Alexius?"

"Yes, that's how we met." and what a glorious sight that was. With Dorian in his prime element, destroying demons and cheekily flirting with Trevelyan the moment they laid their eyes on each other..."In the Chantry, right before Redcliff and the time travel. We were thrown into a year in the future but Alexius had tried to erase us." Dorian remained silent at that. Fidgeting in his place, he appeared to be contemplating the possibilities as well.

"Tell me of this time travel" Dorian demanded. Trevelyan realized that he was looking a reason to believe his words, to check if he was an imposter or an agent sent by the enemy. It was in his best interest to tell the tale to it truest and be approved by Dorian. Otherwise he wouldn't be able to convince anyone about who he really was. So he strained his throat and told Dorian of their time in Redcliff. He carefully avoided praising young man or how charming and smart he had been during the ordeal and how he had been entranced by him in those few hours they had known each other. The praising had became a habit on his tongue after that ordeal as Trevelyan enjoyed seeing the faint blush adorning Dorian's cheeks while they would shamelessly flirt in the library or on the road to close some rifts or during dinners. Oh, how he wanted to do that now. Close the distance between them. Grab his neck and devour his lips while holding his naked shoulder with his dear life. How badly did he want to rake his hands through Dorian's soft hair and feel his moustache burn his lips. When their bodies pressed together and as Trevelyan's hands possessively roamed and explored his body, feeling it grow hot and hard under his touch; to see the same desire burn in those beautiful eyes, that feeling of being wanted and wanting him in return had been what kept him alive all these months.

And now the same eyes bored into him with a distrust and an unbelieving scowl.  "I had travelled through time with Lavellan only." That name again... Trevelyan was already sick of hearing it and he hadn't even meet whoever this Lavellan was. Wait, was that person with Dorian, as he had been with him? What if they were together. No, he shouted in his head, do not think of that!

"For you to know of it in such detail... Kaffas! Wait here, I need to have a word with a certain elf" said Dorian, oblivious to his inner turmoil.

"Right... I'll wait here." He gritted out and then yelled after Dorian who has been almost flying out of the dungeon. "Send Varric if he has time. I have a glorious fucking story to blow his mind off!"

 


	4. The one who came to help

* * *

 

Varric didn't show up, much to Trevelyan's dismay. Perhaps he shouldn't have used a phrasing including blowing things up. He knew that the hair-free dwarf had a nasty history with shits blowing up. Quite literally.

He would have been alright with anyone visiting him, honestly. Except for Leliana. If she showed up, he would probably open a rift faster than she could narrow her deadly gaze at him and jump through to Fade without a seconds thought. Wherever he ended was guaranteed to be safer than being alone in a dungeon with her.

He had to wait a long while before anyone bothered to check up on him. He even feared ending up as the real Cole had who had been left to starve to death. The thought chilled his blood and he shivered with the prospect of dying alone, forgotten and afraid. No, the inquisition was many things but ignorant, it was not. He knew the mark ensured him some security or at least some usefulness. From the look on his face Dorian appear to be fascinated by his story as well and despite the anger and the sadness was overwhelming, Trevelyan loved Dorian with every fibre in his body. He loved and missed him. His only consolidation was seeing him safe and relatively unchanged from his time with him. That meant that his love also had suffered at the hands of the same asshole of a father. Still he had to find small comforts or he would definitely lose his mind.

He didn't know exactly when but soon after calming his anger down and tiring himself with struggling with the locks on his wrists, he fell asleep and with this divine bad luck he found himself in the Fade. Of all the places considered, Fade wasn't such a bad choice but of course he wasn't alone.

"Solas" he inquired as a thin figure at the corner of his eye strode towards him. It felt odd to be there with someone else, least of all with Solas. The time worked differently in the Fade and he found his perception slightly more focused than the usual foggy awareness of a dream.

"You have both noticed an existence and identified it in a matter of minutes. I am impressed." the elf said. Trevelyan didn't mention that the Fade was no longer an anonym place to him.

"Well, there is only one person I know who can walk into someone's dream with such ease." He waited until he was facing Solas before continuing bitterly "After your discussion with my advisors, is this the conclusion you came to? To smoulder me in my dreams? Am I ever going to wake up, Solas?"

"I had no such intention, Lord Trevelyan. I wouldn't attack you while you laid in such a vulnerable position"

"I know, Solas. So what is the verdict then? Shall I expect a knife to the back once I wake up or perhaps Leliana prefers a more public event?"

"I was not expecting you to be so grim. Is the Inquisition in your time an unforgiving force?"

"No" Even to his own ears Trevelyan sounded like a broken child. "Why are you here then? For a stroll?"

"Cole found me" Solas explained while moving towards an unknown destination. The shapes around them began to take form and Trevelyan recognised the inner garden of Ostwick circle. "He pleaded in your behalf to sent someone to company you. He sounded so afraid, so unlike a spirit but his fear of you ending up as the real Cole was more than genuine enough to convince me."

"I do appreciate it. Relay my sincerest thanks to him."

"You can do so yourself. He mentioned he would look after you." They walked in a peaceful silence for a while as the shapes around them changed their forms. Trevelyan looked amazed at how clear his memories took form with just having Solas by his side and was even more surprised to come across his first room back in the Trevelyan Mansion. It had been so long since he last saw it but his small bed and soft velveteen bed sheets and even his toy bear, Normy, his mother had made for him was present in the room. A pang of pain hit his heart at the thought of this scene having never existed in this world, that there never was a Tsion Trevelyan, the third child of the Trevelyan household. No Tsion, no room, no Normy... Perhaps he had no place in this world. Perhaps he did not belong. Corypheus' words rang in his head 'you were a mistake'.

The scene around them sizzled and the scenery took a bloody shape. The broken courtyard of Haven appeared. A dragon soared in the sky and the barracks caught fire. Screams accompanied the crackling of the fires and blood covered the snowy pathways. A trebuchet stood amidst the falling trees and a courtyard filled with corpses of red templars and inquisition soldiers alike.

Trevelyan stood where he was, frozen by fear. The cold and the afterwards of the avalanche, the fear of never making it out alive after his face down with the Old Magister made him tremble to the core. The image followed on and even Solas seemed transfixed on the memory. the earth shook and the him in the memory told his companions to move and get out of the way. Then the dragon shook them apart and suddenly he was alone and Corypheus was approaching him, crossing a fire wall like it was a mere nuisance. He remembered thinking how offended Dorian would be to see that and then he recalled being relieved that he wasn't there to risk dying.

The both of them observed the exchange and Corypheus calling him a mistake. A word which echoed in the Fade. The memory then sassed the old magister and sent the last load on the trebuchet flying off into the mountains. As the mountains came down on them the Fade took pity on Trevelyan and the scene returned to a serene mixture of white and green blurred images.

"There is no mistake then" he heard Solas say once his heartbeat returned to normal "Even if the memory could be falsified, your reaction to it was genuine. You are an Inquisitor of Thedas. Not ours but perhaps you were a possibility."

"You once said to me" started Trevelyan "that in the Fade you could sometimes see things that has happened as well as things that could have happened. Do you think that's what I am; a what-could-have-been?"

"Yes"

"Thanks, you are a real poultice to my wounds"

"Would you have preferred me to lie?"

"No" answered Trevelyan "But you could have some tact. Learn from Cole, cover your harsh truths with pretty words"

"Pretty words doesn't change the meaning of the content"

"But it makes me feel better" Solas chuckled at that and it was both comforting and worrying. "Well now that you confirmed me to be a real deal, what is your advice going to be?"

"You still do not trust me"

"I trust my Solas and his judgement. Although a little bit better advice on the Well of Sorrows would have been appreciated..." Trevelyan corrected "You on the other hand is a mystery to me as much as I am a mystery to you."

"True. You are rather different than our Inquisitor but it is relieving to see you oppose our enemy with the same ferocity as she had done."

"The inquisitor is a _she_ then?" Knowing that somehow did wonders for his morale as his mind drifted off to his beloved one. He knew nothing could have happen between the Inquisitor and Dorian.

"Is it a problem?"

"Not at all" Trevelyan said with a cheeky grin.

"I can see that" commented Solas as he eyed the new memory forming around them. It took Trevelyan a second to recognise the secluded corner of the library where he and Dorian was currently all over each other.

"It's time the wake up then!" yelled the embarrassed man, trying to get Solas' gaze away from their intimate moment because he knew what followed that particular make out session.

"Of course" replied Solas, and the bastard was definitely smirking before he disappeared and Trevelyan woke with a start in his not so empty cell.

"That was close..." he mumbled to himself.

"What was close?" asked a worried voice and Cole emerged from the shadows. He felt a indescribable joy to see his spirit friend and smiled at him accordingly.

Cole took a clean wet cloth and cleaned his sweat from his forehead as he waited patiently for his answer. "Nothing of importance" he waved the spirit off but was glad for not being alone anymore.

"I am glad that you are happy with me. Did Solas help you?"

"Yes, he did, Cole. We actually helped each other. Thank you for sending him."

"You're welcome" He sent him an appreciative smile and soon drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

It was early in the morning when he woke up next to a fulfilling breakfast and a smiling Cole who undid the locks on his wrists. Finally free of his upper chains Trevelyan gulped down the breakfast while Cole was digging into his own with uncertainty.

"You are eating!" he exclaimed and startled the young spirit.

"Yes, I have started to crave for food. It is an odd sensation but Varric says it makes me more human and that it stops the singing in my stomach."

"I see. You have became more human" Trevelyan was taken aback with it. In his time he had favoured for Cole to be more spirit than human and deferred to Solas' judgement on the matter. Perhaps this Inquisitor took a different approach. "Well, you look happy"

"I am happy because I am helping you. And you are content, relieved to be free of your destiny. Was it that bad that even though you have come to different time and left behind all those you cared for, you are still glad to be?"

"Hey, I got to meet you all so no matter how bad it gets at least I can say that. I am a little sad though and a bit angry."

"You lost your friends and then they found you again. You are more than a bit angry but you keep it within your heart, shield it from the sun and cover it with empty thoughts so that I won't reach it."

"I fail at it, apparently" Trevelyan gritted as he took a sip of his water.

"No, you are doing wonderfully. I can barely understand your turmoil. Sorry. Varric said I shouldn't interfere with such shielded hearts where words cut deeper than blades and open wounds that can't be mended by hands."

"It's alright, kid" Trevelyan said with a crooked impersonation of the dwarf. "It's good to see that you have gained such common sense. It should help you a great deal in your quest to help others."

"Yes, it does. Thank you for saying that"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: Gareth David-Llyod is the voice actor for Solas. He was also an actor who played Ianto in Torchwood, and despite my excessive love for the show I had failed to recognise his voice in the game because it lacked the heavy Welsh accent. Shame on me.


	5. An Inquisitor called Trevelyan

* * *

 

Another day passed and Trevelyan's only company was still Cole. The young man, Trevelyan stopped calling him a spirit, was a good friend and company. Somehow Trevelyan felt that Cole was feeling the emotions he had while him and his Cole had spent time together and that Cole was channelling and accepting those feeling as if they were his own. It was both remarkable and unsettling. He hoped nothing would happen to Cole as a side effect to it.

The mage, who was also trying to forget the title of Inquisitor since he was no longer one, had learned a great deal from Cole. The Inquisition's latest mission had been on Adamant, with the Wardens and that psychotic magister whose named eluded Trevelyan. Apparently they had succeeded pretty much the same way he and his inquisition had and took down the evil magister after a fall into the Fade. Stroud had been left behind as he had done and felt a tug at his heart for the poor man who never appeared to survive regardless of the timelines he was in. It must be the after effects of that moustache. Not everyone could pull of a ridicules moustache, not like Dorian could, at least. He chuckled at that before growing melancholic over his loss. Feeling the shift in his emotions Cole, bless his human heart, dragged his mind away from the grim thoughts and resumed his summary of the past events.

The wardens have been pardoned and joined the inquisition, that much was what he had done as well. They would be dispatched to different missions and so on. This Lavellan turned out to be an adequate Inquisitor after all.

Towards the nightfall finally someone decided to see if he and Cole were still breathing. Actually it was a group of the inquisitions' finest, involving three of his advisors and Solas. Where Cullen and Cassandra appeared to fit right in with the dungeon's grimy atmosphere, Josephine looked a bit out of place. Not that it he would be foolish enough to voice it, lest he was determined to get that knife in his back.

He kindly introduced himself to Josie which earned him a chuckle from the lady and a couple of glares from the other two. He was so glad that his scariest advisor, Leliana decided not to join them that he was willing to play the coy little prisoner.

"Things would have gone a lot smoother had we received the same, kind introduction." Cullen said with a serious face. If Trevelyan hadn't known him he could have missed the tiny smile playing on his lips and in his voice.

"I was rather confused that day and the accommodations had been less than pleasant. Now I get regular meals and a friend to share them with." Cole beamed from where he sat "You can say it improved my mood quite a bit. Though it is still ways worse than my quarters at the top of the tower. The view especially was to die for."

"If you can talk this much then you have gotten much better. Perhaps we should cut down your visiting times. We can't have our prisoner be too happy" Cassandra chipped in. If Trevelyan hadn't respected and cared for Cassandra in his own time, he would absolutely retort back to her but he had promised Cole to be civil for everyone's happiness' sake.

"Now, now, Cassandra. I believe Lord Trevelyan has no reason to remain as our prisoner any longer. Now that our Lady Inquisitor has returned we can determine what to be done. If it is alright with you, Lord Trevelyan."

"If it means I'll be getting out of this cell, then I don't mind the direction; at this point whether it leads to freedom or to the gallows is irrelevant. I am accustomed to be locked up but I rather not have it repeated every so often"

"That is not-" started Cullen, who was looking stricken and slightly pale "This isn't the circle, Trevelyan. We won't made you into tranquil nor let you rot in here"

"Execution is a fair game though, is it not?" he replied with an icy tone. He could tell Cole was slightly shaking behind him, a symphony of Trevelyan's deepest and darkest hatreds at the tip of his tongue and ready to be spilled. The mage wondered for a second which corner of his bleeding soul would be whispered out loud; maybe it would be his hatred for the chant or the days he had been left alone in the circle's less than accommodating dungeons. Deep down he knew there was something which would take priority in the list of things he was suffering from and that would be the unfairness of having met Dorian and not seen him since then. To Dorian, Trevelyan must have appeared like a fun looking experience; a perfect candidate as the research materials yet somehow he spooked him off and now, he didn't know what came after this but he was done with it all.

First things first, he kneeled before the shivering blond boy and grabbed his shoulder gently. "Cole, look at me" he whispered and waited for the boy to lift his chin with unsteady eyes "It's okay, kid. Just let it go. Don't hold onto my feeling. There isn't anything you can do about it, alright? They just hurt you not me."

"But you are hurting. You were fine and they came in and you started hurting again. Go away!" he yelled at the others "you are causing him pain."

"Cole, look at me!" As Trevelyan brought out his thick, no nonsense Inquisitor voice the boy's attention snapped back to him. "Take a deep breath. You are more human now. You can now understand that regardless of whether something's causing you harm or not, you have to face it head on. If my time as an inquisitor has taught me anything it is that you can't keep running away, that you always end up facing your troubles one way or the other and the sooner you do it, the faster you start healing. This is one of those responsibilities I have to face, regardless of the consequences."

"I understand. Varric had told to stop making people and myself forget so we can learn from it. It is the same as this."

"Yes, the dwarf is smarter than what his smutty books let on."

"Those books are treasures!" yelled Cassandra before realizing what she just blurted out and blushed with a deep red colour. "I mean, they are helpful in spreading the name of Inquisition. Not the smutty ones of course, but the other ones."

"Yeah, we get it" Trevelyan said with a smile. "I am sure no one will catch you reading one of them."

"Of course not. Anyway, we must focus on why we had come here in the first place" Trevelyan took a deep breath himself and rose on his feet. His heart somehow felt lighter after their banter and if he managed to calm his pure hearted friend then at least he wouldn't die with an eye open.

"I was wondering that. If the Inquisitor hasn't arrived yet, why are you here? Going to give me a prep talk or remind me to act like a noble or something?"

"Sort of" replied Josephine.

"Seriously?" was the deadpan response they got from Trevelyan, despite him trying to act like a gentleman.

"Beforehand we were concerned with your claims; you can surely understand that we could not trust a stranger who suddenly fell off of a rift and declared himself the inquisitor. We have been doing a research on you and your background to determine the credibility of your claim. Soon after Lord Pavus spoke with you we came to two possible scenarios about whom you could really be."

"It is more of a how you came to be than who you are" Cullen clarified with a nod of his head "I guess Solas can explain it better than any of us combined here."

Trevelyan turned towards the silent mage who had been patiently observing their interactions. "I have no doubt in my mind; you are definitely an inquisitor. If nothing else, your knowledge of us, level headed interactions with Cole and easily maintained conversations with our advisors are enough proof to convince me. As they should be able to convince all of us.

"As for your existence here... I had many theories in the beginning but now they are down to two possibilities. Either drinking from the Well of Sorrows has caused an unpredictable reaction with the anchor, causing a rift to open in time and somehow to a different timeline. Or that same reaction has erased your existence from ever being born and in your own timeline and a different person ended up interrupting Corypheus' ritual."

"That is an easy to answer question, is it not? Ask my parents whether I exist or not!" Trevelyan was growling but he stopped before he got too rude.

"We have" answered Josephine "I am sorry to tell you this so bluntly but they said that they never had a third child" He felt cold waters spilling down his neck and suddenly the gravity lost his hold on him. His knees buckled and it was Cole who grabbed him tightly and helped him sit down.

"And my older brother and sister?" he asked with a shaky voice, unable to look them in the eye.

"They are fine." said Cullen and an eerie silence filled the dungeon. It was Solas who broke the silence.

"The problem with my theory is that had you existed, even if you had died at the conclave we would have known that you have been thrown back in time to a different timeline. But with no trace of you evident, we simply cannot be certain of your existence."

"You cannot prove a negative" Trevelyan murmured "Something Dorian once said. I am an ambiguity and you can't do anything but believe my story."

"However you came to be here, the fact remains that you are here and we must act accordingly."

"What do you suggest?" Trevelyan asked, already expecting the question which would follow.

"As a carrier of the mark, would you, Lord Trevelyan, be willing to assist us in defeating Corypheus?" asked Josephine and Trevelyan almost laughed out loud at the obviously revised sentence. He decided to show a small smile instead. He straightened his back and approached the bars separating them, as much as possible. He wanted to properly look them in the eye and feel the truth and sincerity behind their request.

What he saw was a combination of determination and desperation, just like the first time they had met. In spite of their earlier arguments, these people were still the same lot he had been fighting alongside for all this time. He had already made his decision to help them out on his first time but he preferred not to mention it. He had to have a leverage.

"I sincerely hope you have a room better than this one because I am not willing to sleep beside Blackwall among the horse shit. Also I will be expecting a regular payment since I no longer exist in this world and my name is but a joke."

"Ugh, no one should be sleeping in a barn to begin with" said Cassandra.

"If the Inquisitor confirms it too, then we agree to your terms" replied Cullen after sharing a glance with both the ladies.

"I am glad to be working with you again" Trevelyan said shaking Cullen's extended hand. "And remember If you have a secret I probably know it" It was nice to them all go slightly pale at his claim.

"Oh, I like him. Perhaps we can further discuss these secrets, Lord Trevelyan"

"And give away my leverage? I think not, Lady Montilyet. You taught me better than that. But on other subjects I will be happy to oblige."

"Mage or not, he definitely is a nobleman" laughed Cullen. "We will return after we discuss your situation with the Inquisitor. Sit tight, Trevelyan."

"Just Tsion, if I do not have a claim to the name, I don't think I can use it with a clear conscious."

"We will return shortly then, Tsion."

And with that they had left, leaving a confused Cole and an apostate named Tsion.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Originally neither Cullen nor Solas was meant to be romancable. When the production was extended for a year, they added Cullen's romance option who was meant to be bi. But when they realized they didn't have time to finish that, they removed the male interest for him and instead added Solas' elven female romance option. Probably because it is easier to program one single and specific possible option than multiple raced and gendered ones.


	6. An apostate called Tsion

* * *

 

Just Tsion... He wasn't used to that. Everyone in the Skyhold always referred to him as either the Inquisitor or at least as the herald. Other times he was Lord Trevelyan. Even in the circle people had chosen to call his family name. The only person he heard his birth name was from his beloved one, in their most intimate moments. Dorian would scream and whisper his name like worshipping an old god. As they would lose themselves in each other, his name would be a mantra on Dorian's tongue. An intimate gesture and a sacred word only shared in the bedroom. And how he loved hearing that sound, how he loved making Dorian scream it out in pure bliss.

Now his birth name was all he had. Along with the stupid anchor, of course. But his name had lost its divinity. Muttered in every mouth, it had lost its charm. Might as well, he taught, it's not like he had seen or heard from Dorian since their one brief meeting down in the cell. Almost as if he had disappeared from the face of Skyhold. Not that he had the time to actually check out any part the castle but it was rather rude of him to not to come see him at all.

After their agreement on his last day in the dungeon, Cullen and the famous Inquisitor had made an appearance. It turns out Rio Lavellan was a Dalish elf who had been sent to the conclave by her clan. Of all the things she could have been , she had been a rogue and she was a bit aggressive in Tsion's opinion. Of course their first meeting had included more evil staring and little speech. Cullen stood behind her tense and serious but his eyes were following her every move fondly and with great respect. There was clearly some story there but Tsion didn't really care. At the end he was let out and a guard was appointed to _watch over_ him for the time being. He had actually gritted his teeth at Cullen but the Commander just shook his head. The decision went beyond him.

Hence he had a lot reasons to dislike the Inquisitor, but he didn't let it show on his face. He had bigger problems. Currently he was being escorted to meet Lady Leliana and he had to keep reminding himself that he was a grown man and a mage and he didn't fear his spymaster. Except she wasn't his spymaster anymore and he was a potential, unknown threat. He really hoped she would abide by Lavellan's decision and not hang him.

On his way he greeted Varric, who gave him a thumps up and a promise to listen to his story. Solas was busy painting some odd shapes on his walls and had just nodded towards him as they passed by. If he had climbed up the first set of stairs too quickly, the soldier didn't mind. As he slowed down, his eyes darted around the first floor of the library, looking for a very specific gorgeous hair but he was disappointed as the secluded corner was emptier than usual. With his shoulders slumped he continued on towards the upper level before he was poked in the ribs.

Two happy surprises were waiting for him in the spymaster's study room. Firstly Leliana was nowhere to be seen and his guardian walked off towards some lad feeding the crows to inquire about her. Secondly, Dorian was standing right there, leaning over the railings and closely examining a dead crow in his nest. His feet automatically walked towards him and having felt his approach, Dorian started talking in his usual fashion.

"Someone has poisoned this poor little creature. Could you imagine, what our world must have come to if some fool is desperate enough to harm an innocent bird as this. A shame really. Leliana has asked me to determine the type of poison although I am uncertain as to why I was called to assist since Sera or Varric would know more about the many ways of poisoning than me but perhaps I was the closest and she appeared to be in a hurry as she dashed down the stairs. Oh, by the way Lady Leliana is our spymaster but you already knew that didn't you?"

Tsion smiled, it was a mixture of pain and amusement. Unsure how his voice would sound like, he simply nodded in response.

"So, is it Lord Trevelyan or simply Tsion?" His heart skipped a beat when he heard his name being uttered by Dorian. He tried to remain stoic regardless "Your name has caused quite the ruckus here. Not that you heard any of it since you were locked up since you appeared. So which one is it going to be?" Tsion could almost believe that the young man was teasing him, fully knowing what that name did to him and his nether regions. In reality there was no way he could have known but this was Dorian and the man was anything but predictable.

"For now, Tsion is good enough." he replied while looking away. "Josephine said she will be contacting my family- well, whom are supposed to be my family, and ask if they would allow me to carry their name, in their terms."

"You are their child, are you not? It must be like hearing about a child years after he had been lost."

"Except, mother never gave birth to me. Maker, that sounded so odd."

"Odd is what we do around here, so you would fit right in." Tsion smiled at him, feeling slightly better. Although he smiled back, Dorian somehow seemed a little out of it. It wasn't the same vibrant smile he had shown him over and over again.

"You seem distracted" Tsion said after a minute of gazing into Dorian's eyes. He recalled the last time he said that and he could hear the reply in his head _'sex will do that to you'_. He blushed like a teenager and turned his gaze towards a crow in the cage nearest to him.

"Asks the person who gets distracted by his own question" he could hear Dorian's laugh accompanying the sentence. Now he had to re-remind himself that he was a man and a mage to simply be able to look at Dorian's handsome face and to avoid turning into a tomato.

"Sorry, I lost my train of thought there. I have been locked away too long I suppose."

"If you say so. As to your question, we just returned from a mad chase in the Hinterlands; closing rifts and alike. You know how it is."

"I do. In my time I used to drag you to Hinterlands and beyond. For menial tasks and rifts alike."

"Did I complain there too?" he asked. Trying to straighten his back but wincing at the sudden movements. Tsion narrowed his eyes, grasping the railing tightly in worry.

"Yes, especially the horse rides. Did you injure yourself?"

"You could say that" he replied cryptically. Tsion wasn't going to accept that as an answer though.

"I could always give you one of my famous back messages. Guaranteed to fix your back and neck problem in one session."

"Aren't we confident! Or are you just flirting with me, Lord Trevelyan?"

"You never complained about it before or afterwards" Tsion said and as Dorian's eyes grow bigger he realized the double meaning behind his words "Sorry, it must be weird talking to someone who has known you longer than you know him"

"You are right. Also it is creepy. Not that I am calling you a creep but you must understand how this sounds."

"I know, Dorian. I keep reminding myself that these people do not know me. That if I were to walk into the Undercroft, I would be kicked right out by Harrett and Dagna wouldn't even stop to look my way. It is difficult to keep my posture up and pretend that I don't know or care about them because I do, yet I can't make them believe it."

"If it is any consolation I am certain Master Harrett would kick me out as well. The man had spit on the ground when we first met. As an outsider, I understand what you mean and you are wrong. You can make them believe your good intentions by actually showing them. I am certain you weren't always popular yet you had them believe in you and they had named you the Inquisitor. If you had done it once you can do it again. Maker knows being treated as an outcast never stopped me from doing what I did best."

"You still did your best" he agreed "As a pariah, you accepted your role and moved on."

"Indeed"

"I have seen you do it many times you know. Your strength and bravery are qualities I am envious off." Dorian looked rather pleased to hear the compliments. A hand went to his moustache and the other curled around his stomach. It looked like a defensive motion as if Dorian wanted to swat away his kind words but was too satisfied to hear them.

"My dear Lord Trevelyan," he said with a sultry voice and Tsion's breeches suddenly got very tight "I don't know anything about bravery but my strength comes from determination to see this through to the end. Can you say the same?"

"You give yourself way too little credit, Dorian. I have seen what you can do. I have witnessed firsthand how you stood up for what you believed in and fought your way out of a nightmare. Any lesser man would have succumbed long before but you made your own future and when I got lost, to find my strength all I had to do was to look at you and that was enough to get me going. You were one of my pillars and don't ever think of yourself less than who you really are."

"Oh" came out and Trevelyan took in the sweetness of the shocked face before him. The mouth which has been forgotten ajar gave him all sorts of ideas and he thought how nice it would feel to kiss Dorian breathless. He refrained from doing so. Instead he chose to tease him, a little bit.

"Rendered speechless I see" he said smirking "I should give you fair warning, Dorian, I am very good at taking your breath away."

"I can guess why" Dorian murmured and quickly regained his posture "What I meant is, I would like to see you try and beat me at it. I was simply caught unguarded but now it is a challenge."

"Are you certain you want to make that bet? Have you already forgotten that I have head start?"

"The bigger the challenge, the sweeter the victory. We shall see who emerges as the victor. Now I shall leave you to your work. Lady Leliana has been patiently waiting for long enough" Out of reflex, Tsion looked around in panic until he caught the eye of the spymaster. Swallowing hard, he nodded at her.

"And that's my first point" Dorian whispered to his ear and left the scene in a rush.

"So what is this bet about?" asked Leliana with a knowing smile.

"I honestly have no idea" admitted Tsion "Wait, wasn't he supposed to determine what poisoned the crow?"

"Yes but since he provided me with a much more valuable information. I will let it slide. Now take a seat, Tsion. We are to have a long discussion about the Empress of Orlais."


	7. A home for the damned

* * *

 

"Congratulations are in order, Lord Trevelyan" The singing tone of  Josephine's voice brought Tsion's attention back to the matter at hand. Sitting in front of the fireplace in Josephine's study room, Tsion took the extended letter. "I have just received word that Lord and Lady Trevelyan has agreed to let you use your family name. Even more so, they are very eager to meet you in person as soon as you are able to take a break from your busy work."

"How on earth, did you convince them to do that?" He asked. "How can anyone explain my situation and get a positive remark out of it?"

"I could say I am a miracle worker but that title belongs to our Inquisitor. So let us assume this was one of the leftover miracles that we used." Trevelyan raised an eyebrow at that.

"You got Inquisitor Lavellan to make an official request, didn't you? For the benefit of the Inquisition and future of all Thedas" The sweet, overly innocent smile was all the confirmation he needed. "You trained me well Lady Montilyet. I can see right through you."

"Very good. I also offered them a chance to write their names into history books. Right now, a second herald of Andraste appears as more of a sham than an actual thing but soon you will start going out and earn a reputation for yourself."

"Don't you think that the existence of two 'chosen one's sound less divine and more human made. It might diminish people's faith in the Maker. Not that I would complain about it but you have got a lot riding on that faith, don't you?"

"I am impressed with your vision, Lord Trevelyan. I can see what you are saying but the thing is, a person who has been saved from certain doom would not think to doubt his saviour. A second herald in just words will be unbelievable at first but that is exactly why you will need to work twice as hard to increase your reputation and when enough people believe in you, the world will forget that you weren't even there at the beginning."

"Funny how I actually was there. Just not here, _there_ if you get what I mean." Trevelyan murmured.

"This is getting confusing. Instead shall we focus on the work you can do while we wait for the others to gather?"

"Sure" he replied and took a sizeable amount of the paper and letters which has been scattered on Josephine's table. Going quickly over the main outline, he came to realize that he had done all of this work while he was in his own timeline. That was a very good thing in his opinion since he remembered what most of his decisions resulted in.

"I guess I can help more people this time around" he admitted to his smiling Lady Ambassador, who has been waiting for him to catch up to her line of thought "You had already expected that from me."

"Yes. Shall we begin?"

*

The clouds had dispersed and the sun was finally making an appearance. Warming his bones under a rare sun bath, Trevelyan ignored half of the remaining work load which Josephine was currently fussing over. As the advisors and the Inquisitor rolled in one by one he was almost grateful for the distraction. During the war room meeting, with specific tactics and names provided by Trevelyan, the ambassador had announced that he had deserved to go out into the wilderness once again. Cullen was unsure about it and Lavellan looked sceptical but they both agreed to consider it at the end of the meeting. After providing the detailed and elaborate events of the upcoming ball in Orlais, Leliana had no complaints about Trevelyan but actually sending him out on his own was still mulled over.

The plans were considered and strategies were made. It felt odd. Not leading the inquisition was a truth he accepted fairly quickly but in close quarters with his three advisors across from him and not leading the planning was a fact that he had to remind himself. To refrain from reaching out and moving the pawns, he ended up crossing his arms over his chest and taking half a step back from the table. This was Lavellan's trial now. He had to let her do it.

When the subject slid to the Imperial Ball, Leliana summarised all of her knowledge she obtained from him. With players out in the open and no secrets hidden, the whole nobility of the Empire smelled of rotten eggs. Lavellan was as displeased with them as Trevelyan once had been which made him like her more. Whomever Lavellan has chosen to support at the end of the ball depended on her and he only explained why he had chosen to leave the Empress on the throne. Lavellan wasn't entirely convinced of his choice but to make a real decision she had to be there and judge the people by herself.

When they were finally done he stretched his back and hearing it crack was a sign of hard work which pleased him. Leliana nodded her thanks to him as she passed him by and Lavellan gave him a curt thanks. Cullen actually stopped to chat for a minute or two. Falling back to old habits, Trevelyan was able joke around good heartedly and he was invited to play a game of chess with the Commander.

He retired back to his room which has been designated somewhere where rest of his friends had stayed. It was small but clean room with a single window looking over to the mountains and a desk for him to do more work on. The bed was mediocre at best. If it was his own quarters, he would have sent it away and order one of those Orlais style master beds but the harsh reality was that he had nothing to pay it for. Now he had a name, even if it has been extorted from his parents, it was still a good name. He really wanted to meet them though and see the shocked faces when they noticed how much his face looked like his father's and how his hair was the exact colour and shape of his mother's. Even if they wished to deny any relation to him later on, nobody would have believed them.

Amused at his own thoughts, Trevelyan spent the better half of the afternoon resting and trying to remember about his missions as much as possible. He had been provided with ink and paper to record any important detail that he would need to inform the advisors about. He had been lost in memories and was very close to get swept away in melancholy when a gentle knock on the door disturbed him.

He got up grumbling and pushed the door open to face his favourite dwarf. "How do you do, herald? Got some time to come down to the piss hole and get shit faced? Or are you too busy brooding?"

"How did you- Did Cole sent you?"

"The kid was worried. He didn't want to smother you with his hat so he sent me instead. What do you say you want to share the rest of your infamous story with us then?"

"Boy, I can use a drink actually. I have been locked up so long that I forgot that I actually drink."

"Brooding does that to a person" Varric explained as he closed his door "Next you will start writing manifestos and without anyone realizing it you'll end up blowing a chantry or two!"

"I won't blow up anything, I promise. Well, maybe just Corypheus' head but I think people are expecting that anyway."

*

"The taste of thiiss shittt doesn't change, I'll tell you thaat much" Trevelyan slurred as he downed his third drink. "Where is Bull? The chargers are there in their usual corner and I can hear Sera giggling from all the way up there. She is up to a mischief, mark me words. Shouldn't the Bull be heere too?" Varric shook his head in disbelief. Three drinks was all it took to make Trevelyan lose his shit.

"Forget Tiny. Tell me about you. I need some juicy details. Anyone you left behind back in your time or whatever?" He sipped loudly trying to ignore the sudden solemn look clouding Trevelyan's eyes. "Sorry if you don't want to talk, I understand"

"But you don't, do you? Not really..." Trevelyan said with a heavy, tired voice. He put down his drink and averted his gaze. "Nobody can understand it. It's alright though, I get it and I am not wishing it upon anyone because you know what? It hurts like a freaking nightmare. Solas calls it a different timeline but I know what he is really thinking; he thinks that my timeline has been erased or I was erased."

"You are still here, Herald. You didn't get erased." Varric made a really good point with that.

"Then it is worse. Because it means that everything and everyone I ever cared about got erased; my life, my family, my inquisition, my Dorian..." He took a deep, shuddering breath, missing out the sharp intake from his side "And don't tell me that you are still here. It doesn't count. You don't remember it. I never had much in life, Varric. But what I had I was proud of. I was proud of being a mage and of having my family even though they practically left my crib at the circle doorsteps. I was terrified of the Inquisition and tried to run away a couple of times. You lot convinced me to stay and lead. After coming to terms with my inevitable role in the inquisition I made sure to turn it into a place I could be proud of, too! And now look at it, it's gone like all my life and everyone I loved and loved me in return. That's what pride gets you. A literal nothing"

"Slow it down with the drink, Herald." Varric put his hand on his almost finished mug "It might have been erased from our minds but it doesn't have to be lost, Tsion. Talk to me and we'll make it into an immortal story, what do you say?"

"You used my name. You are serious."

"Of course I am. Why do you think I write?"

"For fame and glory and money!" Trevelyan replied with a smirk. Varric patted him on the back while returning his smile.

"Those too but I write to immortalize great heroes with tragic pasts and infinite hope in their belts."

"Do you think I am a hero, Varric?"

"You fit all the criteria, Herald and I doubt it gets more tragic than losing everything. Don't pout and look on the bright side; at least you were given a second chance to live the rest of your life."

"Yeah, alright" he said enthusiastically and gulped down the rest of his beer after rescuing it from Varric's clutches "But I got a condition"

"Name it"

"We are gonna add lots of sex to it. Because the sex was amazing. It would be a bloody shame to leave it out. Okay?"

"Agreed. I believe I even know whom you are talking about; A certain moustache man, right?"

"You are a smart man, Varric! Let's drink to you."

"A dwarf, but thanks anyway."

*

By the end of the night Trevelyan was a whining heap of curses. Varric could never have guessed that the young man had a mouth like an Antivan sailor yet the Herald was more than happy to prove him wrong. Thankfully most of his insults were hidden behind his slurry speech and they avoided getting into a fight. What shocked the dwarf more was Trevelyan's story, it was almost the same as his Inquisitor's with minor differences here and there; A few judgemental calls were unlike each other and of course their choices in partners had been vastly different. He really shouldn't have been so surprised to hear Sparkler's name roll out of Trevelyan mouth every two minutes. The boy was smitten beyond repair. He had to actually stop him before he became too explicit in describing their bedroom adventures and by the stone, was that worthy of having a whole dirty novel dedicated to it.

Besides his light weightiness in drinking, Varric feared for Trevelyan's mental health. He was a proper mess. He kept his composure during the day well enough but a bit of drink brought out all the nasty things which has been festering inside him. No wonder Cole often had an urge to reach out to him.

All in all this had been a good night for both of them. Trevelyan had poured his heart out and although he might wake up with a nightmarish headache in the morning, at least his shoulders and chest won't feel as heavy.

Speaking of heavy... "Hey, Tsion, Herald. Wake up! You need your beauty sleep and a dwarf needs his solid eight hours if we want to wake up for the lunch in time."

"You listened real good, Varric. Thank you. Now answer one little question and I'll get up."

"Shoot"

"Is Dorian happy?" That wasn't a question he wanted to answer.

"Why don't you ask him? Sparkler loves to talk about him"

"Because he would just lie or cover it up. He doesn't like asking for help from others and he would definitely shoot me down."

"Kid, look. I don't know what to tell you. He seems happy. He is always smiling and bragging about himself. He is a good guy too. I am sure he is doing fine."

"Yeah, but is he happy?" Trevelyan asked again. He lifted his head off of the counter and for a second Varric could swear that he had sobered up just like that. He lifted his marked hand "I have the divine bad luck. But if this anchor has brought one good person to life, besides my favourite dwarf of course, that would be Dorian. I loved him with all my heart. As cheesy as it sounds, it is the truth and then I lost my Dorian. The one here is the same but we haven't shared the same experiences so we don't really know each other. Of course I still know his favourite dish, or the way his sides tickles with the ghost of my breath or how sensitive he gets after sex."

"Keep to the point, Herald" Varric said with effectively cutting him off.

"Right, the point is; the last time I saw him he wasn't happy. He had his charade mask on and he pretended to be happy. Something was bothering him and I swear he was in physical pain too but he didn't complain at all. And this is Dorian, he complains about the sun rising or rain raining."

 "I really didn't want to tell you this, Tsion but I guess you are going to learn it eventually."

"What?" Trevelyan turned to him and he was most certainly sober now.

"He was here drinking before I went to fetch you. And so was the Iron Bull. They both had been drinking a lot and well,"

"Just say it" Trevelyen whispered already looking at the ground and wishing for it to swallow him up.

"They left together, and my guess is that they ended up in one of their beds"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: The voice actor for the amazing Iron Bull and the (unromancable) James Vega from Mass Effect 3 are the same person. Yeah, it's hard to believe but what's more surprising is that this voice actor is Freddy Prince Jr. The same guy who is married to Buffy in real life and is the proud owner of the nickname "Pie"


	8. A nest of intrigue

* * *

 

Trevelyan woke up to a grinding headache and burning sensation in his right hand which was surprising since it was usually the mark that hurt. Upon examining his hand, he found an ugly swelling and minor gushes across its back. The reality of his actions came back to his mind in a seconds noticed and he recalled how he trashed the tavern with his bare hands after hearing about Dorian and the Bull. He hadn't even used magic to trash the place. He was a damned mage not a barbarian!

He covered his face with the pillow under his arm and muffled a scream. Maker, he was a mess. A hopeless, pathetic and lonely mess. He threw the harmless pillow across the room. Suddenly buzzed with energy, he sat up. He needed a target to shoot lighting at. Or maybe he would just punch them. Apparently he was a barbarian now so no use in denying his nature. But firstly he had to go down the tavern and assess the damage he had done, apologise to the keeper and clean his mess up. He was going to be a responsible barbarian.

It took him great effort and a few bottles of potions to make him representable to the world again. As the sun hit peak, and noon bells started ringing Trevelyan gently entered the tavern which to his dismay, looked clean and in place. Had he dream about trashing the tavern? Why was his hand hurting then? Unsure of how to direct the question, he approached the dwarf behind the counter.

"Sorry, by any chance was there any lasting damage done here?"

"Damage? What damage? Wait, you are that new human with glowy hand. I recall seeing you drink and then you flipped out."

"Oh, yes did I break anything? Please accept my apologies. I have been called a hot head before" The keeper started laughing at his face, took a deep breath and then laughed some more. "Glad to make you happy"

"Break anything? No you didn't break anything. You just screamed, tried to lift one of the tables for some reason and then dropped it on your hand. The rest of it, you don't want to hear, trust me."

"No, I don't."

"It was the funniest drunk stunt I had seen in years. Come back tonight and I'll get you a drink on the house." The dwarf went back to his chores, still snickering beneath the beard and Trevelyan chose to ignore him for his own sake.

"At least I am not a barbarian"

"I would like to meet the man brave enough to claim that you were" came a loud reply. Trevelyan covered his ears in agony "Hangovers does that to a person. Headaches and stomach aches and all around heart aches."

"Dorian" he said with his heart at his throat. He gulped down nervously, avoiding the young man's attentive gaze. He already had a killer headache and looking at Dorian just made it worse.

"Trevelyan"

"Please, don't yell. What are you doing here at this hour?" It was a weak attempt at a normal conversation and Trevelyan did everything in his power to not to imagine Dorian's night and to act normal. It was more difficult than he imagined it to be; The knowledge still too fresh and a red mark still apparent on Dorian's neck.

"Just catching up to some alcohol I had missed last night. Then I'll continue my search for Corypheus' name in the library. Do not worry, I am not slacking off, not too much."

"I wasn't worried about that." Trevelyan said, finally lifting his head up "I am not the Inquisitor anymore so you don't have to answer to me about what you do in your free time or whom... Anyway, nice chat. I should go."

"Fair enough"

The speed with which Trevelyan has run out of the room made his head spin. His stomach lurched and his legs became shaky. It has to be the drinks, he told himself, the hangover was making him ill. That's all. He stumbled back to his room and splashed his face with the cold water from a large bowl which has been left by the Skyhold servants. Unsatisfied, he resorted to dunk his entire face to feel the coldness and lift some of the pain from his head. Cheeks numb and lips turned purple, he cleaned his face and sat at his desk.

He had to clear his mind of this Dorian. He wasn't his. They weren't together, they hadn't done the things he and his Dorian did. They didn't share any real memories and to him Trevelyan was but a stranger he flirted once or twice. Varric, could be right. If Dorian was with Bull and he was content to be with the Qunari, then he had no right to force himself between them. He didn't even belong there. He had no right to away Dorian's and Bull's happiness.

He had to get back in the game. Maybe visit the temple and look for real answers as to why he was really there. The well could shed some light on his troubles and unlike Solas' best guesses', it would be nice to have solid answers for a change. As much as he appreciate Josie's help and Inquisition's hospitality, enough was enough. It was time to bring out his hard shell and the hidden Inquisitor's persona back into the game.

Now that he was free to roam Thedas, the first place he would visit was bound to be the temple of Mythal. Determined, he made his way to Josephine's office.

*

"This sounds like a dangerous step to take." said Leliana as she considered his request to visit the temple.

"With Samson running around in it and the Sentinels on my back, yes it had been dangerous." started Trevelyan as he leaned on the table, one finger pointing to the temple's location on the map "But now it should be empty and as long as we follow the Elven rituals, Abelas was willing to help out. It is worth a visit. We need that Eluvian and the Well of Sorrows is too dangerous to let fall into Corypheus' hands."

"You make a sound argument, Lord Trevelyan. Perhaps we can afford to visit the temple and secure it before Corypheus attempts to take over it." The input made by Josephine was welcome but neither Leliana nor Cullen seemed satisfied with him. It was Cullen who countered her opinion.

"The Imperial Ball is in a week's time. We cannot afford to divide our attention. If we launch an attack in the Arbor Wilds without a proper back up, we may not survive it."

"The Sentinels and the Keepers of the temple are a formidable lot." Trevelyan's finger circled around the temple's location on the map "Last time we were chasing Samson to the temple and needed all our forces to reach it. We found him deep in the temple and beat him senseless with the help of the Sentinels."

"Then you know we cannot just march into the woods." Trevelyan knew he wasn't helping himself with explaining the dangers but sending the troops in unprepared was the same as sacrificing them. He didn't have the heart to do that. "Tsion, it's better to wait it out and follow your version. If you had captured Samson there at the exact given date, then we have one up on him. We can use your experience to trap him and this time we will be ready for him and Corypheus both."

"I agree with the Commander" Leliana said "Your vision or rather your familiarity of our close future is what gives us an edge. With your help we have been gaining allies twice as fast and Corypheus will soon be cornered. We still have time to deal with the temple so our priority lies with stopping the assassination attempt of Empress Celine."

"What then, you expect me to wait here, until you find a use for me?" snapped Trevelyan. He felt like his opinions didn't matter in the slightest, that he was just an irrelevant messenger boy. "I need to visit that temple to understand why the fuck I have been sent to this place, or have my timeline erased or whatever has happened. I can't do that while sitting on my ass in Skyhold. I'll just take a small team of four with me and infiltrate the temple. Learn what I can and secure the Well of Sorrows."

"Would you risk having Abelas destroy the well?" Trevelyan squeezed his eyes shut as Solas' disapproving comment ringed through the war room. He let out a low growl, making Josephine to take half a step back.

"I had convinced him to leave it alone before, I can do it again."

"As I understand the situation and from what I observed in your dreams, I don't think that would be possible. The major reason for Abelas to listen to you was because of his rush response to the immediate danger. Without the assault from a common enemy I find it hard to believe that Abelas would take your word of world peace to heart."

"Maker, it was a mistake to bring this subject to you. I should have just left on my own."

"You are far too good for that, Lord Trevelyan" Leliana's unexpected, kind words served to calm him down but didn't stop him from restlessly fidgeting with the chain around his neck. "You have grown in ways our Inquisitor has not. Any other man would have left but you chose to stay because you knew the risks involving such a gamble."

"Well, it doesn't really help me out though, does it?" he whispered "Fine, I'll wait until after the Ball and-" As if struck by lightning, Trevelyan straightened up and his shoulders shook with the force of a rage he hadn't felt in a long while. "Wait. Solas, did you just mention observing my dreams? Have you been poking around in my head while I was sleeping?"

"It was a necessary precaution." answered Leliana as Trevelyan's head snapped towards her. The calm demeanour only pissed him off more "We had to make sure the information you have been feeding us was real. Surely you can't blame us for being cautious in a delicate time such as this."

"Oh, so the spies you keep at my shadow aren't good enough for you, _Sister_ Leliana? You see a mage and the first idea that pops into your sweet little head is to mess with his dreams. _Well done_ , Lady Nightingale." Still fuming, Trevelyan pointed at the remaining advisors accusingly "Were the two of you aware of this controversy?"

"Yes, Lord Trevelyan. We had all agreed to ensure both your safety of the mind and ours. The risk of taking in a comp-"

"Stuff it, Josephine" he yelled and stomped off towards the door, brushing past the frowning elf. "At least have the gall to admit your true intentions to my face instead of insulting me with this bullshit"

With the final sentence directed at the guilty faces behind him, he left for the tavern, again.

 


	9. Misery loves company

* * *

 

"Fucking assholes... The lot of them! Is this what it feels like to be the enemy of the Inquisition? Lie after lie. Not one soul that I can trust. This shit is worse than one of Varric's tragedy novels. Shit!"

"For your sake I hope you aren't referring to my beer" The tavern keep observed Trevelyan dishevelled appearance with a wary eye.

"For the truth's sake, because somebody around here needs to be honest, your beer has always tasted like shit. But it was a good sort of shit. Unchanging, undemanding. So it's good."

"By the stone, why did I ever come here?" With a cheeky smile from Trevelyan, the bar keep shook his head and left him alone with his second mug. That happened very often these days; Trevelyan and a mug of ale. Alone and intimate, sitting on a bar stool with only a wall to accompany them. Once he had been the Inquisitor and the Herald of Andraste, a master rift mage and the unfolding -albeit slightly unwilling leader of all; now he was no better than the uncomfortable bar stool he had been sitting on. Maker, even the stool had more uses than him at that point.

"Finally somebody with the sense to start drinking themselves into a stupor at such a perfect hour."

"Dorian. How _surprising_ to see you here before the sunset" he retorted back at the young mage's unwelcomed initiative to start a conversation. And here he was having such a lovely date with the wall.

"My apologies if I have interrupted your self-pitying session. I simply couldn't resist seeing you all alone while drinking your problems away. How is that working out for you by the way? I know that when I drink enough to start arguing with the wall, like in this instance, I usually attempt to find another miserable soul to listen to me rant. It is important to appear sane in this corner of the world"

"I bet"

"Now, don't be snappy. An argument is improved tenfold when there is an actual trade of full sentences." Trevelyan snorted loudly and dunked the rest of his ale in one go in hopes to keep his mouth busy and shut. Despite him giving the cold shoulder, that little act acted to impress Dorian who chuckled at his antics. The young mage sipped his own drink and waited patiently for his moody fellow to say something but Trevelyan was too busy frowning at his empty mug.

It was almost a companionable silence. If he wished so, Trevelyan could imagine this to be one of their better nights where he and Dorian used to share after a tiring day in the wild; With drinks flowing, smiles shining brightly and more than a few shared glances. The two of them would sit with their friends and share a laugh while their hands and thighs would brush each other. The longing would fill what little air that was left between their breaths and they would be ushered out to their quarters to find warm pleasures in the cold nights.

Lips on hot skin, a combination of excitement and fear of getting caught at the bottom of his stairs would sent shivers down his spine. While Dorian's expert hands guided them to their bed, they would barely have the sense or patience to wait until all doors were closed. The desperation to feel every inch of Dorian would make him loose his mind and they would come undone together as the sun rose up.

In another time, where Trevelyan and Dorian were still together, this is how their night would have ended. Yet, here they were, sitting side by side, tipsy with the ale on his tongue and he has never been this far away from Dorian. The pain in his heart flared as he noticed the serene gaze boring into him from his side. The young mage looked so content to be without their relationship, happy even. And Trevelyan hated him for it.

"Alright, I'll bite." he bit out, fingers tightly wrapping around his empty mug while willing it to stop shaking "You came to pester me because you couldn't find yourself a Bull to ride?" He tried to ignore the pain crossing Dorian's delicate face and the tears forming in his own eyes. He had left the young mage speechless, yet again. Bravo, him.

Disgusted with his own harsh words, Trevelyan slammed his mug down and practically  ran out of the tavern.

*

He had to stop doing this. Retorting one liners to anyone who pissed him off momentarily and then bolting out of their side because he was too afraid to the see the hurt and the disappointment reflected in them. He was very good at it though. Once upon a time, he would stay after such outbursts and continue arguing until it developed into a full-fledged creative insult based fights. It had never bothered him to have a verbal battle. The problem here was that these battles were against people he hold dearly, albeit one-sidedly.

These people didn't know that he was all harmless bark and no bite. They took his outbursts with the utmost worst case scenarios in mind and they responded accordingly. It was a cruel reminder that these people were not his friends. His friends were gone, worse than dead, they had been erased and all that was left of them was what remained in his feeble memories.

It was unfair. They didn't deserve that. He did. Not them. He should have been the one to disappear from existence. It was his own pride that had driven him to ignore their advice and drink from the bloody well.

Maybe this was his punishment. Hiding behind the illusion of a second chance, Trevelyan had only been sent to this nightmare to suffer for his sins. And suffer, he did.

"You really shouldn't have run off like that if you were only planning to end up at my doorstep in this cold weather. You'll catch a cold and suddenly I'll be the one blamed for getting you sick." Trevelyan's head shot up and his arms which have been hugging his knees went slack with the shock of hearing Dorian's tender voice. He hadn't realized how badly he had been trembling until Dorian dropped to his knees and put a warm hand on his neck. "Come now, let's get you into your quarters. It is behind one of these doors, yes?"

"I... I-" Trevelyan stammered, unable to form words from his jumbled thoughts. Dorian shushed him with a kind smile and a gentle tug on his neck. And that was all it needed to break him down. With an undignified howl, Trevelyan fall forward, into the arms of the surprised mage. He grasped the fine material of Dorian's top with shaky fingers and let his tears fall freely.

"I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I am sorry that I am such a mess and you deserve so much more. I am sorry, so sorry..."

Frozen on spot, all Dorian could do was to wrap his arms around the shaking figure and pet Trevelyan's head with soft strokes. The mumbling apologies turned into heavy sobs and Dorian found it impossible to not to respond with kind endearments in return. He told the sobbing man that he forgave him, too but it fell on deaf ears. Trevelyan was lost in his own misery and although Dorian knew that misery liked company, he felt more like that pillar of strength Trevelyan had mentioned him to be.

Dorian never imagined this sort of an outcome when he started to tease the strange man with the glowy hand. Yet, here they were, a fully grown man, a mage no less, crying uncontrollably in his arms while he tried to warp his head around at both of their actions. Had they been flirting? Certainly. Did Dorian think that anything would come out of it? Certainly not. Did he ever expect to find him in such a broken state? Most certainly not. So, what in the Maker's name was going on?

After, what felt like a very short time, Trevelyan's sobs subsided and Dorian took a good look at his swollen but handsome face. Holding him at an arm's length, the young and confused mage cleared the rest of the tears from his cheeks and lend him a handkerchief to clean himself up. Trevelyan's eyes darted between him and everywhere else. The man had a hard time focusing but when he finally spoke, there was no trace of alcohol or uncertainty in his tone.

"I am truly sorry, Dorian. That was both rude and unfair of me."

"Apology accepted," Dorian replied with great ease "I must admit I have never had quite the wet and sincere apology before. It was exhilarating." The chuckled that got him was worth every snot droplets on his shoulder bindings. "Are you... alright?"

"Yes, I- I needed that. Thank you and sorry that I ruined your shirt.

"Oh, don't you worry about it. The shirt survived much worse conditions than that. Now let's get you up and about." With one swift motion, Dorian grabbed the slouched man by his sides and together they rose on their feet. When Trevelyan swayed dangerously, Dorian steadied him with putting his back to the wall. Trevelyan seemed dizzy, he had the aura of a man whom was lost and didn't quite know how to accept a helping hand to guide him out of darkness. Dorian remember what that felt like. He tried not to take pity on him. His sympathies, on the other hand were fair game.

Even on his feet, Trevelyan's shoulder's were slouched. It wasn't a look that Dorian liked on him. "Ready to move on?"

"No" came the definitive answer and Dorian was forced to gaze into two beautiful orbs as his head was grabbed and pulled towards the other man. Suddenly, between one breath and the next, warm lips were on his, moving chastely but with an ease that was gained after long practises. Strong arms were wrapped around his neck and the mouth kept on moving and licking his own chapped lips. It was such a strange motion to him. To be kissed with such gentleness, undemanding and slow. He responded because Dorian Pavus was a weak man when it came to enjoying the company of strong, determined men. He opened his lips a fraction so that he could capture Trevelyan's lower lip with his teeth. That elicited a low moan and he felt Trevelyan's arms tightening around him, bringing their bodies even closer.

With similar built and height, they fit into each other beautifully. A leg was thrown over his own when he dipped his head to one side and pried open Trevelyan's lips. The eagerness of which he accepted Dorian's tongue into his mouth, caused a bead of sweat to occur on his forehead. Both of their trousers were getting tighter by the second but Dorian couldn't get enough of this strange man who kissed him like there was no tomorrow. Mouth as wide open as possible Trevelyan kissed him deeply with no remorse and no rush. He wasn't used to being kissed like he was the centre of the universe. He liked to believe that he was while Trevelyan's tongue was messaging his, their crotches grinding beautifully and his hands moving up and down on his back.

He felt his own knees buckle and he had to support his body with Trevelyan's strong grip.

"Dorian" Trevelyan whispered as he started dropping kisses down his neck. He continued to sing his name like  a mantra which pleased Dorian greatly "I have missed this so much. Ah, Dorian..."

Trapped between a sweet dream and the hard surface of the door, all Trevelyan wanted to do was to push pass into the room closest to them and continue his devouring of the young mage on a more comfortable surface.

Dorian's hair felt like silk and his body grew hot beneath his fingers. The shallow breaths and the glazed looks he was getting was proof enough that he was doing something right. He kissed all of the smooth skin he could reach without easing his hold. Dorian seemed to melt under his ministrations and he had to recall that for him this was their first kiss.

He had half a mind to slow down and appreciate the swollen lips. Dorian still tasted like old books and quality wine. A taste Trevelyan was not prepared to forget. He couldn't help but smile when Dorian reached behind him and opened his door. He quickly hold on to the bare shoulder to avoid falling and was rewarded by the swipe of a moustache on his neck.

They stumbled into the dark room but didn't bother with any lights. Trevelyan's anchor glowing with a green light was all the help they needed to find the bed. He had never been more grateful to be living  in such small quarters.

With the familiar, heavy weight of his Dorian's above him, Trevelyan lost all his remaining senses. Suddenly clever fingers were pushing through his tunic, revealing his toned stomach while his own was lost in the locks of dark hair. He wrapped his legs around Dorian's hips and arched his back. The delicious friction making both men growl with impatience. Trevelyan nipped at an earlobe as his fingers almost ripped open Dorian's buckles and shirt.

"It is refreshing to meet someone who can pry open my buckles with such talent" he whispered with a laugh. As a silent response Trevelyan was ghosting his finger tips over Dorian's sides gently like he was holding a fragile thing. It sent a different kind of pleasure down his spine.

If Dorian was ever going to reciprocate any of that, it was made impossible the moment Trevelyan held his hips. Something between a soft cry and a muffled scream tore from Dorian's throat and Trevelyan stilled like he had been hit by an ice spell.

"It is alright" Dorian said quickly and he rose on his elbows with a pained expression, as if emphasising on the unimportance of his discomfort with putting pressure on his sore muscles.

"No, it isn't" was the emotionless reply he received before being promptly flipped over to lay beneath Trevelyan and on his back. Trevelyan's unsteady fingers pushed his shirt apart and big ugly bruises became apparent under the anchor's light. A sharp intake was all he needed  to hear that the magic was broken. "You are hurt"

"And you sound like Cole" chirped back Dorian. He really didn't need to be reminded of those bruises on his otherwise perfect skin.

"For a moment there, I had forgotten that you and him were together..."

"If it is such an issue to you that I enjoy the company of many kinds of men, then you shouldn't have touched me" snapped Dorian as his body grew cold. Embarrassment was evident in his shaky voice.

"I  don't have an issue with that" Trevelyan explained "I just don't understand why you are here with me when he is only a few hours away and why in the Maker's name would you let him harm you this way. The bruises are hurting you and you don't even see a healer to mend them"

"As for the latter question; he said, he was marking me so that I wouldn't miss him while he was gone. Qunari logic. I didn't really question it at the time nor I had any way to do so. As for the former me and Bull, we are not exactly at the commitment part of our _thing_ so no strings attached?" Trevelyan's brows knitted together and Dorian expected him to bolt out as he liked to do every so often.

"Do you not miss him then? The way you were kissing me indicated a desire for more than just a simple tryst."

"I was simply responding to an amazing kiss."

"So you simply got carried away?" asked Trevelyan with a broken tone. Dorian shook his head and reached out to brush his fingers on the mage's lips.

"There is something about you that draws me to you. I don't know what it is or why I feel it but I couldn't help but give it all I have got." After a second, to Dorian's surprise, Trevelyan draw back and got up from the bed completely. "Was my answer unsatisfactory?" He saw a glint of thirst and wildness in Trevelyan's eyes as the anchor's glow grew in its intensity and reached his eyes. Without breaking eye contact he buttoned his tunic and when he spoke next, Trevelyan's voice was dark and heavy like a well aged wine.

"I want you, Dorian" he said without blinking "Do not misunderstand my retreat. I want to take you like there is no tomorrow and make you quiver until you forgot your own name. But I don't do relationships half-heartedly. If I commit myself to someone, I expect the same in return. At this point, I am in no position to demand your loyalty or anything more than that. If you wish anything more to happen between us then you'll have to settle all your issues with Bull. Once you reach a decision, you know where I'll be"

"So it's all on me then?" Dorian replied, as he straightened and fixed his hair. As nonchalant as he was trying to appear, he knew that if he dared to get up his legs would definitely give out under Trevelyan's undivided attention.

"I have had my say. What's important here is what you want. I should also tell you that whatever your decision is you are an irreplaceable person in my life and I value your friendship. So if you prefer to keep the things as they are I will back down."

"Is this the part where you insinuate that Iron Bull wouldn't back down just as gentlemanly and you are a better person than him?"

"No, I know the Bull. He was a close friend of mine back in my timeline. I know he cares for the people he chooses to be with. This is exactly why I can't do anything more. It is unfair to him and his trust."

"The things you say... very well I shall consider your proposal. Although I am uncertain as to what you mean by a relationship but we'll see how this plays out. You can show yourself to the door" Dorian's flat tone and purse of lips halted Trevelyan but he quickly regained his composure.

"Good night, Dorian" he said as he reached for the door and a muffled, half hearted response was all Trevelyan heard before stepping back into the cold.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: If you wanna see what a real life Dorian might look like, check out the model, Rafa Rech. You won't regret it. You have my word.


	10. Two is company, three is a crowd

* * *

 

The night smelled of elfroots as Trevelyan's feet dragged his body to the inner gardens. He passed by a couple of pots containing the elfroot plant and an elderly Chantry mother who was busy harvesting them. He spared a quick look and a small nod to the Chantry mother as he walked deeper into the unattended inner sanctum. Simple fire within the lanterns enlightened the gazebo where a set of chairs were set in front of a chess table.

He recalled why Cullen preferred to spend his free time in this spot. Even under the darkness of this ungodly hour and despite the overgrown weeds, the garden was an inspirational location to behold with its many flowers growing all over it. He rested his feet on the opposite chair and stretched his back. The night was calm and peaceful enough to take his mind off of the images of leaving a bewildered Dorian behind in his room. His fingers found the Pavus birthright amulet below his tunic. Absentmindedly he swirled it in his hand, grateful that Dorian had not seen it during their sort of tumbling or  whatever the hell it was. Trevelyan didn't wish to think about the what-could-have-been's had he stayed with the young mage. He wasn't wrong about his way of thinking, even though it had been Trevelyan who initiated the kiss to begin with, he at least had sense enough to halt his advances before he regretted any of it.

But, by the Maker, it had felt so good! To taste those wine stained sweet lips, to feel the ticklish moustache on his skin, to be the sole object with Dorian's full attention on him... The soft breeze cooled his heat, but Trevelyan still felt the heat pooling deep in his gut.

Hoping that it would draw his attention from his primal needs, he assembled the stone pawns on the gaming board. It took him a while to correctly place all of the parts, he had always confused which square the Queen and the King were meant to stand on. He moved a pawn forwards from the white set and retaliated with a counter move from the black side. As his game moved forward between his current self and a ghost of what he once had been, Trevelyan refused to fall asleep for as long as he could.

*

"It looks like you have cornered yourself into an impossible position" The simple commentary startled Trevelyan out of his slumber. Cullen's unyielding demeanour casted a strong shadow on him as the man smirked down at him.

"You could say that for a lot of aspects in my life right now."

"May I join?" Cullen asked as he referred to the unfinished game. With a sigh Trevelyan removed his feet from the second chair and motioned for the Commander to take a seat. Moving a piece on the board, Cullen didn't waste a second before he dived directly into the uncomfortable subject that hang heavy between them. "I want to apologise for deceiving you, Tsion- uhm, Trevelyan. We should have informed you that we had been supervising you instead of going behind your back. It was an uncalled act especially after you so readily offered to assist the Inquisition."

"Or you could have just trusted me" he bit back "It's not like I have anything to gain from lying to you. This place is all I have and you are the only people who would have trusted me enough to not kill me"

They played a couple of moves in the awkward silence that followed. Cullen broke it as he saved his Queen from a dangerously close knight's hit. "Were we friends, in your old timeline?"

"Yes, I'd like to believe that we had been friends" was the honest reply "Why do you ask?"

"The way you hold yourself in the war room meetings and the determination in your posture convinces me that you are a decent man and a strong leader, Trevelyan, like someone I could respect and follow. I just wanted to make sure that my first intuition on you was not completely off base."

"It wasn't, Cullen. You are a capable commander and a good friend. Your virtues remain the same regardless of the timelines. It was thanks to my dear advisors that I was able to grow and became the person you see during the meetings. I have learned a lot from all of you and that's why it bothers me to be the butt of your ruthlessness"

"I am sorry, Trevelyan" repeated Cullen and the sincerity of that sentence was enough to make Trevelyan forgive them.

"I just wish that you trusted me as I trust you. I am aware that I haven't done anything to earn that trust but it is not exactly possible to do so if I am holed up in Skyhold. Even if the Arbor Wilds is out of question, at least let me go to Hinterlands or the Storm Coast and watch me close some rifts. It is much easier to gather my wits and keep my cool if I can direct my anger, along with some lightning bolts, at the enemies."

Cullen smiled at his eagerness to work and observed his anxious company as he moved another piece on the board. The Commander felt that there was a secondary game afoot and that Trevelyan showed great potential at playing it.

"You have a fine way with words, Trevelyan."

"So I have been told. Before I start screeching at someone's face, I try to charm them first. Force of habits."

The silence that they shared was more comfortable this time around. "What does that necklace symbolise anyway?" Trevelyan jumped back at the sudden question and his hands fumbled with grabbing the birthright quickly. He had completely forgotten to put it away and out of everyone's views.

"It's, uh, a gift from someone very dear to me. Well, more like a good luck charm that utterly failed at its job. I had received it while we were travelling to the Temple of Mythal"

"I see. It was a nice gesture. Too bad it didn't work"

"Yeah" he agreed "but it is still with me. A final reminder from that timeline so maybe it was only ever meant to accompany and protect me."

"That is a fine sentiment to hold on to." Trevelyan fidgeted in his seat, suddenly remembering his dreams in great detail.

"Solas disagrees with you on that one, Cullen. Last night, just before you woke me, I met him in my dream. He had the audacity to show his face instead of lurking in the shadows after our dispute yesterday. I think the _advice_ he gave me was this; _'to_ _accept the end of something is the only way to begin building something new'_. He wasn't entirely wrong but I am not ready to give up. We are yet to investigate the temple and as everything still remains a mystery, I will hold on to this amulet with all my strength."

"Do you think you'll ever go back?" the Commander asked with the innocence of a child. Trevelyan knew better that the real question was whether there was a place for him to go back to.

"I don't know. That's why I have to go to the temple. If there is an answer to this mess, it is there."

"We will get there, Trevelyan. Together. We will not risk losing you too. So promise me that the moment you leave Skyhold, you will not run off to Arbor Wilds; that you will wait for us." The mage took a deep breath and focused on the chess board. He noticed that Cullen's pawns had cornered his Queen and his King was left all alone. It was a sad yet accurate summary of his condition.

"I give you my word that I'll try not to run off. That's the best I can offer."

"That is good enough. I've faith in you that you'll do the right thing when the time comes." If Trevelyan had blushed it was certainly because of the morning sun falling on his neck. "By the way, after your dramatic leave, we have discussed what to do next. As all of the advisors and Inquisitor Lavellan will be leaving for the Imperial Ball in a few days, we figured that you might also gather a small team and go exploring. If you are still willing to do so."

"Seriously?" Not that Trevelyan could ever assume that Cullen would joke about this subject but he really had to ask.

"Of course. We have had reports from Hissing waters and Exalted Marches requesting urgent help with the rifts. You think you are up for it?"

"You waited to hear my promise to tell me this? Well, Cullen, keep this up and I think you may win at the Great Game all by yourself."

"I'll leave that to the experienced ladies. So what do you say?" Trevelyan smirked with delight and shook his head in disbelief. Josephine was effectively influencing Cullen too. Not that it was a bad development but Trevelyan would be grateful if his skills weren't all tested on him.

"Join me for some ale this evening, Commander and we'll discuss the best next course of action."

*

"So Vivienne and Sera are definitely accompanying us to the Ball" said Cullen and watched suspiciously as Varric dealt a set of cards for their next hand of Wicked Grace. "You will have to choose someone else. The dwarf seems to have a lot of time on his hands so feel free to take him along."

"Are you proposing this to keep me out of trouble or Trevelyan?" asked Varric and took the last deck of cards from the table. "Not that the poor kid's done any damage other than snapping at just about everyone and dropping a table on his hand"

"That wasn't my brightest moment. Can we forget it ever happened?"

"Not going to happen, Herald. I wasn't nearly drunk enough to forget a word you said. You should have seen him, Curly, he had the rage of a thousand burning suns but the strength of a new born puppy. The tavern keeper had good laugh though so it wasn't all that bad"

Trevelyan sipped his ale with great distaste and pursed his lips "Keep _shuffling_ , Varric. You are steadily going down on my favourites list. You are about to pass Solas' position"

"Have you not forgiven him, Trevelyan?" asked Cullen. The grip on his cards tightened and Trevelyan knew he couldn't resist the calf eyes the Commander was presently adorning.

"I am not really mad at him but I do need to direct my anger at someone or I'll just end up yelling at everyone else."

"Try Leliana" suggested Varric and Trevelyan's insides twisted with pain just at the thought of it. He had seen Leliana kill an armed man with her feet while she was bound and hanging and dying. He might be hot headed but he wasn't suicidal.

"I rather not yell at anyone" he replied as calm as he could. "Anyway, Cullen, who else are you taking with you?"

"Uhm, Dorian seems like a good choice, Lavellan will probably ask him to come with us as well" he answered with a hint of hesitation. Trevelyan tried not to flinch too much. The memories of Dorian from the previous night threatened to overflow him for a minute but he surpassed the urge to throw his mug across the tavern for the sake of the innocent bystanders.

The tavern was working at almost full capacity. He focused on their happy and relaxed chatter. The charges were singing a random song without a tune and Sera was teaching Cole how to cheat at Wicked Grace without using his abilities. Scout Harding was sitting by the corner while observing Krem very closely without the young man noticing it, that is until she caught Trevelyan's gaze and his knowing smirk. Cullen followed his line of sight but Harding was already packing up to leave.

Feeling more confident with his voice he turned his attention back to the confused Commander "That is a good idea. During my time, Dorian had mentioned that the Ball had reminded him of his homeland even though the other attendants weren't half as happy to see a Tevinter Altus among them. So it's best to ask him first."

"Any tips on how to convince him?"

"I had used my Inquisitorial charm. I am sure Lavellan will succeed as well"

"If you say so..."

Growing tired of the business talk Varric interrupted their talk "Alright, you bundle of sunshine. Let the man breath a little and enjoy his ale, it's not like he takes breaks every other day. Here, place your bets"

"I appreciate it, Varric but we need to reach a conclusion before they leave" Trevelyan responded, fully aware that he was walking into Varric's trap.

"I had meant Curly but sure, you can take a break from taking breaks"

"Rude! I am doing work. The other day I finished half of their total work in one sitting."

"Geez, does it help to have lived through it once? I should change your nickname from Herald to Oracle"

"I don't mind. Oracle sounds very intriguing." he said giggling "Oh, and fair warning, be on the lookout for Bianca. She might turn up one of these days"

"His crossbow?"

"You did not just say that! What has she done now?"

"Nothing yet" Trevelyan responded "Warn her to stay away from Valammar. That place is filled with red lyrium and don't panic, Cullen, I have already left instruction with Josephine to investigate the area."

"Well, shit! I am not sure if she'll listen but thanks for the heads up, Herald." Varric said and quickly stood up "Why don't you boys continue? It turns out I have got some more letters to write." With that he left the tavern in a blaze.

"Red lyrium? Why didn't you inform me of this before?" Trevelyan didn't take offense as Commander growled at him. "Maker, what else is out there that we don't know about?"

"You would be surprised. At any rate we should focus on our priority mission. I am taking Varric with me. Blackwall should come too and maybe Cole or Cassandra, assuming that she doesn't want to kill me anymore?"

"That won't be possible, Trevelyan" He shot the Commander a dirty look. Cullen rubbed his neck suspiciously and continued with his explanation "I mean, since you revealed that there are in fact three sides to the assassination plot, we will require their help."

"Is this your subtle way of ordering me to stay put in Skyhold?"

"No, of course not. Might I suggest Solas and the Iron Bull?"

"Cullen..."

"I don't like forcing this on you either but it is for all our benefits. Apparently, we have to show the nobles that you can be apprehended if need be." Trevelyan considered this carefully. He wasn't in the mood to argue with the Commander and there was reason behind this suggestion but he also had lots of details to sort out. He had hoped to escape from the reality of this absurd situation with doing what he did best. Away from Dorian and Skyhold, he could have rested his mind and just kill demons to relieve his stress. Maybe he would have spent some time collecting herbs and socializing with Blackwall and the rest.

It turns out the advisors had different plans for them. Lucky him... With Solas present there was no way he could relax in his dreams. So sleepless nights awaited him. He was surprised to realize that he didn't mind having the Iron Bull around. Their friendship in his timeline went deeper than had noticed before. The whole issue with the dreadnaught and almost losing the Charger's had a strong impact on their association and although he wasn't regretting saving the Charger's, Trevelyan had feared that the Bull might one day end up being killed by his own countrymen.

No more of that fear, he figured as he heard Dalish's loud exclamations of not being a mage. Besides the Druffalo in the room, he had no issue with Bull's presence in his party.

"The Iron Bull is strong enough handle me on his own, I suppose and Solas can keep an eye on my dreams..." he replied with a defeated tone "Not that I need babysitting but if it's going to put your minds to ease then fine. At least I'll have the chance to curse at you from outside of Skyhold walls."

"Feel free to do so" Cullen smiled sincerely and finished his drink "I should get back to my reports. I have much more to sort out yet the time to leave for the Ball approaches fast. Enjoy your drink."

"Too bad we couldn't finish playing Wicked Grace. Next time?"

"Of course, Trevelyan. Sleep well"

Alone once more with a drink in his hand, Trevelyan wondered if he were ever going to end up as a snivelling alcoholic. It was possible. The circle of life had claimed many victims and blessed a few of them; King's could fall from grace, once upon a heroes could become drunkards and common people could rise to power at any given point in their lives... It was all written right there, in the stories of the extremely unlucky people and those few blissful ones.

Once he had been one of them, one with a promising future as the leader of this elite community and now all that remained was... ah, he didn't want to worry about it anymore. Yes, he hadn't appreciated what he had until he lost it all. So what? Life always had been and would be cruel. He couldn't change the past now. He had to learn to live it which meant that maybe Solas hadn't been so out of line with his presumptuous advices in the Fade.

He didn't want to admit that. He wanted to believe that he had a way out and that his soul was still salvageable. There had to be a future beyond the bottom of this dirty mug. A future where he could learn to trust and care again.

There was still time and reason to hope. Trevelyan didn't find it in his heart to give up on his future nor on the Inquisition. Even if he was stuck there for years to come and had no one but his own sorry self, he would relentlessly fight for them and try to find his happiness. By the end of his fourth glass he simply wished that there was a future for them to have.

 


	11. When the horns cross

* * *

 

The pissing rain did  _wonders_ to Trevelyan's quickly diminishing mood. Each drop was drilling into his head and the salty sea breeze only served to aggravate the motions of his twitching eye. Consequently his sarcasm peaked in parallel to his discomfort and the blunt of it hit Solas and the accompanying scouts. Varric, the smart dwarf that he was, had been following them a few steps behind the group and had dragged the Iron Bull to his side. Trevelyan didn't know what Varric imagined him doing to the Bull, after all their 'first' meeting in Skyhold had gone relatively well.

There had been brief introductions and when a summary of his circumstances was told, it had caused Bull to raise his intact eyebrow before directing a single question at him. "Had you been covering my back?"

"Yes" Trevelyan had answered honestly "Yours and the Charges' both"

"Then keep it up and we'll both survive this!"

Probably due to Varric's interference, other than that brief exchange they've had little interaction. Despite his earlier enthusiasm, Trevelyan could sense Iron Bull's watchful gaze on his back. His  doubt was nothing surprising to Trevelyan; suspicion and mistrust was all he had faced since he opened his eyes in Lavellan's world. He may have been a bit unfair with that thought, but he was in a bad mood.

With gathering his inner strength, he fall back towards the end of the group. Varric sent him an questioning look but he angled his horse so that he would ride between the duo.

"Oh joy..." he heard the dwarf complain before switching to a happier tune "So what brings you to the end of the line, Herald?"

"I thought you were going to start referring me as the Oracle? Did you change your mind already?"

"I'll consider it as soon as I hear back from Bianca."

"Fair enough but I am here to make another premonition. An important one."

"I am giddy with excitement" said Bull and casted a side way glance at Trevelyan who had assumed an uncomfortable position with his shoulders tense and brows knitted together.

"Excitement is  not the word I would use." he muttered with a serious tone "Listen, Bull. Soon you will receive a word from Ben-Hassrath regarding a dreadnaught." He explained the mission they had set out with the Charge's to acquire the dreadnaught and how it went downhill two minutes after they had met with Gat; The Venatori pressuring the Charge's and having to make a choice between them and the dreadnaught. At first the Bull didn't believe that his men had been cornered by a couple of Vints but Trevelyan's scolding face and the stern warning was enough to make him consider the tale to be the truth.

"I am going to double their training sessions" he growled when Trevelyan finished talking "Then we'll see who pressures who..."

"Or rather, take a troop with you when you go to visit this Gat person" Varric's input, as usual was spot on.

"Nah, I'll get them to beat those sorry asses"

"Bull" exclaimed Trevelyan in his Inquisitor voice which startled the Qunari with more surprise than fear. "Do not risk it, this is about their lives. I'll convince the advisors to send more men with you if need be but don't treat this lightly."

"Alright" the Bull responded but Trevelyan couldn't tell if he had agreed for real or mouthed the response just to shut him up. He would have to keep an eye on him.

He shook his head and shared a sort of meaningful glance with Varric. As they approached a clearing with large rocks covering it on three sides he yelled to the group and got of his horse. "Right, this place is good enough to camp" When there was no movement in his peripheral vision he turned around to find hesitant faces, looking at each other with dumbfounded expressions. It took him a second to realize that he, as the new comer, had neither the title nor the status to order them around.

"He is right" chimed in Solas and copied his actions. Upon the confirmation of their designated leader, the scouts began building the tents and avoiding his gaze.

"This is going to be torturous." he complained to no one in particular.

"Old habits, Herald?" asked Varric while mounting Bianca across his back. Trevelyan nodded and adjusted his gloves. The green warm light beneath his left one was shining brightly. A rather nervous looking scout approached him. She looked so transfixed with the dim glow that Trevelyan couldn't help but remove the glove and flex his palm, making the anchor glimmer under the slow rain.

"It is pretty" she commented lightly and he could swear that he heard Solas snort disappointedly beside him. "My apologies, uh... Lord Trevelyan, Ser. Here is your staff, Ser. Commander Cullen had tasked me to lend this to you upon our arrival to the Storm Coast"

"We have been within the boundaries of the Storm Coast for the past half day and now you think to give a staff to me?" She fidgeted in her place, a clear fear reflected with her rigid posture.

"Leave the poor woman be, you bully" said Varric with a half hearted glare and an amused smile "She was tasked with guarding your stick until we reached Long River which is just up ahead. So mission accomplished."

"Oh, sorry. I guess it was pure luck that we didn't run into a demon that wanted to eat us! Thanks for that!" He grabbed the weak staff with more force than necessary. It was a sad and basic staff in his opinion with a wooden grip and an unbalanced hold. It was almost like Cullen had picked it up from a random dead apostate and gifted it to him. "It's not like I require this to protect myself but a tiny bit of trust and respect wouldn't hurt anyone"

"What a charming fellow you are. Must have been a hit with the ladies" said Iron Bull as he laughed at him. "Just observe how hastily she is backing away from you and convince me that you haven't been trying to charm her"

"I am feeling under the weather. Leave it be"

"We noticed, Herald. Perhaps you should work out that tension with more pleasurable pursuits and save some face" Trevelyan openly growled at that. Varric's comment hit closer to home then he liked. The dwarf must have noticed it too because he was both smiling and giving him an apologetic bow.

"I can help with that" Iron Bull added and winked at him. He didn't even have any nerve to comment on that. What he did was to turn towards Solas, who was pouting with a displeased scowl.

"I bet you are now wishing to be in the Imperial Ball, right Solas?"

"I am exactly where I need to be" he replied coolly, with a dash of impatience and Trevelyan's mood improved greatly. "The night is falling, we should rest while we can and continue our journey at first light"

The scouts doubled their effort with the tents and despite having fresh supplies, Trevelyan volunteered to hunt for dinner. He needed to busy his nervous hands and clear his mind. To his surprise Varric armed Bianca and joined him in his hiking path.

"Short height and long range makes for the perfect hunter" he commented cheekily "Besides I spent enough time with Hawke to perfect the art of hiding in the shadows and killing stuff from behind."

"That sounds like a handy talent. My traits are usually limited to shooting lightning at stuff and crisping or freezing them in various degrees."

"You don't do moderations, do you? Any hobbies?"

"Why do you ask that? Are you trying to hook me up with someone?" Varric only shrugged as he climbed up a large rock "Other than killing, I used to enjoy teasing Dorian in my free time. Do you think you can find me a match with these qualities?"

"Let's see. So far, you have shown to be a pyromaniac, an obsessive sweetheart with mood swings matching to that of a morose cat and a sarcastic ass. You can be the next hero in my upcoming novel but I doubt I can convince anyone to fall for you."

"That cut deep, dwarf." Trevelyan feigned having a hurt heart and twirled the staff between his fingers. He could hear the river splashing up ahead "You do have a point though"

"If you agree then start being more sensible and stop scaring the scouts away" The mage was about to retort but Iron Bull's voice cut through the silence like a sharp blade.

"Still haven't gotten anything? Perhaps you should focus on hunting instead of chattering away like mid-wives."

"Sorry" Trevelyan apologised with a reddened face, the small reply was for both Varric and the Bull.

"Quick to flare, quicker to recoil..." Varric whispered. "We can follow the river up. Come on"

The three of them moved in silence and with a strong willed concentration. The river bunk was mostly empty and the few tiny animals they came across scattered upon sensing them. The thin rain kept up and they found themselves moving further away from the camp. Just as he was about to suggest heading back, the Iron Bull called out to him.

"So you and Dorian, hm?" Trevelyan turned around and made a double take back at the sentence he just heard. Or had he been the one to voice it? No, despite his temper, he had more tact than openly direct a  question at his fellow friends. Had he imagined it? That was unlikely since Varric, like him, was staring at the Bull with an honest scandalized expression.

 "Why and how?" asked Trevelyan , very _cleverly_.

"Grim had seen you sucking the soul out of that poor Vint and people think its Tevinter who has all the evil rituals"

"Please don't mock this." Trevelyan replied while hiding his face behind his hands. He had dreaded this kind of a confrontation but the Bull had started it and it was now or never to make some of it right. "I am sorry, alright. I didn't mean to _suck_ his soul out. I knew he was with you yet I went after him anyway. So I apologise."

"Look, Trevelyan. I am telling you to make us even. You seem like a decent man but you are also a dumb shit. Do you really think if Dorian didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be able to stop you from advancing?"

"No, maybe... I felt like I was forcing him to be with me in a moment of his weakness" Trevelyan admitted with a heavy heart and felt Varric's pitying eyes on him.

"That's why I am calling you dumb. With Dorian we shared a good amounts of drinks, a few laughs and more than once, amazing sex. "

"Please stop talking" Trevelyan was close to begging.

"For most of it we had been wasted but Dorian is no innocent damsel. He was with me because he wanted to be with me. I didn't force him. I couldn't have forced him. He made a choice and we had good few runs. So trust me, you didn't take advantage of him. If anything, it could be the other way around"

"It wasn't" Trevelyan finally looked at Iron Bull's steady gaze and saw how the Qunari has been observing his reactions and small ticks as he spoke. Suddenly feeling stripped naked, Trevelyan blinked and looked away as his hands found the comforting chain around his neck. "I care about him"

As if waiting for him to say it, the soft confession made the Bull relax his shoulders and smile gently "So do I."

"How do we solve this then?" Trevelyan asked but he didn't have enough confidence to take him head on. Without a past or anything to offer to Dorian, he felt powerless and undeserving.

"We don't" replied the Qunari with a final certainty "You tell Dorian how you feel. I tell Dorian what I think and we wait for him to make a decision. It is his choice. We don't get to fight nor choose a winner in his place."

If earth could swallow him up and perish his soul, it wouldn't be enough of a punishment. He had been such an ignorant, blighted fool. "You are a better man than all of us combined, Bull."

"Speak for yourself, Herald"

"Right," was all he could say and the Bull's lips stretched into a smug smile as if to dare him to do better. He readily accepted the challenge with a small nod and fierce resolve burning in his soul.

"Now that that's settled" began Varric "Let's try inside that cave. There may be animals hiding from the rain. Actually you know, we don't really need to hunt anything. Shall we return? This place looks like its harbouring giant bears and poisonous spiders"

"Well then I'll shoot at them and then we return" Trevelyan said with a newfound determination but it was short lived as his anchor flared with a force he never felt prior to this and the mark on his hand felt like it was burning its way through his palm. The mage fall on his knees as the anchor lifted his arm towards a green veil which was located deep within the cave and he had to forcefully lift himself up before a searing red claw embedded itself into the earth he had been standing on.


	12. At the edge of reality

* * *

 

"Shit, shit" swore Varric and mirrored Trevelyan's exact thoughts. He struggled to get up as his back hit the wet soil. It had been so long since he had a proper exercise. Although the counter attacks came out of reflex and he had both Varric and the Bull covering his back, Trevelyan still staggered as the pain in his left hand spread towards his arm.

He gripped his staff and channelled his ice magic. A strong but short lived blizzard hit two rage demons and froze them on their spot long enough for the Bull to shatter them to small pieces. A wisp of an arrow flew by his ear and connected with the terror demon who had been approaching him. Finding an opening thanks to Varric's second attack, Trevelyan jumped out of the way and send a fireball at the enemy. The staff was responding well to him. It wasn't extraordinarily strengthening his attacks but it helped focus his energy quick enough during active combat. Perhaps Cullen hadn't chosen the staff as randomly as he had thought.

Still it could have been a better one. As he waved the staff above his head and gathered arcane energy, he recalled his own staff which he had with him as he entered the Well of Sorrows. It had been a thing of beauty, with veridium steel covered handle and goddess tip, it had been his strongest weapon to date. It was a shame someone in the Inquisition had claimed and disappeared with it when he was locked up. A bolt of lightning fell on the heads of the demons who stood outside the cave and a rogue bolt landed at the tip of his boot. He really should be more careful with using this spell while it insistently rained on them.

Another rage demon and two wraiths fell and Trevelyan was feeling his senses to return to him. He froze a pathway between him and a terror demon and as it lost its balance, Trevelyan was quick to hit it with a fire attack sending it flying backwards. An amused laugh escaped his lips. He loved the most basic magic spells; the ones everyone knew and feared equally. He loved showing the world that yes, he was able to do as they had expected and much more than they could ever imagine. He wasn't a scholar like Dorian and he failed to picture himself doing hours of research locked up in a library. It wasn't in his blood to sit tight and be kind.

He craved the excitement and missed the way a fire spell would leave ashes in its wake with a smoky scent or the way ice would linger on his fingertips after crafting icicles. He was most definitely a battlemage, through and through. If he hadn't been born a mage, he would probably take on swords or something similar, like his siblings had but he couldn't imagine being without his magic. Magic complemented his speed and determination. He would have enough range between the enemies to allow keeping an eye on the whole battle scene without excluding himself from the raging fights as well as helping him protect his party members with rapidly cast barrier spells. All in all, magic was a part of him, he held onto it very dearly.

As the last enemy fell and the rift reformed itself to let out new set of demons, Trevelyan casted a dispel magic on one of them and cancelled its transmission. As he readied his staff, an Arcane horror appeared and he cursed their luck. He should have dispelled that bastard but it was too late.

He angled his staff and tried to freeze the demon but it just shrugged it off as if it was cleaning a thin snow layer from its shoulder. He shouted at the Bull to distract it while Varric warded off the smaller demons and Trevelyan took position behind the Arcane horror. Warning Bull not to keep to close to the demon he focused his energy to his anchor and called upon the power of the rift. A scream tore through the cave and as a giant green orb of pure energy fed on the demons killing most of them and weakening the Arcane Horror. Iron Bull took this opportunity to swing his giant axe onto its skull and combined with Varric's arrows hitting his spine, the demon stood no chance against their combined power.

When the only noise left was the crackling of the destabilized rift, Trevelyan noticed that he was kneeling on the rough earth. The tingling on his left hand had numbed most of his arm and the simple act of lifting it felt too much.

It's not supposed to hurt this much, he thought to himself. The mark occasionally hurt and the breach had worsened it for a time but since he had closed the breach it hadn't acted up. Not like this. Varric's voice echoed from far away and his closed eyes slowly opened to meet his companions'. They looked so scared. Fear and worry mixed within their gazes and Trevelyan found himself being supported by Bull's strong grip on his chest.

His vision was clouded and the cave got darker by the minute but it didn't stop him from moving his shoulder and angling his arm in the general vicinity of the rift.

Varric was still talking, Trevelyan wasn't sure about what. It didn't matter. He had a job and it included this bloody rift. Another scream echoed in the cave and he vaguely recognised his own agonised voice. The crackling noise was lost and the world went mute. As his anchor connected with the rift, his body burned with an energy so foreign and intense that all he managed to do was to grit his teeth and concentrate on the only remaining glow of green which went dark as well as his vision.

*

He was back in Haven, Trevelyan noticed. A white blanket of snow covered their poorly guarded and open fortress. The breach glimmered in the distant with a taunting swirl while he squinted his eyes at it. He tried to shield his eyes but his body felt like it had been crushed by a rock. It was then he realized that he was laying down on the ground in front of the main gate.

He took this as a chance to relax, no worry or fear crossed his mind and the blissful dreamland became an escape from his nightmare of a world. The reality was a distant memory; a trouble he didn't had to deal with while he slept. The sounds returned while he laid there and listened. The bird chirped and people's gossip pick up. His senses returned to him one by one. His vision healed and his hearing cleared while blood returned to his fingers. He wiggled his toes and scraped his nails on the rocky floor. A wetness cleaned his sweaty forehead and he felt refreshed as his lost energy returned back to his body, warming his insides.

Gentle touches prodded him from the other world but he refused to wake up. In this dream there were no responsibilities, no demons as far as he could see and most importantly there was no pain. He felt at ease and free of burdens. He was finally free.

The breach goaded him but he was aware that it had been sealed long ago. This was nothing but an image, a projection of better, dare he say, easier times. Be a good mage, follow the orders, attend the Conclave, survive, close the rifts, save the people, hunt for meat, seal the breach...

No.

He didn't need to do those, he had already finished them. He had done as he was asked and he went as far as he could go. He saved the Wardens and the Empress, he recruited anyone who was worth having, he lead the Inquisition, stopped Samson and then... then he failed. He failed his mission. All those people trusted him and he let them down because of his pride. He should have let Morrigan go forth, should have listened Dorian's pleading. He hadn't and now they were gone and he was alone.

The ground beneath him grew cold and a tear escaped his eye. How could he had done this? How could he have left them to disappear... A grey smoke gathered around him and all he could think was how badly he deserved to drown in it. He closed his eyes and waited for his own descend into despair.

It never came. Instead a flash of blue energy swept across him and the screeching sounds of a demon jolted his body. His eyes flew open. Solas stood a feet away from him. His back was turned on him but Trevelyan could feel the raw anger and disappointment rolling off of his shaking shoulders. The elf didn't face him but he didn't have to either. The dying despair demon was all he needed to see to understand his almost mistake.

"Wake up" hissed Solas and Trevelyan found himself startling awake.

*

"The fuck was that?" Trevelyan screamed and tried to get up but his body resisted him, both by hurting and being held down. Iron Bull came into his vision first and then Varric's worried slightly further away face became less blurred. He bit back a agonizing gasp and regretted holding it in almost instantly. His spine arched with the force of his own muscles contracting and the soles of his naked feet pressed down on the blanket he was lying on.

"Relax" was the order he received from Solas as he appeared above his head. Trevelyan was glad to see him calm and collected once again. He tried to follow the simple instruction but his body was acting like it wasn't connected to his mind. The tremor in his torso scared him shitless but he was unable to stop it. It was only thanks to the grounding feeling he got with Bull holding his chest and Varric grabbing his legs that he didn't lose all control and sense. It hurt everywhere but he was still alive so that was something.

"Do not hold him too tight, Tiny, he needs to breathe too" As the pressure on his chest eased and his body calmed down, he took in shaky, short breaths. His heart was racing. "No, no don't do that, Herald"

"The dwarf  is right, Trevelyan" said Solas, agreeing with Varric without a moment's hesitation and surprising him "Take a breath, hold it four seconds. Good, now let go slowly, calmly. Do it again. Give your body a chance to catch up and settle down" He repeated the action far longer than he noticed and finally he gathered enough air in his lungs to question his friends.

Three sets of eyes glanced between each other; a total of five eyes, he grimly noted. "It's better that you don't recall all of it, Tsion" replied Varric "To summarize, we stopped the demons, you screamed and started glowing with blue weird signs on your head. Then you screamed some more, closed the rift, the blue glows turned red, like you were bleeding and then promptly passed out which was better for all our sakes."

"And? how long was I out?"

"Oh, you weren't just out of it" said Iron Bull as he backed away and made some more room for Trevelyan to breath easily "You weren't moving or even twitching. You barely had a pulse when we brought you back to the camp."

"Sorry about that" he replied weakly as he noticed that he was indeed inside a warm and dry tent. Bull snorted with amusement but Trevelyan could feel the relief behind it too. "That's not all of it though, is it?"

"No, it isn't" It was Solas' turn to explain the situation "You went in a coma of sorts. From what I have seen of your red markings all across your body, it was clear that the Elven wisdom you acquired from the Well of Sorrows had reacted badly with your attempt to close the rift. It is a resonance of your first time interacting with the Well. Possibly, like the Well had attempted to erase the anchor and you along with it when you first assumed it into your body, now the elven magic residing within you is trying to protect you from the excessive Fade energy."

"So I did succeed in taking the Well's wisdom. " Trevelyan said with a surprised expression. He could hear distractive whispers from beyond the tent and had the urge to yell at them to shut up but he held his tongue "So, first my anchor tried to protect me from the elven magic but despite reacting badly they still combined together and now the elven magic is trying to protect me from the Fade? Why? I thought the anchor was of elven origin too, why is it harming me?"

"The orb and its power, the anchor has been corrupted by Corypheus. The Well's ancient magic is trying to purify you but the anchor is permanently attached to your body."

"How come I didn't notice this before?" Trevelyan felt so very tired and the people outside couldn't just shut up. He let out a growl in agony.

"That's simply because you hadn't come across any ancient elven writings or artefacts and the magic laid dormant within you." Solas explained. He was unfazed by Trevelyan's outburst "I believe now the magic has awakened and after this you will begin to feel its power. Whether it consumes you or helps you in your journey, I cannot say but I am certain that should you face another rift and attempt to close it, you will die."

"As charming as ever" Trevelyan mouthed at the grim news, drained of all energy. "Now, not even Leliana can object my wish to visit the temple. Or maybe she still would. They don't need to be bothered with helping the replacement for the anchor after all; not when they got the original one"

"Explain to me again, how Dorian ever found this weak ass mage attractive?" asked Bull with an edge to his voice. Disappointment, it said to Trevelyan.

"Thank you for helping me with the despair demon, Solas. You appeared at an excellent time to fry its ass off"

"I am sorry but I do not follow" Solas replied with a scowl of his brows. Trevelyan narrowed his eyes but the elf was honestly confused. Even Varric lifted an eyebrow at him.

"You mean... it wasn't you who appeared in my dream to fend off the demon? Who was it then?"

"Perhaps, you give your willpower too little credit" Solas said with a mused tone "I never went to sleep while you were unconscious but I am pleased to hear that you had enough inner strength to deal with a danger by yourself."

"You are a dilemma, alright" he heard Iron Bull say but "Right" was all he could muster as a form of reply. He felt tired beyond words and with the immediate danger passed, Trevelyan found himself drifting further away from reality.

"Drink this" Solas commanded as a warm liquid was pressed to his lips. He couldn't even taste the drink but it smelled bitter and Trevelyan made a face with the remaining functioning muscles of his face. "Sleep" was the last thing he heard before he lost all consciousness.

 


	13. Everything is different,

* * *

 

Trevelyan knew that lamenting all alone wasn't going to help anyone, least of all himself. Yet he couldn't help but feel the dread of another failed mission's burden as they neared Skyhold.

After his fall in the Storm Coast, Solas had insisted that they return to their sanctuary where he claimed to be able to research his unique circumstances. Trevelyan knew better, Solas only wanted to ensure he didn't get himself killed with one of his stunts or harm anyone else during and under his careful watch. He got it, really. It was hard to burden the responsibilities of an unknown situation without knowing what to expect out of its outcome. Oh, he knew it very well indeed.

A few faces looked up curiously at their early submission. They weren't expected to be back in a couple of weeks or so. He could already hear the whispers and Iron Bull's growl at anyone close enough to see his teeth.

During their reluctant return journey, Varric had assured him that no one would judge nor condemn them for cutting their trip short. The risk of losing him simply wasn't worth chasing after rifts or so he had said. Trevelyan was glad to hear him say it even if he felt a tang of guilt at disappointing his former soldiers. But to be fully honest he did prefer to return home than be subjected to the blinding pain he had felt.

His dizziness hadn't subsided either. Most of the times, he could catch himself drifting away and stop his slide before he fell down his horse. One time, when they had first started to move, Iron Bull had to steady him as he hadn't even realized that he had been sliding off from the saddle. After that embarrassing moment, he had rode his horse while he leaned forward and centred his balance according to the horse's movements. Had he fallen from that position, he would at least be able to cushion his drop with his good arm.

Solas was silent mostly but he did mention that they needed to stabilize his anchor and the elven magic, somehow. Despite his refusal to swallow pride and accept that Trevelyan had been correct in his hurry to visit the temple, Solas kept a lucid head and Trevelyan somehow knew that the visit to the temple had risen up a few levels on Solas' to do list of priorities. He almost smiled at that. Almost.

When they finally reached the stable and Trevelyan managed to dismount his horse with slow movements and little assistance, he had to take a moment to steady his posture. He knew that he was going to need to hold onto his staff to make it out of there but the burning shame prevented him from moving a muscle.

He pressed his head into his Anderfels mount's mane and found his balance to be grounded as the golden hearted horse didn't make a move to get away from him. The whispers which followed him all the way back, had a tendency to increase exponentially when he specifically tried to block them out. When he had initially realized that the noises were inside his head, Trevelyan had panicked. There had been no forewarning and neither Solas nor Abelas had mentioned the possibility of harbouring a thousand souls within his head. They had said something about the souls of the ancients but Trevelyan hadn't believed the souls residing within the Well to be quite so real.

Believing that he had finally snapped, Trevelyan came clean with their expert mage and to his dismay Solas had waved off his worries, explaining to him that the ancients souls were more than the willpower of the elven folk and it was no surprise that they took a more literal form.

Someone cleared their throat from behind him and Trevelyan reluctantly let go of the animal. Swaying on his spot, he ended up leaning on to his staff and any surface he could find to support his body. Every step was a struggle as the tense muscles ached and his head throbbed with pain.

"You should rest, my friend" Solas said with worry hidden behind a scowl. Trevelyan would have nodded in agreement but just the simple thought of the motion was too much. He resided to blink approvingly instead.

"I'll take him to his chambers" Varric volunteered and had the sense to add "We'll stick to the shadowy paths to avoid any gossip too. Poor Herald suffers enough headaches as it is"

"Much appreciated" came the soft reply from Trevelyan who look like he was sleeping on his feet. "Hey, Solas, do you have more of that potion you had me drink last time? Thanks to it I slept like a log and I don't mind fainting into a dreamless slumber now"

"That was just tea, Herald. Don't worry I have something with a real kick that will knock your knickers out"

"Ok, Varric, whichever works is good enough for me"

*

Varric, true to his word, moved between the shadows like an expert assassin with Trevelyan in tow. They were walking exceptionally slow and the mage couldn't tell whether it was to accommodate him or if it was some secret rogue strategy used for being invisible under the daylight. Either way they made it to his chamber without encountering anyone.

The core people of the Inquisition, namely Lavellan, her advisors and the rest of the heavy hitters had not returned. Hence their return created a bigger impact than any of them expected. Hidden away safely in his room, Trevelyan avoided most of the questions from the people but it took another day for Varric to return with the Iron Bull and a couple of drinks in their hands. By that time Trevelyan had already slept for hours on no end, took a bath, ate two meals in his lonely room, changed into his sleeping garments for the night and was dozing off while reading an old book he had found on his desk.

"Sorry for being late, Trev" to his surprise it was Bull who has spoke to him. "The mage made some serious threats to us both if we hadn't left you to your rest"

"Trev?" he repeated with narrowing his eyes "Is that your nickname for me, Bull? It is a bit uncreative. Even Krem la Creme was better than this"

"It's Krem de la creme." interrupted Iron Bull with a smile.

"I am sure he'll be pleased to hear you correct me on this matter" Trevelyan retorted.

"Don't complain, Herald. It could have been worse" Varric giggled after clicking his mug with the Bull's and Trevelyan's drinks. "And we already had some ale before we came in."

"Why not drink with me, Varric? Am I boring you?" he joked as he took another sip.

"Nothing like that, Herald. Half of the Inquisition team has returned from Orlais. We were simply catching everyone up to speed."

"Oh," Trevelyan said without appearing too happy about it. "Did everything went alright?"

"Well, almost. Apparently Celine was assassinated and Lavellan decided to keep Briala as Gaspard's shadow..."

"That is not really a happy ending is it?" he questioned but he did have a feeling it was going to end up like it. As much as he preferred to play the diplomat, Lavellan was more of an aggressive strategist. It didn't surprise him to hear that she had chosen Gaspard who would provide a stronger army to command.

"It is a good ending" Iron Bull chimed in "Happy is irrelevant during war times"

"Guess you have a point. Was everyone else alright?"

"Nothing to worry about, the only one who sustained injury was you and there wasn't much you can do about it." Varric said as he straightened on his seat. He was waiting for Trevelyan to ask about that person but Trevelyan wasn't going to entertain him. Not tonight.

"Where did the half of them go, then?"

"They had a tip on Samson's location. They went to Emprise du Lion to check it out. They'll be back soon enough. Now more importantly. I have been wondering something; What do those whispers whisper to you, Herald?"

"Complete , half-assed nonsense" the mage replied with creased brows and a wrinkled nose. He was glad for a topic change but he hoped he hadn't made that too obvious. "The noises lack a proper focus and I think when they have an opinion, they sort of say it at the same time without coordinating properly. Right now they are silent and I hope they remain that way."

"And that's why I hate magic" Bull said. He downed his drink and searched for the fourth cup they had brought with them. "All this nonsense about the elves, ancients and shit. You got to let the past be and move on."

"A little too late for that" Trevelyan shook his head and took his time to drink. "I am stuck with them and apparently they hate me as much as I hate them."

"Never mind them" Varric said with a smile and took out a deck of cards from his coat pocket "Let's do something fun for a change. If you have money to lose, I suggest Wicked Grace!"

"I'm in." chipped in the Bull and dragged his chair towards the other edge of the bed. Trevelyan shrugged half-heartedly and grabbed his set of cards. Satisfied with their interest in participation, Varric lifted his ale and clinked it with the others' tankards.

They continued their game until one by one their heads started to fall down and the mage declared himself officially too tired to differentiate apart the numbers on the cards. It had been a fun night which reminded him of the good old days and when his head hit the pillow, he instantly fall asleep with a dissipating headache and a dull ache in his left arm.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Originally Iron Bull was going to have a race specific romance option, only. This was due to his bigger and bulkier design. During the extended year they managed to fix this issue and the more I find out about what the developers did during that extra 1 year, the more I become glad that they worked to make the game bigger and better; Like the Bull.


	14. The second time around

* * *

 

Late in the night, before the first light had appeared, Trevelyan felt cold fingers sliding his undershirt and touching his exposed skin; A gentle fingertip ghosted over his collarbone and fiddled with the golden chain of his amulet. An unconscious, hot breath was exhaled on the side of his neck. When the fingers worked around the chain in an attempt to slide it over his head, Trevelyan opened his eyes to come face to face with two beautiful grey eyes. Dorian stood just above him with his hands frozen on Trevelyan's chest.

Unfocused and still half asleep, Trevelyan smiled "Good morning, love. A bit early for you to be already up, isn't it?"

"Ugh" came the _dignified_ response and suddenly Trevelyan lost the warmth emanating from Dorian as the young mage quickly pulled away from him. In two strides, he had crossed the room and stood at the furthest place from the confused Trevelyan. It took a couple more seconds for him to recognise the small room and comprehend the situation he just put Dorian in.

"Sorry, I didn't mean-"

"It's alright" Dorian replied all too hurriedly and had to clear his throat before continuing. Trevelyan couldn't make out his face while he stood at the darkest corner of the room but he was certain that Dorian was blushing with different shades of red adorning his cheekbones.

As the world around him focused, Dorian's velvety voice echoed within Trevelyan's head. With straightening into a more socially acceptable position, he gestured the young mage to take a seat across from him. Dorian ignored the gesture and kept to his corner "Oh, you aren't going to chase me out or run away yourself? There is yet some hope for you."

"Good morning to you too." Trevelyan said with a mock hurt expression, trying desperately to hide his own embarrassment "I am a civil person you know. Wasn't raised in a barn"

"So you say." He heard Dorian take a deep breath and gave him time to regroup his thoughts. After shuffling about and deciding lean on the wall, Dorian sighed in defeat "I suppose it never was a secret that you and me from your time had a thing going on. I just had not understood how serious that thing had been."

"What are you- oh, the birthright" Trevelyan exclaimed with a sudden realization and his hand instinctively curled over the amulet hanging from his neck.

"I assume that the me in your time had gifted it to you or was it you who stole it?"

"Don't be ridiculous" Trevelyan laughed at that and waved a hand "as if I could steal anything from you without having my eyebrows burnt off. No, you lent it to me for luck and protection"

"Fat load of good it did" Dorian said seriously "But that's the Pavus birthright for you, always cursing the possessor whether they be of the family or not."

"Oh, I don't know. I don't think it did such a bad job. I mean I am here, you are here and we are alive. There are worse situation I can imagine to be in"

"You _are_ dying" Dorian deadpanned and Trevelyan had enough shame to avert his eyes with a sad impression on his face.  He gulped down thickly unable to form a retort or a lie fast enough. "Solas was right then. The elven markings and the anchor are actively trying to one up each other. Yet nobody asks, what will became of the bearer of them both?"

"There is still hope" Trevelyan said with a certainty that even surprised himself. He honestly had faith that there was a way to make it right and if they were going to discover it, he wanted to have Dorian's support the most "If there is anyone who knows about this, it is Abelas. We'll figure it out once we reach the temple."

"An optimist! What a rare breed you are."

"So I've been told" As the young mage fidgeted at the end of his bed, Trevelyan crossed his legs on top of each other under the blanket and patted the emptied area for Dorian to sit on. There was little hesitation in following the request this time but Dorian still sat on the edge of bed with the demeanour of a man who was going to bolt out of the room any given second.

"Relax. I am not going to jump on you. I'd at least give you a heads up before I do."

"Much reassuring but that is not why I am nervous" Trevelyan nodded his head. Not that he understood what the young man meant yet there was something odd in the way he held his posture. If he were with his own Dorian, Trevelyan wouldn't hesitate to grab him by the waist and pull him flush against his chest, placing kisses on that naked shoulder until they both fall asleep. He would have erased Dorian's troubles even if momentarily and eased his mind. He couldn't do that now, and that both pissed him off and physically hurt his heart.

When Dorian spoke after a long time of speculations, his voice was wistful yet his words were as random as it could get. "For someone who had mocked my continuous presence in the tavern, I find it rather ironic to see you surrounded with so many empty tankards. I must admit it's both admirable and worrisome to see four of them on your bed table."

"I swear I had company at some point." He showed the cards and his remaining coins laying on the table "What brings you here tonight, Dorian? You seem distracted enough"

"You" Hope bubbled in Trevelyan's chest and he had to physically press it down before his heart attempted to fly off on his own. He really needed to ensure that he wasn't misreading the twinkle suddenly appearing in Dorian's eyes. He opened his mouth but no voice came out. "And that birthright as you might have guessed"

"I see"

"Well, I don't" he snapped, jolting the bed with suddenly turning his upper body towards Trevelyan "Explain to me. I dislike not understanding things especially if they include me"

"I know, Dorian but I am not sure how to. Are you even certain you want to hear it?"

"Try me" he insisted but the Herald wasn't convinced.

"Will you promise me that you won't run away? Make excuses to avoid me?"

"That's you" Dorian's voice was cracked but exasperated at the same time "That is literally what you do when you don't want to hear a reply you may not like. I am not the one running away, Tsion."

Trevelyan crossed his arms across his chest while frowning and rolled his eyes at the young mage "I- yes, maybe I do that, sometimes..."

"Right, _sometimes_..." Trevelyan saw Dorian take a shuddering breath like he was barely holding back from yelling at him. He decided to play it safe and smart and he waited for him "You are a cruel man, you know. You barge into our already chaotic lives and rise more questions than you can answer. From time to time I feel like you are mocking us"

"Dorian, I-"

"No, let me finish." The respectable member of the Pavus family and an Altus mage persona emerged as Dorian hushed the man with great ease. His edgy voice gained a harshness which hadn't been directed at him before and all Trevelyan could do was to swallow. He didn't dare interrupting him again.

"You demand respect" Dorian said accusingly "And perhaps you even deserve it. I can see how that would work if it is you. I truly can because you have the bearings of a great man and the same reputable aura as our Lavellan. I believe your claims to be an Inquisitor. You are strong, forward and determined. I know this because I have been watching you, all of us have, and we are both surprised and pleased with you. When I met with Varric and Bull in the tavern, they told me of your strong will with which you closed a rift even if it risked your life. " Trevelyan's lips twitched upwards at the back handed compliment and fought another urge to reach out to Dorian but he could see from the way the young mage's shoulders shaking that he wasn't done talking.

"These are all commendable traits of a person I would respect and follow. I could imagine myself as one of your companions in this regard. But, but then you demand love. You ask for it as if refusal is not even part of the equation or that it is your right. I want to deny it and move on with my life and, you sit there staring at me with those calf eyes. You haven't earned my love yet I find myself willing to share it anyway."

"Dorian..."

"Hush!" He finally got up from his seat and started to properly fidget as he paced the room with his arms flailing and head swarming with many thoughts. He appeared so frustrated and all Trevelyan wanted to do was to run to Dorian and cradle him in his arms until he calmed down. "I can't do this, Tsion. I can't accept this. I don't even know you and I also know everything about you. I have read your reports and every bit of information Lady Leliana gathered from the rest of us. You are an enigma, an unknown. Possibly very dangerous, too."

"Dangerous how, Dorian? I have already proven to be the Inquisitor. Is it because I have no name or no past in this world?" He halted his pacing and focused his gaze at Trevelyan.

"It is dangerous because you are dying. It is dangerous because if I let myself fall for you, there is a good chance that you won't be around to see my heart shatter and I'll be left alone with my suffering." The trickle of a tear was enough to get Trevelyan moving. The pain in his muscles acted up when he tried to move too fast and although he couldn't do much but crawl to the edge of the bed, he still managed to reach out to Dorian. Hesitant fingers wrapped around his forearm and he pulled the young man down on to the bed. His arms wrapped themselves around Dorian's waist and the mage's fingers found a strong hold on his biceps. With his single knee propped up and supporting Dorian's back, Trevelyan hugged him with all the strength he could muster.

"Why are you dying? Who gave you the right to waltz into my life, confuse the shit out of me, complicate a perfectly adequate arrangement I had with a qunari and insist that I reconsider every choice I have made since joining the Inquisition; Just so that you would end up dead? How dare you?"

"I am sorry, Dorian. I didn't know it would be this way. If I had known that this was a possibility, I would never have come after you. I wouldn't have hurt you but giving _you_ up is not in my nature. I could drop everything at a seconds notice, the Inquisition, the anchor and the rest of the world but you, I would always come for you, regardless of our positions or our destinies."

"This is not comforting. You would put me above your duties?" The young mage said as he hid his face in the crook of Trevelyan's neck. Dorian's warm breath on his skin and their close proximity sent shivers down Trevelyan's spine and he responded with snuggling in closer.

"When I look back to how things have turned out, I wish that I had done it in the first place. I remember it clearly, as we stood at the edge of the Well of Sorrows, you told me 'I don't want to lose you to a well' and I ignored your warning. If I had just listened to you, we would not be going through this."

"You can't reply the past but you can redeem it. That's what you have been doing and surely you have saved so many more this time around. You claim to be selfish yet just hearing about your actions in Storm Coast is enough to convince people otherwise. I believe when you chose to drink from the Well, it was in the best interest for everyone involved. So the real questions is" Dorian's fingers slipped below the chain of the birthright and slowly caressed its surface while his fingertips brushed over Trevelyan's chest. "how did I end up caring for such a noble hearted man and even convince him to reciprocate my feelings?"

"In any given world, you are a master of seduction and I was taken in with you the moment I first laid my eyes on you. That might have helped"

"As I said, you are such a cruel man." Trevelyan snorted and planted a tender kiss on the young man's exposed nape. Sitting together, all wrapped around each other, Trevelyan felt peaceful despite the dull ache starting up in his arm. He ignored it as Dorian grasped his shirt and nuzzled his head on his shoulder "I will admit that you know how to render me speechless. Care to... show me your techniques?"

Trevelyan's hands halted to a stop at the given request and he lifted his lust filled eyes to stare directly into Dorian's over blown gaze. There was no mistaking the intension behind the unexpected question and Trevelyan felt a tug in his chest. How long had he waited for this; for Dorian to come to him and offer him that unconditional heart? How badly had he wished to be able to hold him without the fear of rejection? And here it was, the sweet breath whispering and presenting him the only world he ever wanted to have.

"Show me what it feels like," Dorian murmured as his lips traced a thin scar on Trevelyan's cheek "kiss me like you would kiss the me in your timeline. Allow me to understand it and treat me like an equal." He surged forward to taste the inviting mouth in front of him but Trevelyan gently grasped his chin and stopped his advance while swiping a thumb across his lower lip. Only a breath separated them and one of them made a primal sound at the back of their throat, though Dorian couldn't distinguish to whom it belonged. Probably to both of them.

"You are more than a reflection in the well, love" Trevelyan spoke slowly and clearly. The doubt behind Dorian's words made him hesitate. He was barely holding back from surging forward but he had to make sure that Dorian didn't think that this was a fleeting feeling. "You are not the one I left behind. I see now that you have always been just yourself and I should have treated you as such. I imposed on you to be someone else, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did. Not that I am complaining about it at this point."

"I apologise. I'll try to make it up to you" Trevelyan said and hoisted the mage by the waist. Ignoring the surprised yelp from the younger mage, he twisted around and draped Dorian on the bed. One of his legs rested between Dorian's while his elbows on the mattress supported his upper body so that there was a small distance left between their bodies.

"You better make it up to me" Dorian said "And you better stick around for what comes after too"

"I will" Trevelyan replied with great conviction and at long last he lowered his body and captured Dorian's lips with his own. He felt the tension melting away between them the moment he angled his head to deepened the kiss. His marked hand found purchase on the short hair and the other one messaged the back of the long neck, eliciting a deep moan from the young man.

Slow and steady, Trevelyan pried open the eager mouth with his tongue. Dorian was quick to take control when their tongues met but he wasn't about to let Dorian hasten this moment. So he pulled back ever so little, causing his partner to rise up after him and instead of meeting him half way through, Trevelyan bit at Dorian's chin and pressed demanding kisses along his neck.

"No need to rush, Dorian." he whispered and felt a tug on his half open shirt. Sneaky fingers found their way to his abdomen and scratched his skin, almost making him laugh.

"Why are you in such a good shape?" he heard Dorian complain "Muscles on a mage; for whatever reason do you need them for?"

"I _am_ a battlemage, you know. Also my previous partner was very demanding and competitive when it came to bedroom activities. I had to keep up with him."

"Smart man, he was. I approve"

"I am glad" Trevelyan beamed at the mage and Dorian smiled fondly before reaching for his neck and pulling him down to capture the glistening mouth. What a strange and charming man, Dorian thought to himself. Kissing him like it was the only way to breathe, like the tomorrow would never come. There was no rush movements, no attempt to free him from his garments and not even a single, out of control touch. Dorian both applauded the man for his self-restrain and vowed to make him lose his precious control. He was going to speed things up, move his hands southward and explore the rough body above him but then Trevelyan parted his legs with his own and his lips found Dorian's pulse under his chin. When he got up, with the kind of soft touch on his lips and the way he poured his very essence through their current kiss made him reconsider moving at all, lest they lost the moment.

He found the whole giving yourself to someone aspect to be exhilarating. It also begged a new set of questions that Dorian wasn't willing to consider at the moment. To his delight, Trevelyan must have thought so too because once he realized that Dorian was becoming more dormant, he manoeuvred them so that his legs were wrapped around his own. A moan escaped through Dorian's his lips as their bodies were flushed against each other. When he had enough of playing the coy partner and reached for him, Trevelyan met him half way through, licking at his lips and then sucking on his tongue. He seemed to know exactly what Dorian liked.

He shuddered when Trevelyan pulled away with a glint in his eyes and a grin forming on his mouth. His hair was ruffled and Dorian was convinced that he could stare at this gorgeous man for an eternity. The him in the other timeline had been a lucky bastard, indeed.

"So, did I satisfy your curiosity?" Trevelyan inquired.

"My curiosity is only peaked along with other things..." he replied and smirked as he observed Trevelyan to gulp down with great difficulty. "I wonder how different your _techniques_ would be with even less clothes and more sweat"

"I would love to make a demonstration but I am afraid we'll have to wait for a while longer"

"And why is that?" Dorian asked, slightly disappointed.

"Because I can't really feel my left side" Trevelyan said with a groan and fell on top of the young mage. Dorian who never before panicked in his life, screeched and shoot his arms out to grab the falling man. He turned them as gently as he could and placed the pillow under Trevelyan's head. His marked hand fall limply to his side which worried Dorian further more.

"Where on the left side? Why didn't you say something before you daft man!"

"It's fine" Trevelyan responded with a huff.

"I'll go get a healer" Dorian yelled as he got up. He drew the blankets over Trevelyan after gathering them from beneath him who held on to Dorian with his right hand.

"It happened on the road as well. Don't worry. Just get me the medicine from my bag" Dorian dived for the bag standing on the other side of the bed table and opened it with an unrestrained strength that Trevelyan thought he was going to rip it. " Solas procured the ingredients while I was laying unconscious in the camp which I have been doing a lot lately. Laying unconscious, I mean, not camping. It has a bitter smell but it works wonders for the pain. No idea what it has in it though."

"Yes, that's very kind of him. Is this what I am searching for?" Dorian lifted up a small bag of combined herb leaves and when Trevelyan nodded, he grabbed a tankard, emptied it and filled it with a handful of herbs and some water.  

"Let it rest for half a minute" warned Trevelyan.

"You should have told me this was a possibility and I wouldn't have pushed you so hard"

"I was busy seducing you" Trevelyan laughed "Mentioning that my arm is falling asleep isn't exactly romantic. Either way, thank you for the assistance. This would have been impossible to do on my own." Dorian sighed sadly. He seemed like he wanted to protest to his words but instead he wrapped his arms around Trevelyan's torso and helped move him into a position where he could drink his medicine without drowning on it. With a sad note he also noticed that Trevelyan couldn't move most of his left leg either.

"Then, I am glad to have helped." he muttered and lent the tankard to Trevelyan's right hand. "Next time you let me know if something doesn't feel right, yes? Assuming there is a next time of course"

"Yes, of course" Trevelyan replied without taking his eyes off of Dorian's making the young mage squirm delightfully. The cold, medicinal tea still tasted like nothing and the smell of it was like rotten citrus but at least Trevelyan could enjoy having Dorian's company.

Warmth returned to his fingers and his blood was flowing in his veins with great ease. A tingling sensation passed over his arm and leg, like pins and needles were being prickled under his skin. His heart rate made an attempt to increase but Dorian's tentative hold on his leg grounded him. Gradually the prickling feeling subsided. Once the tea was finished he flexed his arm and made a show of using his muscles while yawning.

"See, all better. I told-" Dorian cut him off with a quick kiss to his temple, startling him into silence.

"Yes, yes... You just cut down a few years off of my already short life expectancy. I hope you are happy. Now lay back and rest. I will not have you die on my watch"

"Alright, sleep by my side?" Trevelyan asked as he slipped under the covers and slid over with slow movements to make room for the young mage, should he chose to accept his offer. Dorian seemed hesitant but Trevelyan lifted the blanket for him anyway.

"You are impossible" he let out finally and went to remove his boots and upper garment. He returned only wearing his trousers. "I am keeping them on. You are unreliable when it comes to self-discipline. One of us has to hold back"

"No, I am not. I have been holding back since I first came in here and you didn't make my life any easier. But it is fine by me. Not like I haven't already seen what's underneath" Trevelyan retorted as Dorian joined him on the bed. He wiggled as close to Dorian as possible without making him uncomfortable. The warmth he felt was enough for him to feel content.

 "You just keep breathing slowly and remember your promise, yes?"

"Yeah. Good night"

"Sleep well, Tsion" Dorian said sleepily, unaware of Trevelyan's eyes remaining open for the next hour as the pain continued to trickle his arm. When the medicine finally took effect and he started to nod off, the sun had already risen over Skyhold.

 


	15. The calm before the storm part 1

* * *

 

Dorian woke up to find a heavy body lying half on top of him. An arm was thrown over him which was dangling from his side of the bed and a deep breathing cycle was puffing on to his neck, just below his ear. He lifted his free hand and made a feeble effort to push the dead weight back to his own side. The breathing on his neck hitched for a second, the body wiggled and a leg was wrapped around his own, effectively trapping him even more so than before. He felt like he was in quick sand, the more he fiddled to get out, the stronger the hold on him became.

Finally he cracked open an eye and wasn't surprised to find Trevelyan's resting face and half open mouth an inch away from his head. He looked kind of adorable, Dorian thought but also extremely and very treacherously close to him. Almost as if he was mocking him with what he couldn't have even while he slept.

A horn blew, its screeching noise alerting the people of Skyhold of the lunch hour. He could hear the commotion and the footsteps as people moved from their stations and rooms to get to the dining hall. His own stomach growled at the idea of food but he didn't find it in his heart to wake Trevelyan. Gently he leaned his forehead and touched Trevelyan's, listening to the gentle snoring. It was funny to imagine an Inquisitor while he was snoring, completely passed out and unaware of the world. Yet there he was, snuggling Dorian with a death grip and he felt at peace. Maybe, just maybe being with Trevelyan wasn't such a terrible idea.

The simple way Trevelyan had been looking at him or how he never took off the birthright amulet told Dorian a lot about his loyalty but he didn't feel as confident as the sleeping man. Despite having met someone who lived through it, the future still remained an unknown. How different the Dorian of Trevelyan's time had been, how in the world had they ended up together? He with the Inquisitor... The gossip alone should have been enough to drive the mage away. Yet, he didn't act like it did.

Dorian hadn't felt like Trevelyan had been keeping them a secret. The man wasn't even capable of hiding his emotions when they first met down in the dungeons. He had been calling out to him which had earned Dorian a scowl and an unwarranted interrogation from Leliana and Solas, both and on separate times. That hadn't been nice. Of course, curiosity kills the cat and Dorian had found his way down to the dungeons fast enough to question this mysterious man for himself. With what he had found, he had been pleasantly surprised; The longing and fear of losing something and the wretched hope blooming in his face had been all too real for Dorian to ignore.

From then on, as the speculations in his head and on the tongues of the rest of the Inquisition, Dorian had started to probe and prod anyone and everyone for answers. Solas had gotten fed up with him first and came clean with his theories and possibilities probably just to shut him up. In the retrospect though Dorian's and the elf's arguments and discussions had led them to the definitive conclusion; Yes, Tsion Trevelyan was indeed an Inquisitor of another timeline. To say that the result had gobsmacked Dorian would have been an understatement. The golden goose of a life time had presented itself in their doorsteps and Dorian's researcher persona had been way too intrigued with the possibilities that this odd man had presented before them.

The events happened afterwards had been unpredictable but somehow most welcome. This Inquisitor of another time had charmed his way into his heart and Dorian was suddenly being pulled into his orbit by an unknown force or like a desire demon offering this enchanting man to him in exchange for his sanity. Either way he didn't mind.

His only real concern had been the Iron Bull. The qunari wasn't the most sensitive man around but they had started something. Whatever they may have named it, it was an almost-something and actually made Dorian consider his choices with a diligent mind. The Imperial Ball had been a fantastic diversion for him to take a break from seeing both men and focus on what he wanted, as usual. Seeing Lavellan and Cullen flirting their way through the Ball had been adorable enough and observing Josephine and Blackwall enjoying each other's company in the most respectable way had been a nice change compared to his mess of a love life. But both examples had made him realize that what he wanted laid beyond a few stolen kisses and was more bordering on being cared for and adored for an eternity.

He had no doubt, given time their relationship with the Bull could have evolved and in another time maybe even form a more solid _something_ but in this one, the timeline with the ever so breathtaking Trevelyan and his never ending, timeline skipping and unconditional love, Dorian found himself falling fast and hard. This didn't bode well for him. Especially considering the pending doom which was fast approaching for them both.

A soft knock on the door disrupted his line of thought and Trevelyan grumbled like a cat. Confusing the complaint for an invitation to enter, the poor sod who opened the door almost dropped his tray dish upon seeing the two of them in such a cosy position. "Excuse me, Ser" he stammered and put the tray down on to the desk with utmost care. Trevelyan grumbled some more, hiding his face from the sun light entering through the door. The young boy took his queue and bolted for the exit but instead of leaving he turned to Dorian with a sheepish smile.

"Would like me to bring you a dish, as well, Master Pavus?"

"That would have been very kind of you but I rather eat at the dining hall."

"Of course, Ser"

Once they were on their own again, Trevelyan spoke into his ear with dissatisfaction dripping from his words "You prefer to eat away from me while I am left all alone in this room, Master Pavus? I am wounded"

"Well, you didn't seem like you were ever going to wake up or let me up so why waste more good food?"

"I am up now. Do you want to leave?" Something behind his voice made Dorian pause and he shook his head as a no. "Let's sleep some more then, shall we?"

"No, you should eat some lunch. You are wasting away" Dorian replied and lifted the heavy arm. Trevelyan complied with his request and retreated backwards to make way for the mage  to get up. With the curtains drawn back, his eyes roamed over Dorian's well defined back as the sun light shone on his perfect skin.

"I am not really hungry. We can share if you want. After all your stomach was singing a new tune all on its own."

"It's your fault for hugging and incapacitating me like an overgrown ivy. When was the last time you ate anything? And ale doesn't count."

"Yesterday's supper, I think" Trevelyan replied and decided to help the mage with taking the empty tankards left on the bed table. He balanced his body on his two feet which was more tiring than he realized and put the items on his desk as Dorian dropped the tray on his bed table. "I am fairly certain I should be able to walk without the risk of tripping over."

"Maybe you should try filling your stomach with actual food. I hear it does wonders for the weakened muscles." Trevelyan smiled at that and took his place back on the bed while Dorian opted to pull a chair by his bedside. "Here, eat the stew. I'll be having the soup if you don't mind. I don't understand how you southerners can stomach that garbage dunked in oil and live long enough to tell the tale."

"We have had worse in the Circle and this is pretty decent in comparison to what we usually have on the road."

"I worry about your lot. Life isn't easy around here, is it?" the young mage said and took a spoonful of his meal after making sure that Trevelyan was eating too.

"No, but it is slightly better now" If Dorian had blushed, it wasn't because of the sudden admission but rather because of the sun dancing on his back.

"So," he started hoping to distract Trevelyan who had paused eating was staring at him with a different sort of interest. "Tell me about your life, back in your timeline. How was the life in the circle and so on."

"Not much to tell, I suppose" Trevelyan resumed his meal while he spoke "I hear the events has been too much alike. Same reasons to fight and to rebel..."

As Trevelyan finished delving into his own past, Dorian drank the last sips of his soup and cleaned his mouth with the tissue provided. He put his own plate away, on side of Trevelyan's half eaten stew plate. He didn't comment on it but as he left the tray on the bed table in case he wanted to finish it later.

"As much as I enjoy our conversations" he began while he dressed "I should let you rest some more. In the mean time I'll snoop around and see what the next course of trouble awaits us." Trevelyan nodded and without rising a complaint he laid back down on the bed, his eyes closing almost immediately. "I'll prepare and leave the medicinal tea by your side, Tsion. Drink it if need be."

"Okay" the mage mumbled back and smiled sleepily "I like it when you use my name, you know. It somehow sounds different coming from you"

"Is that so, Tsion. I might just begin using it more often then" he joked and earned a chuckle in return "Now, rest and do try not to die in my absence"

*

The corridor outside was mostly deserted as he got out of the room in utmost silence. A slow tug and the door creaked closed without disturbing Trevelyan inside. It really wasn't fair then when a gruffly voice snorted behind him and scared  him half to death.

"How has your day been, Vint?" teased the Iron Bull from where he was leaning on the stone wall.

"Did you just dissipate out of nowhere? I didn't know warriors possessed such abilities" he responded with as little bite to it as possible. "I have been alright, mostly but I can't say the same for our Herald dearest" Bull frowned and started following Dorian as he walked towards Cullen's office. The sun was up but the mountain breeze was blowing mercilessly which helped clear Dorian's mind.

"What's wrong with Trev?" Bull inquired and Dorian tried not to roll his eyes at the nickname.

"What isn't wrong? He is constantly tired, he isn't eating properly and despite all those muscles he seem to have, he occasionally loses his ability to even lift an arm."

"Shit, it wasn't this bad when we left the Storm Coast. He seems to be degrading instead of healing. Anything you can do about it?" Dorian sighed and shook his head.

"Solas left some medicine for him but I believe it's only a temporary solution. I honestly don't know what else to do for him."

"You know what to do" the Iron Bull said with a definitive tone "You are doing it, Dorian and it is helping him"

"Are you- did you...?"

"Yes, I did, Vint. Look, I may have one functioning eye but I am not blind, ok? I can see that you are good for him and somehow he seems to be good for you. I mean, you haven't even insulted anyone since he turned up. It's an improvement. People might actually start liking you"

"A servant boy offered to bring me lunch today and had I accepted it, I am positive that it would have arrived without a drop of spit in it"

"You see! Improvements" the Iron Bull laughed heartedly "We had our fun, Vint and as much as I enjoyed having you burn half my drapes, I think it's time to move on to more serious relationships"

"Hold your horns, Qunari! No one said anything about a relationship." Dorian squeaked and stopped in front of Cullen's door.

"Not yet but you have been thinking about it."

"I- We shall see, assuming that he even survives the next few days."

"He will. Trev's strong and more than capable of kicking death in the ass. Perhaps you should prepare yourself in the mean time, Dorian. That boy's serious about you."

"Thank you for your _invaluable_ input, Bull. May I have a word with our Commander while you finish your snickering?"

"After you, Vint"

 


	16. The calm before the storm part 2

* * *

 

"So apparently, I am terrible at keeping my facial expressions in check which is ridiculous because I cannot be terrible at anything, period!" Dorian stormed in through Trevelyan's door, expecting to find the man either asleep or tiredly reading a book. What he didn't expect was to find Cole, Josephine and Varric sitting around his bed and playing a hand of Wicked Grace with an overexcited Trevelyan slamming his cards down happily. "So sorry to interrupt your game"

"It's alright, I was just busy sweeping their coins" The mage replied. Dorian narrowed his eyes at Josephine who looked innocent enough but he knew better that if Trevelyan was winning it was because they let him.

"Sounds fun" Dorian nodded "Have you been informed of our next mission?"

"Yes, the Herald is up to date and we'll leave for the Temple of Mythal tomorrow with the first light." answered Varric and started shuffling the deck. "What's this about you being terrible?"

"I am not. That's it"

"Of course not, Master Pavus" Josephine said as she got up from her seat "It's getting late and it will be a long journey. We should leave you to your rest. Lord Trevelyan, Master Pavus"

"Well, Ruffles got a point. I am going to turn in early myself. So don't stay up too late, boys.

"Oh don't forget about Cassandra's book, Varric" Trevelyan called after him. "She will be thrilled about it!

"Wouldn't dream of disappointing my fans, Herald. Come on, Cole."

"Good night, _Varric_ " growled Dorian. Before joining in with the other two at the door, Cole leaned towards Trevelyan suspiciously whispering at him. "You are being protected" was all he heard as he approached them.

He saw Cole to the door as well. As Cole slightly bowed and both Varric and Josephine winked at him, he forced a smile and closed the door, short of slamming it. He wasn't pleased to hear their giggling sounds from beyond the door. "Everyone is in such good moods. It's almost as if we are simply going for a stroll through the wondrous Arbor Wilds and not in search of a mythical Well to cure you of your death sentence."

"Dorian" Trevelyan mused with a small smile playing on his lips. He approached the bed with a straight back and crossed his arms. He noticed that Trevelyan had a fresh tunic on and his hair was glistening with wetness. He had a eased up posture and unlike how Dorian had left him in the afternoon, he looked positively refreshed and healthy. It was a small blessing that the man was feeling good before they set out on another journey.

"Let me guess what you are going to say; you are fine and everything is going to be alright?"

"Yes, it will be" With the ease Trevelyan had said it, Dorian almost believed him.

"Who am I to disagree with the second great Herald and the Oracle of all Thedas" he countered and went to draw the curtains to a close, shutting off the last rays of the day.

"Maker! Is that really catching up?"

"For your reputation's sake, I hope not."

Trevelyan lit the candle on his bedside with a flicker of his finger and along with the anchors green glow all that visible remained was that tiny candle light between them.

There was a minute silence as Dorian didn't know what to do with himself. He considered leaving for his own chambers but he had already packed and didn't have much to do but to sleep. He also didn't want to leave Trevelyan alone. The tea he had left had been finished and honestly Trevelyan looked a little lost sitting in that big bed, all alone.

Dorian didn't really need any other motive or convincing to strode towards the tense man, grasping a handful of his wet hair and capturing his lips as he climbed atop of his lap. The kiss was savage. Their teeth grazed each other, someone bit the other's lip and he could taste the blood as it dripped between their mouths. Dorian's arm wrapped itself around Trevelyan's nape and the other one braced the back of his head from hitting the bed frame. His fingers stroked the tense neck until Trevelyan relaxed and moaned into his mouth.

Once he got over his surprise, Trevelyan  reciprocated similarly, quickly his hands started caressing Dorian's back and they dropped lower to cup his ass. He pulled him down towards himself while making a quick work of removing Dorian's boots and throwing them aside without much thought. His buckled top followed soon after. With both legs on either side of Trevelyan's hip, Dorian arched for more contact. He tugged on his tunic demanding it to be removed as well. A groan left his lips and had to part from the delicious mouth beneath him as Trevelyan resumed him ministration on his backside, kneading the muscles and teasing Dorian beyond measure.

He risked a glance at the older man's face. Trevelyan's mouth was slightly ajar with anticipation and his eyes were darkened with lust. Even in dim light, Dorian could see the unreserved desire in them. He supposed his own face reflected a similar need because without a warning Trevelyan pushed him down on the bed.

Dorian was sure he was going to get asked what brought his sudden wild assault on the man but his partner knew better than that to ask since the answer was as grim as the destiny he was to face soon enough.

 "I am here" he said instead "I'll be here next week and the week after that. We have got time, Dorian."

"You keep saying that" he responded with a low voice "but who are you trying to convince?" Trevelyan swallowed. After what felt like an eternity he straddled Dorian's hips, removed his undershirt and revealed a well toned, albeit scarred torso with his birthright hanging over his heart like it has always belonged there. Though what really got him to stare was Trevelyan's left arm. Starting from the mark in his palm a few, vein like green strings were extending towards his elbow while glowing dangerously. Their glow wasn't as strong as the mark but they were noticeable enough in the dark. Dorian couldn't help but wince as he slid his hand up Trevelyan's rapid pulse and felt the warmth emanating from the green veins.

"Tsion, does it hurt now?" he asked.

"No, not since I woke up" Trevelyan answered and sat on his thighs with a sigh.

"The pain seeps  through your sleep?"

"Yes, but it's not constant nor strong enough to disturb me. Small comforts, I guess"

"For now" Dorian added and swallowed thickly. His fingers prodded the green veins, half expecting to hear a cry but all he achieved was making Trevelyan growl,  lean down and press their lips together with more force than earlier.  

Any other time, Dorian would have countered in a similar fashion, this time though he felt a shift in Trevelyan's movements and only focused on him. The strong almost desperate hold on his hips and the lavishing yet sloppy kisses with teeth biting possessively was so different than the time when Trevelyan first kissed him in front of his door. It spoke of a desperate set of emotions especially when he compared it to Trevelyan's earlier, unrushed ministrations. With a heavy heart he realized that it spoke of fear.

His chest constricted at the revelations but he didn't let that stop him from reaching out and wrapping himself flush against Tsion. A combination of anxiety and need fastened his heart beat and he could also feel Tsion's heart thumping  through his chest, too. A primal need rose inside him. Dorian wanted to strip this gorgeous man naked and touch every part of him. Feel him wither under his touch. Make him come undone with his tongue tracing every bit he could reach. This wasn't about him though, not at that moment. He never wanted anyone like he wanted Trevelyan but he wasn't going to force him to go further than he was able to go.

Dorian wasn't a considerate man but he understood the delicate situation Trevelyan was threading on and just him considering to slow down for his sake showed that maybe the Iron Bull was right after all.

He groaned and Trevelyan halted his lips kissing on the side of his chin. A pair of the finest calf eyes stared at him.

"Not you" Dorian tried to explained "I just had an unsettling thought. You may continue and stop acting so coy. If we had been together before than we must have done much more wicked things than humping like teenagers."

"You have no idea, love." A mischief glint appeared in Trevelyan's eyes and Dorian gulped down eagerly. "Let's get your mind back on track, shall we?"

"Yes, please" he smirked and licked Trevelyan's mouth leisurely, focusing on the small cut on its side. "Sorry about that"

He was disappointed to lose contact when Trevelyan pulled away from him but then hot, swollen lips were on his collarbone, sucking and biting. Dorian was glad to feel him move lower without a pause. The green glow approached his chest and he felt a ticklish touch where the fingers closed around his right nipple. The energy surge from the anchor increased as Trevelyan licked at his other nipple and started sucking the skin around it. All the young mage could do was to clutch onto Trevelyan's hair and hope that the noises being torn from his throat was enough to hurry him up.

Thankfully, the older man had  enough mercy to move on from his abused nipples and continue licking his way towards his abdomen. His left hand moved to slide down his sides, moving faster than his mouth. Trevelyan took his time reaching the waist line of his trousers, kissing and worshipping every inch of skin under him. The trail of wetness he left behind made Dorian shiver and having had enough of the teasing, he pushed his feet under Trevelyan in order to stroke his crotch. It must have succeeded because Trevelyan let out a groan and retaliated with biting at his side. His playful leg was then captured and spread wide as Trevelyan settled even lower between his legs.

"Let me hear you call my name, Dorian" he whispered with a wolfish grin and mouthed the front of his trousers, teeth grazing playfully and hands caressing his buttocks.

"Ah, you need to better than that" came the challenge and a minute later Dorian was already regretting it.

" _Oh_ , do I now?" Trevelyan's left hand moved to where his mouth was and the unnatural warmness caused him to buck his hips forward. "I bet you are dying to lose the trousers. It's only one layer of clothing separating my mouth and your release." His hand pressed down harder and rubbed his member harshly, eliciting another groan. "Do you really prefer playing instead of feeling me take you all in and stroke you until you forget your own name."

"Such a cruel man" Dorian bit down on his lip but another roll of Trevelyan's energy surging anchor and he let a out a strong moan "Tsion!" He received a dark laugh and was rewarded with sudden removal of his belts and trousers, exposing his hardness for Tsion's gaze. Fully naked and awaiting for his next move, Dorian was extremely grateful for when Tsion dropped the pretence and lowered his lips on his shaft.

Closing his mouth around him, Tsion started out with unhurried, deliberately slow licks. As he got faster his fingers continued to touch Dorian's body wherever he could reach. His own breathing got heavier within seconds. Without a warning, he took Dorian's member into his mouth, sliding down in one smooth motion, making the young man let out a cry with Tsion's name on his lips. He buckled his hips up unsuccessfully as Tsion pressed him down with his unyielding hold and increased his movement speed. He fondled and scratched, sending shivers down his spine. With his knees propped on Tsion's shoulders and hands desperately clutching on his hair, Dorian forgot to breath. Tsion swallow his member with a practised ease and he focused all his undivided attention on making him come undone. A curious finger slid down the crack of his ass and Dorian wasn't sure which way to arch his body.

"Tsion" he called instead and rubbed the soft hair "I am close..." Instead of leaving him, Tsion carefully grabbed his hips and Dorian saw his treacherous left hand move between them. The moment the hand closed around him and the strong energy pumped his shaft, spreading a sudden warmth beneath the mouth, Dorian lost his senses. With all his muscles tensing, his climax came in waves, spending him thoroughly.

Tsion only pulled back once Dorian laid back lax and content. His hand still continuing their exploration on Dorian's lower side, he kissed his way back up with a knowing grin and Dorian was more than happy to open his mouth when his tongue demanded entrance and kissed him with the gentle ministrations, he came to associate Tsion with.

The knuckles of his fingers grazed Tsion's lips once they parted and the open adoration he received was enough reason to kiss him again. "Allow me" He whispered seductively as his hand snaked down to rub on the bulge on Tsion's breeches. Turning him around and climbing on top of his thighs Dorian made a show of playing with the laces. "Keeping your breeches on after such an endeavour is considered rude, you know"

"Endeavour, you say? From the way you have been practically singing my name, I would like to think that was more than just that." Tsion leered and Dorian's own lips stretched into a sly smile.

"Yes, but let me show you how it is done without cheating with that anchor of yours, Herald. Then we'll see who triumphs."

 "Do your worse, love"

"Oh, but I intent to do much more than that"

 


	17. Into the wilderness

* * *

 

If Trevelyan had to summarize their journey to the Arbor Wilds, the words he would use would be the sort to be frowned upon by Mother Giselle. Though it didn't stop him from muttering them under his breath as he rode his mount as fast as possible while trying desperately to avoid getting hit by a storm of flying arrows. It was more difficult than he remembered as he ducked and jumped off of the twigs and roots that cut his path.

The giant trees with their large trunks and many branches hid the Sentinels away and Trevelyan made sure to steer clear of them as he dropped near the river and followed it up. He could hear the rest of his party just up ahead.

He only slowed down when he saw Cullen's mane like armour and his raised sword. The troops of the Inquisition had marched for the Arbor Wilds before the sun was up with their commander heading them. So far they had done a good job of keeping the sentinels away but then Samson and his soldiers had appeared, erasing almost any time they could have gained from their surprise march on the wilderness.

 A second group involving Lavellan's inner circle had followed the troops soon after and helped clear the road in advance for Trevelyan and his current companions. He had appreciated the gesture since his left side was steadily losing its senses, with or without Solas' medicine.

"Herald!" Cullen yelled towards him as he dismounted his horse "It's good to see that you made it here. Samson's men are blocking the way, we'll need to clear them out before I can let you go forward."

"Is there any way to pass by them with only a few of us?" Trevelyan asked. He already had an idea as to what the answer would be. The voices of battle; metal clinking and arcane energy sweeping was enough to put his pain aside and refocus his attention on the mission he was tasked with.

"Between the red templars and the sentinels, I doubt it. Inquisitor and our finest soldiers are working on clearing the road. Best if you waited for our clear signal in the forward camp just south of here. Catch your breath, you are looking a bit pale"

"Alright, just let me know as soon as possible." he said with a heavy heart and before the commander could turn around he grabbed his shoulder with a serious scowl "I am sorry it didn't work out as we had hoped, Cullen. But rest assured as soon as Samson falls, we will gain the upper hand once again."

"I know, Trevelyan. You have helped us more than you can imagine. Or perhaps _you_ can imagine it. Either way let us not waste this chance we were given."

"We will overcome this trial. I'll make sure of it." Trevelyan assured and his hand's grip slightly increased on the commander's shoulder " Regardless of the ending, it's been an honour to fight alongside you, Cullen."

"You too, Trevelyan. Have faith that we will make it through" After a mutual pat on each other's backs, Trevelyan grabbed his horse's reins and rode for the camp without glancing back.

The fighting screams and the intense energy surges subsided greatly once he was amongst the Inquisition soldiers who were getting ready to march forward. He nodded his head gently at Josephine and Briala as he passed them by and found Cassandra waiting for him by a large tent.

 "Good. You have made it" she snarled, already in the mood for the upcoming battle.

"Yes, it was nice of you lead the way, so _efficiently_." He snapped back and somehow they ended up smiling at each other.

"If I didn't believe that you were capable of following, I would have rode slower. Yet, here we both are."

"I am glad that you think so highly of me"

"After learning that you were an Inquisitor with another me on your side, I thought that if I had trusted you enough to follow you into an Elven temple, then the least I could do is to repeat that and make sure you succeed this time around"

"Yes, I agree" Trevelyan nodded "Also it's good to be back in my armour. I even got a proper staff this time around. We will make it in with little problem."

"I hope so, Trevelyan, for all our sakes." A solemn look passed her eyes as they walked around the camp and he thought to himself, what the hell.

"So I hear Varric is working on the next instalment for Swords and Shields!"

"You are joking!" Cassandra exclaimed and startled a few soldiers resting nearby. Even Trevelyan looked taken aback with the hopeful way she twirled towards him. "I mean not that I would care but I had heard from other people that he had given up the series.

"You don't need to worry. It turns out both Lavellan and I had the same thought and got him started on it again."

"I am not worried" she said and nervously fidgeted with the helm of his sword "Did he say when he'd finish it? I am only asking because I do not want him focusing on such stuff while we have bigger concerns."

"Soon. Lucky for you I had already read it in my time. I can give you a summary of what to expect"

"Don't tell me!" she said defensively and then continued whispering to herself "I'll read it when he completes it"

"So you actually read one those books?" asked a husky voice behind him and Trevelyan could feel his ears burning as Dorian's hands caressed his neck. He almost moaned at that but stopped himself before he opened his mouth.

"You were right, I actually felt myself getting dumber after reading it but the book definitely was an experience, of some kind..."

"I'm not surprised to have said that" he replied and tightened his hold before releasing him "We are almost ready to move out."

"Alright, let us move" Cassandra said but Dorian shook his head.

"I am afraid, I have been requested to stand by our Inquisitor's side and assist them in creating a diversion while you enter the temple. Samson is fast approaching and we do not have much time left."

"I see" Trevelyan grimaced. He had wanted to have Dorian by his side for the end but he understood Lavellan's reason for taking him with her. He would have made the same choice if their roles were reversed.

"Don't go lamenting now, Tsion. Solas and Varric will accompany you two and if all goes well we'll meet with you by the Well of Sorrows. Hopefully Morrigan knows the way in as well as you do."

"I talked to her through the path back in Skyhold. She'll be ready. You on the other hand, just be careful, love" Cassandra made a disgusted noise beside him but it was easy to ignore as Dorian cupped his cheek and gave him a chaste kiss on the lips.

"Same goes for you, Tsion. If you don't come back from this, I'll make sure to pull you out of whichever Thedas you fall into and kill you myself."

"I have no choice but to return to you, then" he replied leaning in for a second kiss.

"You better... Now get a move on. You won't have much time once the signal is lit."

With a heavy heart, Trevelyan turned away and followed Cassandra towards the edge of the camp.

*

"Try not to step on the dwarf's foot" Varric complained as they silently walked pass the battle site while remaining hidden amongst the thick collection of branches and the bushes.

"Sorry. Slipping through this shit is not as easy as I imagined it to be" Trevelyan whined in return.

"Be silent. We are not supposed to be heard" Cassandra hissed and cursed as her shield got stuck on a nearby twig. Trevelyan could easily imagine Solas sighing as he walked in front of them without compromising his elegant stance. He wanted to hurry the elven mage but he knew one wrong move or one too loud of a voice would ruin all their plans. So he forced his mouth shut and laid low while his heart continued to hammer in his chest with all the new possibilities as to how this could end.

Another ten minutes later, they were safely away from the closest fight and Varric was free to complain "Are we there yet, Chuckles? I think I sprained something and there are leaves in my unmentionables."

"Yes, we are, dwarf." Solas sighed and climbed down the short pathway, ending in front of two giant halla statues. Trevelyan let out a deep sigh at completing the first quartet of their mission. He took the lead and much to his dismay when they passed through the almost hidden passageway, they were faced with a new obstacle.

The long bridge stood before them with the guardian statues still intact. Last time, they had come here Corypheus had been kind enough to destroy them and eliminate the sentinels along with it. Now the tall statues were brimming with energy and a couple of sentinels were bracing their bows against them.

Solas moved past them and addressed the ancient elves "We are not here to harm you or your temple, friends. A dangerous foe approaches to your temple with a foul intention and he must be stopped no matter the cost. Please, allow us entrance and let us speak with Abelas." The sentinels were disturbed, possibly shocked to hear an outsider speak Abelas' name. They took a step back but did not lower their weapons.

"Whatever Chuckles has said them better work or our journey is going to end a lot faster than expected" Trevelyan frowned as he faced Varric. When he saw the similar unsympathetic looks on both Cassandra's and Varric's, he realized that he was the only who was able to understand Solas' elven speech.

"Oh, I see" he mumbled as the voices in his mind began their chattering and told him as much. He walked to Solas' side "Tell them that I carry the wisdom of the Well of Sorrows and if they move aside I can prove them that I can pass through the guardian statues without ending up extra crispy."

Solas narrowed his eyes but delivered the request in better words to the sentinels. Now amused and certain of his certain death, they side stepped from the path. Little they knew that Trevelyan's few talents included surviving in the direst of situations.

He stepped forward with a determined stroll and just at the tip of the bridge, where the statues stood, he felt the energy accumulation. His skin prickled and at the same time as the statues started acting up, his elven marking glowed a deep blue. Loud gasps were heard and as the blue was just about to turn its crimson shade, the statues were deactivated by the sentinels.

Solas and the sentinels exchanged a few more words but Trevelyan was busy not blacking out. He released a breath he had been holding in and staggered sideways. Cassandra was there to keep him straight when one of the elves motioned them to follow him with a great distaste on his face. Trevelyan didn't blame him for it.

Upon crossing the bridge with taking some help from his staff as a source of balance, they reached the giant doors of the temple. The inside was as Trevelyan remembered it, old yellow walls wrapped up by various plants, pathways broken and split by overgrown roots of the nearby trees and a jungle like scenery dominating the ancient great halls of the temple. Without hesitation, he pressed on and even passed their guide, on his way to the ritual place in the middle of the courtyard. The ache in his arm had flared upon activation and he didn't want to waste a second in case it got agonizing enough to incapacitate him before they reached the well.

This time around he could clearly read the inscription on the sole of the statue but he didn't bother with it, already knowing what it said. The whispers in his mind guided his path. With a single try all ground beneath his feet lit up and the door beyond the long staircase creaked open.

The sentinel stood in awe and even his companions raised their brows at him. "Let's go!" he urged them. Anger and fear was bubbling in his chest as he thought of Dorian, Cole and all the others facing off red templars so that they could reach the inner sanctum. They simply didn't have time to dwell on pondering when they could be pacing forth.

The Hall of Shrines was free of any enemies, besides the sentinels surrounding them. There was no hole in the ground to jump through and the door leading to their was shut tight. His arm felt heavy on his side and he drank the last drops of his medicinal tea from his leather flask. A final push, he told himself. One last push and they could convince Abelas to directly take them to the Well without the drama or Samson in their way.

"To prove yourself, you must take-" the sentinel started as he reached him in the temple grounds but he really didn't have the patience to hear another speech.

"The petitioner's path, I know" shouted Trevelyan as he ran towards the first ritual ground. He recalled Morrigan's words as he completed the rituals one by one.

 _"Mankind blunders through the world"_ she had stated as if she wasn't one of them _"crushing what it does not understand: elves, dragons, magic..."_

"Well, this man had done something beyond even that, Morrigan, and screwed up the time itself. It gives _blundering_ _through_ a whole new meaning. To stem the tide, you said. Let's see if I can do better than that"

"Should we go, help him or something?" Varric's voice ringed through the empty space "He is talking to himself. I am getting worried here"

"I must agree. We should lent him a helping hand" Cassandra concurred but Solas interrupted her.

"Let us wait until he finishes the rituals and show his respects to the elven ways. The sentinels are certain to value a display of deference." As if on cue the magic on the main doorway was dispelled and Trevelyan appeared in their peripheral vision. "Well done, my friend. Only a selected few would have taken the time to complete these rituals."

"Don't praise me yet, Solas. We still need to convince Abelas of our cause. This bit might be more tricky"

"We should press on quickly then" Cassandra said as she stepped forward "Inquisition soldiers are fighting tooth and nail outside. We need to finish this now"

Trevelyan couldn't have agreed more.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Cole reminds me of a lost butterfly. (Even Cole's writer said that he had been the most difficult charater he had ever written, and I concur. I love him but do I try to write him properly...)


	18. The price of a second chance

* * *

 

The chamber, as it had done before revealed Abelas and his sentinels. Their self-proclaimed guide summarised his actions, passed on their request and emphasised on the elven markings he carried. As Abelas went into great detail of explaining who they were and what their mission was, Trevelyan listened with an undying patience out of respect.

Abelas sounded as indifferent as before but there was a glimpse of curiosity behind his words. "I know what you seek," he said, "Like all who come before, you wish to drink from the Vir'abelasan. It is not for you. It is not for _any_ of you"

"Yes, a bit too late for that" Trevelyan interjected. That had Abelas paused. "You see, I have already been here and done that. This is not the first time we are having this conversation. I know everything about the well and your past. I can hear it as whispers in my mind, constantly intercepting with my own thoughts. But they lack focus and ever since entering the temple it has gotten worse. I am clearly running out of time and still got so much to lose that neither of us can afford to waste more of it. There is an army lead by Corypheus, waiting outside to run over your temple. They search for the Well and the Eluvian. We must reach it before they do and the ancients in my head are all rooting for that too. So, please let us cut this short and get to the well before all is lost, again."

"Trespassers you are, but you have followed rites of the petition. You have shown respect to Mythal. If what you say is true then you have already-"

A loud explosion noise rattled the chamber and dread filled Trevelyan's mind "They are already here. Did Lavellan- no. I must focus... Abelas, there is no more time. Please, aid us!"

"Sentinels" Abelas shouted to his men "protect the sacred ground. If these others who defile our grounds are enemies of yours, we will aid you in destroying them. When this is done, you shall be permitted to depart. But the Vir'abelasan shall not be despoiled. Even if I must destroy it myself."

Trevelyan was about to protest but one of the whispers in his mind cleared a path through the rest of noises and made itself heard. His breath hitched as the words gained meaning and that meaning gave the momentum he needed to convince Abelas.

"And that's exactly what you had done last time, Abelas" he screamed after the Elvhen sentinel. Solas and Cassandra whipped their heads towards him in shock and Varric shifted his stance to get a better visual on him. "Last time, we had earned your trust and you had fought alongside us. Helped us defeat Samson and his men. You promised us your aid and even agreed to preserve the wisdom of well. You granted us permission to drink from the well and use its power to stop the oncoming nightmare. But you had lied, you son of a bitch. You had already poisoned the well long before we had reached it and when I took one sip from it, the poison reacted to my anchor, rejecting it and all of the elven originated magic within it. It almost cost me my life and everyone around me." His markings glowed with a fierce blue and Abelas recoiled physically at the sight "It was your fault that the world shook that day and I was thrown into this unknown world. It was you who condemned us and your own ancient gods, forcing them to take drastic measures so that we could have a world to live in."

"Is this true?" he inquired. Solas nodded in agreement.

"Yes, it must be. Otherwise, how do you explain, a human carrying the markings of the ancients? What you had done in his timeline caused a rip through the time. He was sent back to the past and was faced with a whole new trial because you failed to keep your end of the bargain."

"I don't know much about elvish commitments but this one sounds serious," added in Varric, "Are you really going to risk destroying this world over some misplaced pride? Because I can assure you, it never ends well"

Abelas contemplated on their words and measured them each separately. In the mean time, Trevelyan reached out for a support to prevent himself from falling. Cassandra found his arm and threw it over her shoulders. He was grateful for it.

His markings lost their colour and this time around the red that embodied them stuck instead of fainting. Trevelyan knew that his countdown had begun. He was prepared for it though; To meet his end and give the rest of the Inquisition a fighting chance. He had to make sure that Abelas didn't harm them, that the well was secured and his friends remained safe. If only he could have had Dorian with him too but perhaps this was better. Without him to remind him the reasons to live, he could easily give up anything and everything we ever wanted.

"Abelas" he slurred as the pain shot through his anchor and his whole arm lost its feeling. "We won't get a third chance. Help us preserve the world." The elvish tongue spilled perfectly from his mouth as he repeated the words from his mind "Let us protect the world and the vision of Mythal"

It took only another nervous second before Abelas nodded in agreement "Very well, follow me"

*

Half walking and half being carried by Cassandra's strong grip, Trevelyan and his companions trailed after the ancient elf. They moved through doors and chambers of immense beauty that even made Varric whistle at them. Unfortunately for the sentinels, the red Templars had cut through the temple, hacking and slashing their way into the inner sanctums. With Corypheus' power and Samson's army, the enemy faced little resistance.

The real power which stood against red Templars was the Inquisition soldiers on the outside but there were few of them, probably only the forward scouts fighting them off within the temple. Trevelyan tried to shut out the screams, the whispers in his head were bad enough without adding the fearful and agonised shrieks.

"We should be helping them" he bit out but he was aware that he was in no condition to actually do so. Yet, the awareness of his own weaknesses grew heavy in his heart.

"The best way to help them is by achieving our goal, Trevelyan. Trust in your men, as we are trusting you." He nodded, as he wasn't able to do much else and they moved quickly across the rooms. Once he saw the open sky, he let out a relieved sigh. It was a short lived one as armoured footsteps closed in on them. Even if they were on higher ground, the sheer number of the Templars approaching them scared him. Abelas must have felt similarly because he had already called his own men to protect them.

Trevelyan urged Cassandra to move forward as Abelas' sentinel took their fighting stance against the red templars. Samson appeared with a smug face beyond the two sets of soldiers and Trevelyan's heart got caught in his throat. Before he could fully panic, shouts were heard and a fireball hit Samson square in the back. As he stumbled forward and averted his gaze to the direction of the attack, Trevelyan saw the glints of dual blades slashing through a black smoke. Lavellan's attack connected with Samson's armour and suddenly everyone was moving.

The sentinels didn't show mercy and hit the enemy soldiers with all of their arsenals. Meanwhile, Inquisitor's party cornered Samson and Trevelyan felt his heart easing as he caught a glimpse of Dorian'shigh-speed attack along with Blackwall's strong slash and Cole's silent cut.

A black smoke gathered around then and while they were too stunned to move, a red templar moved against them but one of Sera's arrow slashed through the air and got the enemy right in the throat.

"This way" yelled Abelas and lead them upwards. The rocks formed beneath his feet and he climbed through the green magical path with ease. Cassandra's feet began moving as she gained her senses and she dragged Trevelyan by the waist. Solas and Varric followed them just from a foot away and warded off any other unwanted enemy attacks.

It took a great deal for him to simply focus on moving forth, one leg after the other but as the battle raged on behind him, Trevelyan recalled all that he had lost before and all that he wasn't prepared to lose now. They had come so far with so little that he wasn't about to let it be ruined by Abelas nor by Corypheus.

The Well of Sorrows greeted them atop of the rocky stairs. The giant Eluvian stood behind the well with the silver shine, inactive but as mesmerising as ever. Trevelyan would have appreciated the scenery more if they actually had more time to dwell on it. Abelas had a different idea, though. With a frowning face, he stood by the well.

"Do you even know what you ask?" the elvhen keeper said and if he could throw a punch at that moment, Trevelyan would have knocked Abelas' teeth out with great pleasure. "As each servant of Mythal reached the end of their years, they would pass their knowledge on through this. All that we were. All that we knew. It would be lost forever.

"Stop your blabbering, Abelas!" yelled the Herald, "We already went through this. My men are dying out there while you second guess yourself. You know that you can't keep the well safe any longer."

"I-" he stuttered but Trevelyan cut him off again.

"The world is changing, Abelas. Holding onto what's left is only harming you and your men. You said it to me before that each time you awaken it slips further from your grasp. Soon, with Corpheus around, nothing will be left for you to protect. I am already bound to Mythal, I already posses the knowledge of the well but it is poisoned. Let me fix this and protect your inheritance from the enemy."

"You have a righteousness in you that I can't deny and even knowing the consequences you persist to proceed. Very well. If faith is kind, you will survive this ordeal."

"We will!" Cassandra pressed on. Pleased with her trust in them, Trevelyan grasped his staff for balance as Abelas left them and he walked into the well with wobbly legs. The wetness spread to his knees and he felt the healing touch of the water. The voices in his head slowed down, allowing him to breathe clearly and his arm gained some of its senses back.

A blue glow appeared on the surface of the water, emanating from the centre of the well, spiralling towards him. The water warmed considerably and his elven markings fainted ever so slightly. A soft energy, similar to his arcane magic surrounded him.

"Is this safe?" Varric inquired, "You aren't going to drown in it or anything?"

"No, I should be fine" the Herald replied with a confident tone.

"As self-assured as ever," a familiar voice said from the other side of the well and four heads snapped in its direction. "But that's what I love about you, Amatus"

The blue glow reshaped itself into three figures who stood in the well, side by side. His heart skipped a beat and his shoulders tensed as his old companions, Dorian with his arms crossed, Cassandra with one hand resting on her sword's hilt and Solas with a tilted head, welcomed him with pleased smiles.

He heard Cassandra gasping "Impossible!" and Solas musing "Incredible" on stumbling upon their counterparts from his timeline.

"Even I can't make this shit up or convince anyone to believe it" Varric complained.

His Cassandra shook her head "Not impossible. We stand here visible, do we not?"

"How can that be?"

"That is a most excellent question, Seeker!" Dorian said, "One we shall explain but first, we must fix our dear Inquisitor's health. Come forth, Amatus?" Trevelyan didn't need to be told twice. He parted the water and the dim lights playing within. Dorian stopped him with a raised hand when he got too close and if there were tears in his eyes, well... he never claimed to be a strong man.

"Hello, love" he whispered, fearing that any sound above a whisper would break the spell and dispel his companions visions. His urge to throw his arms around Dorian and bury his face in the young man's neck was too overwhelming. He was afraid though, scared to death that this was just a trick of the well or a ploy of his mind.  "Are you real or have I finally lost it?"

"How do you define reality, my friend?" his Solas intercepted " We were once corporal enough to walk this earth but now we are stuck in the memories and the dreams. We pace the Fade with the magic of ancients and with the power of Mythal but does that make us any less real?"

His counterpart drew his brows together, "Have you ascended to be spirits now?"

"No, but that does have a nice ring to it." Dorian mused and both Cassandra's let out disgusted growls.

"Am I tripping balls?" Varric said still in denial of what he was seeing, "Because one Seeker was dangerous enough but being near two of them, synchronised and annoyed won't end well for me."

"Dorian" Trevelyan murmured, ready to reach out but Dorian evaded his fingers, instead, he flickered his hand above the Herald's left arm. Arcane energy gathered within the young mage's palms and then seeped through his skin, first burning and then soothing the aggravated veins. The green glow diminished and his muscles relaxed.

Trevelyan removed his glove and unbounded the cuffs of his undershirt. The green veins were gone, the pain subsided and his mark emitted its natural radiance. "Thank you," he said, eyes glancing between his once companions; unable to form the apologies he had to give or speak of the gratitude he felt.

"How does it feel to be bound to an ancient Goddess, Amatus? Surely it is as exciting as it sounds?"

"Exciting is not the word I would use. So far all it did was to separate me from you and slowly drain my life away." A thousand questions swam in his head but Trevelyan could only stare at his beloved one's eyes and not get lost in the affectionate gaze of the grey orbs.

"Lord Inquisitor," called out his Cassandra, effectively breaking the glum moment between Trevelyan and Dorian. He noted that she was looking slightly abashed to interrupt them but they both understood the reason behind the urgency in her voice. "Time is of the essence, you must drink from the well if Dorian's healing is to hold and the poison to be extracted from your body"

"It's not my healing, really" Dorian explained "Rather, it is Mythal's. I am simply conveying her magic along with her sincerest apologies. Now go ahead and drink. We will be waiting for you here"

Trevelyan nodded. After sparing a glance at his other companions and getting their approvals, he dipped his hands into the well. A sudden flash of memories shook him and the fear of failing again, dying or worse, appeared as possibilities in his mind. His legs trembled and his breathing grew heavier.

"Take a deep breath, Amatus. Relax. All you have to do is to bring the water to your lips now. Imagine it's me offering you a glass of the finest Orlaisian whisky as we wrap ourselves in each other's embrace. Imagine the nights we spent together, with nothing but you, me, a bowl of grapes and warm wine to accompany us. That's it. The taste is better this time around, isn't it?"

The waves of water wobbled as if an earthquake hit them, as soon as Trevelyan had gulped down a handful of silver water. An intense mist surrounded them when all water was gone from the well. Only he and his old companions remained in the midst of the empty pool. Strings of light floated around them and the day went dark but his markings shone in the colour of the sky, brighter than ever before. There was no pain this time and his skin didn't turn crimson nor it hurt.

"See, all better"

"Yes," he agreed and spun around himself, trying to figure out where he stood. Difficult words cut through his throat but he had to know. He had to ask. "Be honest, love. Did you all die?"

It was Solas who answered him while Dorian stood silently with a sad frown on his face, "You drank from the well to gain the elven wisdom but the corruption within the anchor along with Abelas' poison rejected you. If Mythal had not interfered when she did, we all would have been dead."

"What do you mean, Solas? Are you still out there, in our timeline? Can I return?"

"I am so sorry, Amatus but that past has already been erased. There is no _our timeline_ for you to return to." Dorian apologised as his arms crossed across his stomach. He seems so afraid, Trevelyan thought. So afraid and alone... A grim doom consumed his heart.

"It is lost then... All of you are gone, I failed you"

"You haven't failed us, Inquisitor. If anything you gave us a second chance. It was foolish of you to accept a deal from this _Mythal_ but it did save our skin in the long run." Cassandra said with a straight face and no remorse for the way her mission ended so abruptly.

"What deal?" he asked first.

"You do not remember? That explains a lot actually"

"Cassandra, Solas, Dorian! Please explain this to me." he pleaded then.

"Perhaps the ancients can refresh your memories, my friend," Solas said and twirled his staff, sending an energy burst in the form of white specks of dust. Trevelyan coughed a little but soon the voices of the ancients echoed in the vast emptiness of the pool. They spoke gently and slowly, wishing for him to fully grasp and appreciate his situation.

_Long before you made it to the Well, our guardian, Abelas had already poisoned the well of knowledge and doomed the ancient wisdom that laid within. We could not allow us to die._

This he already knew.

_You were presented with a dilemma; you could either have your companions die but let the world commence as it always did or retract your existence in this world and give them a second chance with a past yet to come to pass. We gave you a choice in return for your allegiance, you picked them._

"Why do I still exist then? Why did I not perish alongside my friends?"

_What good is a lesson if the one who needs it the most is no longer around to learn it? You were never meant to disappear, not truly. As long as your bonds remain attached to us, you shall command the power of Mythal and protect the wisdom of the ancients. Your companions lived on without you up until now and when you awakened in this world, you were armed with the knowledge of your past to correct the future that laid before you all. With the timelines aligned once again, you are to finish what you started in your own timeline. No matter the cost._

"Does that mean, you will-" he couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence.

"We should have died, Trevelyan" Cassandra sighed.

"Yet instead we merged with the Well when Mythal's final magic remedied this world for a second chance.  We have been guiding and protecting you ever since, my friend."

"Even from yourself which happened often enough"

"With making a bit of influence on the rest of the Inquisition, as well but let's not mention that too loud" Dorian snickered.

Trevelyan recalled what Cole said to him in his chambers "The vigour and the magic of your friends delve into our world and reach you from beyond the time itself. You do not need to fear. You are being protected."

"What will happen to you now that the Well of Sorrows is gone?"

"It's not gone but resides within you. We are but illusions of a past long gone, so we will perish." Solas grimaced and Trevelyan flinched away in fear and anger.

"No, no, there has to be a way"

"To do what, Inquisitor?" Cassandra said, "Get us back to this world? Look around you. We are already there!"

"But-"

"You have to let our memory go, Tsion." Dorian whispered with a sad tone and reached out as if to touch his cheek but all Trevelyan felt was an unnatural coldness swiping across his face. A faint blue glow startled him and his markings reacted to Dorian's existence as if to prove that they once had been real.

"I'm taking this back. You'll have to earn it once again but since it is you, I am sure it will be fine" he added much to Trevelyan's confusion. The glow fainted but didn't completely vanish. The amulet of birthright was the one that was glowing now. Trevelyan felt panic building up inside as the golden chain's weight disappeared and the amulet floated with the force of magic around it until it was consumed by light completely. It reappeared over Dorian's neck and Trevelyan felt the full weight of the inevitable ending to their story. "Yes, I will. Dorian, I-"

"Hush, now. No need to shed any tears for we are not lost."

A flicker of the shadows and the light residing within the pool fainted ever so slowly. Trevelyan gritted his teeth but didn't hide or run away. He stood his ground as his companions spoke one by one.

"Time is running short, my friend. I bode you farewell and good luck in your journey."

"Thank you" he replied strongly and observed as blue light formed around Solas and covering every inch of body and dissipating into nothingness as the spirit faded.

"May Andraste watch over you, Trevelyan. Believe in yourself that you will succeed as we believe in  you." Trevelyan beamed at the familiar words and saluted Cassandra as she too, disappeared in a flash of light. Knowing what came next, Trevelyan faced Dorian and tried to put on a content face but it failed miserably. His vision blurred and unable to hold it back any longer his tears flowed freely down his cheeks.

"This is not goodbye, Amatus. Do not fear for us nor for yourself. When this apparition disappears I will still be behind you, waiting for you to awaken."

"I know, love. I understand it now"

"Good, I expect nothing less than your full heart then. Now you have a promise to keep, don't you, Amatus?" Trevelyan smiled sincerely, unable to do anything but watch as Dorian's skin started glowing a deep blue and shone like the beacon of hope, he always associated him to be. A final tear slid down his face, his eyes began to sting but he didn't blink, not until Dorian closed his own and vanished with a flash of light.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Dorian Pavus is the first for male only romance option in the entire series, who was named after "Prince Dorian" from the catoon Hercules, for some reason (I had thought it was from the well known narcissist, Dorian Grey) and was written by David Gaider (who also wrote fan favourites like Zevran, Cassandra and Alistair). Unfortunately, Gaider has left the Dragon Age series after this game but he is working on a new project with Bioware. So you know that project is gonna have some awesome new characters to look forward to =D


	19. Ghosts of a lost life

* * *

 

"Did that just happen?" squeaked Varric and even as shocked as he was, the dwarf still ran to catch Trevelyan who had been on his knees since the mist had dissipated. One hand on the ground and the other grasping his hair, Trevelyan had the demeanour of a lost, hurting child but with the eyes of a wild dragon. Varric actually had to step back once the Herald had lifted his gaze with a hint of murderous intent evident within them. "Calm down, now, Herald. It is going to be alright. Just answer this, how are you holding up? Still in pain?"

"No, I live," he replied with a broken voice and Varric wanted to kick whichever Goddess or mystical water had hurt his friend. "Dorian healed my anchor with Mythal's magic and I am most definitely bound to her, now. The ancient magic, wisdom or whatever the hell that was also calmed down and it's not actively trying to kill me now."

"So the poison is gone, too?" Cassandra asked, "You will live?"

"Yeah, true" He replied without moving from his spot.

"That is good news, my friend."

"Of course" he parroted unconsciously. Varric was beyond worried by that time. Hurried footsteps approached them and Trevelyan closed his eyes, muttering something he couldn't quite hear. He shook the young mage and tried to get him to move but he was stunned far beyond comprehension.

"Seeker," he yelled, "What's happening down there?" Cassandra had already taken a defensive position and Solas was standing by her side.

"There is a commotion in the courtyard. I cannot see the details because of the smoke!"

"Herald, I think it's a good time for you to lend us a hand. Whatever is coming may not be good" As soon as he finished talking a couple of figures came through the heavy smoke, climbing up the rocky pathway. Dorian and Lavellan had emerged with their weapons drawn and faces conflicted with fear. Varric's shoulders relaxed upon seeing them and the rest of the Inquisition following closely on their heels.

"I resent that, Varric. I am more than just good," Dorian retorted and Trevelyan cracked his eyes open as the young mage walked into the empty pool and put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you alright, Tsion?"

"I will be," He said but he didn't think he could ever be the same again. He clasped Dorian's hand with his own, "We move forward, yeah?"

"Yes, we do." Dorian tightened his hold and lowered himself to properly look Trevelyan in the eye. He didn't like the broken and dispirited eyes he saw but there was little he can do in open ground, least of being an easy prey to their enemies, "Come on now, Samson is defeated but we should leave while we still can."

Trevelyan nodded and stood up with great difficulty. Varric on one side and Dorian on the other, supported him until he gained his balance but Dorian wasn't convinced when Trevelyan waved them off and he threw the mage's arm around his shoulders anyway. He could feel the way Trevelyan slugged down towards him almost like a dead weight. Instead of asking for someone else, Dorian assumed that Trevelyan wouldn't want to accept any other help.

"Look out" someone warned; It was Blackwall and he was pointing at a balcony on the other side of the courtyard. Dorian's heart dropped to his stomach as Corypheus came into view. Before he can even think of walking, the dead weight on his side was removed. Trevelyan, now standing on his own -yet slightly crooked- feet, took two long strides in the direction of the Eluvian. A blue glow engulfed him and the elvhen marking shone as he lifted his hand and the Eluvian shone in response to him.

"Through here!" he yelled. Morrigan was the first to jump through the Eluvian, setting the rest of them in motion and guiding them. Lavellan also encouraged everyone as the Inquisitorial team disappeared into the blue shine, one by one.

Corypheus had already started to move and by the time he closed in on them, only Dorian, Trevelyan and Lavellan was left around. Lavellan, as quick as the rogue that she was, didn't lose any time following her friends and Trevelyan bodily pushed Dorian to get out of there. Once the young mage was safely back in Skyhold, greeted by the rest of team, a dread filled him.

For a long, frightful moment nobody moved and the Eluvian remained active. Dorian was certain that this was the end, that Trevelyan wouldn't come back with them to Skyhold and he would rather choose to be destroyed by the enemy in a place he was proposed to die; with a memory long lost and a future bleaker than he could ever imagine.

A couple of hands squeezed his biceps and only then he realised that he had been attempting to go back through the Eluvian. Cassandra, Cole and Varric all had a hand on both his arms and he swallowed nervously.

When the surface of the mirror finally crackled and Trevelyan appeared, the hands on him were lost and Dorian reached out to touch Trevelyan's face and assure himself of his existence. The mage smiled at him weakly and it was enough to convince Dorian that his beloved one was there with them.

The Eluvian's glimmer crackled again and faded. Trevelyan's fingers traced Dorian's forearm and with a small apology, prayed his hands off of his face. Dorian took an embarrassed step back without actually leaving Trevelyan's personal space. The man still looked ready to crush down at the first given chance.

"Corypheus?" inquired Lavellan.

"He almost made it to me but Myhtal appeared in her spirit form to stall his advance and give me some time to escape. I firmly believe that she broke the Eluvian in the temple and it is now unusable, so we don't need to worry about it."

"That's a relief," Blackwall stated with a gruff, "Now we don't have to worry about an evil magister following us into our own stronghold."

"Yes, we have done well. Both the Eluvian and the Well of Sorrows are secured," Lavellan agreed, "We will gather the war council as soon as rest of our troops arrive. Morrigan, Trevelyan, a moment?"

Dorian was about to interfere and insist on getting Trevelyan back to his bed but he knew there were bigger concerns than a few hours of missed sleep. Instead, he reached into his bag and pulled out his last potion.

"Here, take this. It will help you," he said as he handed the potion to Trevelyan who drank it gratefully. Dorian wasn't certain what the potion would help with, after all, there were no apparent wounds on the Herald's body but it seemed to have helped since some colour returned to Trevelyan's cheeks.

"Thanks," Trevelyan whispered with a distant gaze and a small nod. Dorian tried not to take his coldness personally.

*

A large, curious crowd was gathered in the garden just outside of the room. Apparently, about ten of the Inquisition's best and finest, who were supposed to be in Arbor Wilds, suddenly materialising in a room one size too small was enough cause for the commodity. As if that were the weirdest thing they had ever come across in Skyhold, the people in the garden led by Mother Giselle demanded to know what was going on.

Dorian, following Cole's example, melted into the shadows during Lavellan's crowd control speech. Morrigan on her side shook her head at the talk and Trevelyan stood one step behind unmoving, with his back straighter than Dorian has ever seen.

"Hey Sparkles, want to hit the tavern before Nightingale begins her interrogation cycle?" Dorian's head automatically bobbed up and down despite his eyes not leaving Trevelyan's rigid posture.

"Count me in," Blackwall replied somewhere from behind him, "After this mess, I'll need more than just one drink to regain my senses." He and Varric started walking away with exhaling equally tired sighs. Dorian saw little reason not to join them. Lady Leliana's henchman would soon appear to get their reports and a nice, cold wine before that particular conversation might just be what he needs to get his head back into the game. As tired as he was, Dorian knew he couldn't be in a worse state than the rest of the Inquisition so if they had the strength to not to crash on the nearest horizontal surface, then so could he.

The tavern keeper, who was called Cobot or something along those lines, narrowed his eyes upon their entry. The tavern was especially hushed without the Bull or his Charge's occupying half of the area. Even the tavern bard was nowhere in sight, possibly busy writing the expected tragic ending to Trevelyan's story.

"I hadn't heard that the troops have returned," Cobot said suspiciously as they made themselves comfortable on the bar stools.

"And I thought you didn't care much for gossip," Dorian snapped, "But if you must know; we transported ourselves through a magical mirror, all the way from the Arbor Wilds, through the Fade and into the tiniest room you could ever find in the whole lot of Skyhold."

"Bloody magic..." the keeper murmured and went to get their usual drinks while complaining.

"I concur with that sentiment," said Varric who had sat in the middle of two humans, "This is the beginning of a joke; A mage, a warrior, a rogue and a spirit walked into a tavern..." It was then Dorian realised that Cole was awkwardly standing by the bar, looking a bit uncertain as he fiddled with the hem of his shirt.

"Take a seat, Cole" Dorian offered and slid his stool to make room for another one but Cole averted his big eyes and hid his face behind the giant hat.

"The voices from beyond the time has withdrawn their help. They no longer exist in between the worlds or even in the Fade. Other voices occupy his mind now. Some are sad and angry, others less so. They don't all belong to him yet those that do, hurt him."

"I- I should go," Dorian stuttered but strong grips held him back a second time that day. He was starting to get annoyed with it immensely.

"And what? Are you going to drag the Herald away from Lavellan?" asked Varric.

"If need be! He is suffering, dwarf. I need to be there."

"Inquisitor called him to her side for a reason, Pavus" Blackwall interjected "She wouldn't have done that without a good cause."

"He is right, you know. Besides do you not want to hear about what happened at the well before you run off?"

Dorian shot Cole a questioning look, asking if the time was of essence or not. The spirit shook his head "To help him, first you must help yourself. With a heavy heart in your chest, you would only hinder his healing."

"Very well," Dorian crushed down on his stool with a palm running through his hair, "Tell your story, Varric and make it a good one."

*

Well, shit! Dorian thought and sped up his walk towards the sleeping quarters. The night had fallen while Varric had shared the details of the well; how they had met their counterparts from Trevelyan's real timeline. The counterpart's trust in Trevelyan hadn't shocked the dwarf but he had especially emphasised the scariness of facing two Cassandra's and Solas' at the same time.

Dorian's other self had been there too, but much to his dismay he couldn't see that. He would have loved to meet another him and in another time, such an occurrence would have delighted him.

He really didn't have it in him to muse over that. As Varric's tale twisted and turned, both Blackwall and Dorian listened in awe about how before Abelas had poisoned the well, almost killing them and Trevelyan stepped in, accepting the deal from a goddess to give them a second chance. Even after he had drunk from the well and Trevelyan's body was lost within a mist of arcane energy, Varric had heard Trevelyan's and his companion's farewells. The storyteller's voice had cracked while he spoke of that moment, and Dorian felt his own get stuck in his throat. No one could have come back from such an atrocious experience without ending up resenting the world and hating himself for it.

"The sun shines strong but no light reaches his eyes; A darkness festers within that I can't unravel. It is entangled with memories and pain but there is hope there as well. He clings to it lest it be the last thing he does." 

Cole resigned to a darker corner by then and the way he avoided Dorian told the young mage that he was right; Trevelyan was suffering through the loss of all hope he ever had for returning back to his friends. Despite having acted like he was a part of their world, he must have kept a shred of light to get him by the night. Dorian didn't blame the man for it. It was the most simple reaction to have when faced with an inevitable predicament; to return to a world you helped create with your fellow friends or to start fresh in a world where you had never existed, to begin with.

A horn blew in the distance, letting the people know that a troop of soldiers had returned from their battle. He recognised the fancy cart that would be carrying Josephine and the selected few who had marched the battle alongside them. It would be soon that they would call out for them to explain the shit they have been through. He really hoped to catch Trevelyan before that.

In front of his chambers, Dorian knocked on the door lightly. There was no light coming from the gap below the wood but he heard soft shuffling. A groan replied and the door was creaked open to reveal Trevelyan with his hair tousled and eyes swollen. Dorian chose not to comment on it.

"Already done with drinking tonight?" Trevelyan asked carefully, the smile on his lips failing to reach his eyes.

"I figured magical transportation and fiendish wine served by cranky dwarves don't mix well. Then it was accompanied by embellished stories from another entitled dwarf, a Warden was suddenly elaborating his thoughts on immortality and it was very overwhelming to listen to so naturally  I came to share the knowledge with you!" Even Dorian was aware that he was just making up an excuse to be near Trevelyan and while talking nonsense wasn't his preferred method, the peculiar events had forced his hands.

"Your enthusiasm brightens my day," Trevelyan mused, "Is there any chance we can postpone it though?"

The dismiss was hard to miss but Dorian didn't believe in backing down so he switched tactics. With all the leer he could conjure up, he leaned in until his nose was inches from Trevelyan's. "Not without a proper Thank-the-Maker-we-are-both-alive kiss. You have a penchant for ending up in almost certain death situations. Thankfully you are just as skilled to get out of them too."

A slight shift in Trevelyan's stance from a strong but tired leader to a broken hearted man was almost comically instant and Dorian bit the insides of his cheek. Still, the marked hand found purchase on Dorian's collar, uncertainly moving up his neck to cup his face. The warm, tingling energy emanated from the anchor with a steady pulse, unlike his heart which was beating anxiously.

"It must have been difficult for you" he whispered as an apology. Trevelyan simply nodded in response and Dorian closed the distance between them. He poured all his heart to the kiss but there wasn't the same ferocity as before. Trevelyan's touches were reserved, faltering in action and his lips were barely able to catch up to his. The Herald was trying but his mind was definitely someplace else. Dorian didn't want to learn where.

He pulled away slowly and Trevelyan sighed in return. "I am sorry, Dorian. I think I just need some time alone to think about it and swallow all that has happened and maybe even mourn. So sorry but-"

"No" Dorian deadpanned, rendering Trevelyan speechless for a change. Heat rose to his face as he recalled Cole's warning ... _but there is hope there as well. He clings to it lest it be the last thing he does._

He didn't want to believe the implications of it but it was there and he feared leaving Tsion alone was the worst idea at that moment. He didn't want Trevelyan to cling to a memory and get lost in the damning world. He didn't deserve a cruel end, not when there was a way to avoid it and all Dorian had to do was to reach out. "No, because if you are left alone then you'll start over thinking it and get all morose and moody on us for days," he said light heartedly, hoping to surpass the obvious tremble in his voice. "What you need is to be among friends to keep your mind occupied and once enough time has passed then it won't be so hard to live with yourself. Now, you can cry your eyes out if it is going to make you feel better but don't expect me to leave you alone like this."

"Dorian," Trevelyan murmured with a crooked voice and the younger mage took it as an accepting gesture and dragged them both into Trevelyan's room. The Herald's posture remained ever so rigid and he wondered in the room purposelessly until he collapsed on his chair by the desk. "I am so tired"

"I know, Tsion," Dorian said. His fingers caressed Trevelyan's messy hair and smoothed the stray strands. Feeling him lean into his touch made Dorian foolishly happy even if he couldn't understand why. He felt even more pleased with Trevelyan's hand sliding up his thigh and his head finding a comfortable position above his heart; his ear pressed on his chest listening to the steady heartbeat.

"What can I do for you?" Dorian asked as he wrapped his arms around Trevelyan.

"Just this is enough. Hearing your heart beat and feeling your warm touch is enough."

"Good. Know that I am here for you. I am here and I exist."

"I know, love" Trevelyan sagged against him, "and I appreciate it. Please, just don't stop touching me."

"I wouldn't dream of it. Let's get to the bed though. I know it is still early but it looks like your lordship could use a nap." A chuckle resonated through him as Trevelyan buried his face into his chest. Together, without untangling from each other, they flopped down on the already messy bed. Dorian was content simply to hold Trevelyan but the other man shifted on his back to accommodate the young mage on top of him.

After laying the blankets over them, Dorian slipped lower to rest his head on Trevelyan's chest and wrapped his limps around him, understanding the man's need to be ascertained of his existence. Releasing a contented noise, Trevelyan mirrored his actions with one hand tangling itself within Dorian's soft locks. The lack of the birthright amulet that once adorned the broad chest, didn't escape his attention. Like a memory lost, it had disappeared along with Trevelyan's final strand of hope.

The heart beat beneath his ear slowed down eventually and its sweet rhythm lulled Dorian to sleep soon after.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Question; What colour even is Dorian's eyes? Are they glassy grey, sky blue or emerald green? I look through his designs and though they do remain pretty in all of them, each one is with a different colour!!


	20. In the dark cover of the night

* * *

 

Trevelyan woke up to feel a hand stroking his left bicep, making round movements on the skin and releasing the tension within his muscles. The hand moved upwards, towards his shoulder, kneading and rubbing. He had meant to remain silent and enjoy the message but he was unable to stop himself from letting out a moan as the clever fingers dug into his skin at a certain angle.

A soft chuckle was heard but the hands didn't stop their advance and moved on to his neck. "You have been grasping your shoulder in your sleep. Feeling any better now?" Trevelyan cracked open an eye before answering, facing his beloved one. The lanterns were lit outside, their distant light streaming in through the gap between the curtains. Dorian sat on the bed, only visible as a silhouette leaning over him.

"Must have been a nightmare. I am much better, love. Find me a bowl of grapes to feed me and my day would be complete."

"A most difficult task in this part of the world. No sun, no heat, it's a wonder how anything could be alive. How about a plate of cheese, instead?" Dorian retorted, thumb ghosting over his lower lip. Trevelyan kissed his finger tips and listened as Dorian's breath hitched. "The night is still young. If you wish we can join the others in the tavern or..."

"I'd rather stay here, with you." Trevelyan replied quickly, panic raising in his throat. At Dorian's silence and his tilt of the head, he continued, needing to explain himself. "I doubt we'll find anyone there tonight. Everyone must be tired, dealing with what they have seen and focusing on their reports. We'll need to do that too. It is a surprise that one of Leliana's men didn't barge in here to demand answers yet."

The young mage slightly straightened his back without responding and Trevelyan wished he could see his facial features more clearly. He was half tempted to conjure a small fireball and look into Dorian's beautiful grey eyes, see the reason for his stillness. Then Dorian exhaled a breath and laid beside him, propping up on an elbow to steady himself above Trevelyan.

He turned on his side to face the mage and a hand was spread over his chest, playing with the buttons of his tunic. "One already showed up. I shushed her away before she woke you up."

"I haven't heard that at all. I rarely sleep so deep. In the circle and even after, as apostates, we were always alert and on our toes."

"Fear of being run through by a templar sword does that to you. Also you must be dead tired. I am not surprised, really. All day long we have been running around, killing all sorts of things and well, you know, the well..."

Trevelyan shook his head and grabbed Dorian's hand in his own, halting his gestures. "You can talk about it. I am alright, love"

"That's what you always say. Doesn't mean it is the truth" Dorian bit back and huffed tiredly "I thought-"

"What?" Trevelyan urged and looked at his hesitant face as his sight adjusted to the dark. There was an edge to Dorian's voice and his brows were knitted together which worried Trevelyan. Something wasn't right.

"When we saw Corypheus attack us, I thought you were done for. You sent me through the Eluvian but then you didn't follow. For just a moment I was certain you wouldn't. I don't think I can forgive you for that." Trevelyan rubbed his palm and wrist, trying to bring comfort to the young mage. He heard those words before. When they had come out of the Fade, Dorian had been equally displeased with him, fearing that he had lost him forever.

"I already had doubts of you coming out of this ordeal alive but seeing you standing strong amidst the pool had given me hope, Tsion. Hope that said you _were_ alright, that we were going to be alright. And then, we were in Skyhold and you weren't there. The Eluvian kept on glimmering and you wouldn't come through."

"I am sorry to have worried you, love" Trevelyan whispered "I had full intention of following you but to be honest, I don't think I would have been able to do so had Mythal not interfered." A strangled noise escaped Dorian's throat as if he had just imagined the possibility.

"Tell me, Tsion, had Corypheus reached you, what would you have done?" Dorian inquired, already knowing the answer but still needing to hear it anyway.

"If that were the case then I would have deactivated the Eluvian and blocked the pathway. I would have done everything in my power to prevent Corypheus from reaching Skyhold."

"All the while, effectively trapping yourself on the other side with him" Dorian added with a stoic tone and buried his face under Trevelyan's chin. A sob broke through and Trevelyan's arms were instantly around Dorian's shaking shoulders. It took him a second to realize that the shake was out of anger and not just sadness "That's why I hate you, you know. After all that jousting you have done to get my attention and all that struggle to get us together, you would risk it all with your heroic acts"

"Don't speak as if you would expect anything less from me" Trevelyan countered.

"Obviously I don't but it doesn't mean I have to like any of it"

"Of course not, love. I don't like it either but we have little choice when shove comes to push and if I were certain that it would protect you all, then I wouldn't hesitate to throw myself into the pit."

A long time past without either of them speaking. Trevelyan was certain that Dorian had fallen asleep from the way his breathing had become shallower until he heard a small voice talk. "Are you really alright?"

Trevelyan could have lied easily; he could have said that it was a momentary fear he had felt as Corypheus approached and Mythal had appeared before he had the chance to fully process what was happening. Yet that wasn't how it had happened. By the time Dorian had passed through the Eluvian, Corypheus was already above the rocky pathway and with the speed of a shadow, he was moving towards him while shaking the ground beneath. True, there hadn't been any time but that's why he had put his hand out, towards the mirror. If he didn't have the time to reach it then he would have closed the pathway. He was only a second away from doing so too but Mythal's magic swirled around them, creating a tornado of pure arcane energy just in time. She had throw Corypheus back long enough for him to get his footing back and escape. If it hadn't been for the Goddess' interference, Dorian's omen would have been reality.

He hadn't been afraid; he hadn't really felt anything at all. He had just seen Dorian die, telling him to keep his promise to return to his beloved. Then Dorian was standing by his side. Alive and well. All he could think of was that he couldn't bear to see him die, again. He had to protect him, no matter the cost. He didn't want to say that Dorian either. He remember how much the young mage didn't like being coddled. He hadn't lied when he had told the other Dorian that he understood that they were different people yet at the same time, they were the same. Logically he didn't get it but in his heart he loved both of them separately but with the same fierceness.

One of them might have disappeared but the Dorian he loved was still alive. His heart felt content to finally accept that he grew to love this Dorian just as before. And this Dorian, in his heart, became his once Trevelyan felt his long fingers caressing his face with a fond gaze in his eyes.

"I will be" he said, trying to be as honest as possible, he owed it to him "Now that you are here and safe, I'll be okay."

"I should be saying that to you, Amatus" Dorian replied and went absolutely rigid in Trevelyan's arms. His hold lost some of its strength and his voice cracked "I mean, you risked a lot to protect us and even dared to face off ancient pissed of elves who wanted to do nothing but put an arrow into your eye socket. It is quite admirable."

"Dorian" Trevelyan said trying to hush the young man. It didn't work.

"They most certainly tried to do the same to us but we got lucky, I suppose. Lavellan was tremendously irritated with her own kind attacking us despite having a common enemy and a fast approaching overlord on our heels."

"Dorian" Trevelyan repeated again and when his call wasn't headed, he grabbed one of the young mage's belts on his waist and with one swift motion he turned them around. While bodily pressing him to the bed, from chest to toe, the Herald's lips were on Dorian's ear and a lascivious whisper on his tongue. "Let me hear it again, my love."

 "Hear what?" Dorian asked pouring all his remaining innocence into the simple question.

"I know what it means, Dorian." Trevelyan's body slid between his legs and gently rocked, eliciting a groan from the young mage as their crotches grinded. A wet lick just below his ear sent shivers through his body and Dorian found himself hot and desperate in a matter of seconds. "Do you prefer me to drag it out of you, love? Because you know I will."

"Venhedis! There is no way I can get out of this, is there?" he sighed dropping an arm over his face. The blush that was creeping its way up to his ears was worse than ever. He didn't want to show his hand so soon but there it was, all that he felt was summed up with one single word that he couldn't take back.

"Dorian" Trevelyan called out again and his arm was pulled away. A strong arm was wrapped around him and with the slight pull he rose up on his knees, facing Trevelyan who was smiling like a child who had just been handed a whole cake that he could eat all by himself. He was still holding his waist and stroking the warm skin through his top, smug face dangerously close to his own. He was about to retort to being at a disadvantage but Trevelyan's next words cut through his thought process with a swift precision.

"I love you, Dorian." Trevelyan purred "It took me a while but I have fallen in love with you all over again." He waited for a respond of any kind but Dorian was unable to react for a while. He simply blinked, trying to form a coherent sentence.

"What is it that you wish from me, Tsion? A relationship?" he replied coldly, he hadn't meant it to come out so bitter. Maker, it was the opposite of what he was feeling. Yet the words flew out in an instant.

"Yes" Trevelyan said without missing a beat "Is that such a bad idea? There is no reason for me to suppress my desire since I am no longer dying." He surely had considered the likelihood of Trevelyan asking about this, especially after being waned about it. Yet, it felt surreal and Dorian had to restrain his movement in case he was betrayed by his own body. "Surely it isn't that surprising to hear this from me, love."

"Where I come from anything between two men... It's physical. It doesn't go beyond that. It's not that you don't care. You just don't hope for more." Dorian said and Trevelyan listened carefully. He knew that Dorian's hesitation had deep roots and the fear of rejection haunted him like a plague. He wanted nothing more than to reassure Dorian though so he chose his words with extensive care.

"This right here, is more. If we both let it be more, this could grow into a relationship stronger than any of us could imagine."

"Are you simply saying this because you've seen it happen?"

"No, I am saying this because I care about you." Dorian swallowed thickly, his resolve crumbling in the face of this impossible man.

"And I care about you, you remarkably bizarre creature. Fine, we'll do it your way." Perhaps, the sincere smile he saw on Trevelyan's face was worth diminishing his pride a little. It's not like he was complaining about it once Trevelyan dragged his face towards him kissing and nibbling at his lips.

Trevelyan hadn't expected it to go this smoothly either and he couldn't believe they were starting this but Dorian who was busy melting in his arms was enough evidence to convince him. His smile was still apparent on his face as he parted Dorian's lips and swiped his tongue in his mouth. The moustache burned his cheek faintly when Dorian tilted his head, nuzzling his face. A much needed breath was drawn in and Dorian opened his mouth for him to taste once again.

Both hands found each other's clothes and someone was ripping apart the tunic instead of unbuttoning it and the other was furiously struggling with a handful of belts. Once the first layer of obstacles were removed Dorian distracted Trevelyan with sliding a couple of mischievous fingers down his spine and making them disappear under his trousers.  His breath hitched as the clever fingers grabbed his buttocks while pressuring his entrance with a promise to come.

"Too many layers" he complained, beginning to kiss and bite down Dorian's chin and returning the action with almost forcefully tugging on the mage's belts. He was certain that he heard even more clothes ripping.

"Shall we move on to a more primal activity, my Lord Trevelyan?" Dorian laughed darkly in his ear and the growl he heard in response was most definitely a primal sound.

In a record time, their trousers joined the pile of unwanted clothes on the floor. Dorian didn't remember the last occasion where he felt a naked body pressed against his to feel so good. Trevelyan and he, completed each other in ways he couldn't begin to comprehend. The man's tender touches on his hips, the mouth that never once stopped its ministrations and his hard length sliding perfectly against own.

Teeth grazed his ears and hot breath was exhaled on his neck. As Trevelyan's hand guided him down on to the bed, Dorian didn't resist but wrapped a leg around him, bringing him down along.

"I love you, Dorian" Trevelyan muttered, grinning as Dorian's skin grew warmer with his words. "And I want to take you right here, right now while you are dishevelled and ready for me. So if you tell me there is no oil around here that I can use, I might just cry."

"You are horrible at this" Dorian laughed "But fear not, I always take pride in being prepared for all sorts of situations. Check my sachet on the floor." Tsion was gone for an instant to retrieve the small bottle but it was enough to  cool Dorian's body down by a degree. When he returned there was a dark glint in his eyes that Dorian enjoyed looking at.

"Sorry" Tsion said, surprising Dorian for a second. His harshness was trimmed down to tender touches on his legs. His voice as soft as a fine silk. His fingers caressed Dorian's knees nudging them apart. "I'd love to tease you but I can't wait any longer. I want you Dorian. May I?"

"Asking such a question at this point... You are teasing me!" he replied and spread his legs apart to give Trevelyan something to look at other than his blushing face. It worked wonders as Trevelyan dark gaze descended down on his temple of a body.

To face such an willing position from Dorian froze Tsion and threw his mind into the oblivion. His mind went taut but regained his senses as he kissed Dorian's legs, holding it from behind the knee and moving upwards from there onwards. He licked the insides of his thighs before dropping the slack leg on the bed and his lips found Dorian's length, licking and sucking at the tip. The younger mage's moans went straight to his groins making Tsion incredibly hard and needy. When he tasted the pre cum he released Dorian's cock and licked his own lips, putting a show for the mage who looked ready to complain.

Trevelyan massaged his thighs as he leaned down and captured Dorian's mouth. Dorian retaliated with grinding up at him, hips moving in a sinful way that almost made Trevelyan fuck his partner to the Fade and beyond without any preparations. He knew better than that though and his marked hand lowered itself down his stomach and tugged at Dorian's length with slight pressures. Dorian's sweet and low curses filled the room as Tsion did nothing but listen to them. When Dorian's breathing slowed down, he continued down, fondling and stroking he rekindled his desire.

His hand switched with the other eliciting a whimper and gaining him a tug on the hair. He only interrupted his ministrations for a minute to uncap the small bottle and cover his left hand with it and without stopping his trail of kisses Trevelyan's slicked finger pressed onto Dorian's entrance.

"Don't tease so much. I might have to speed you up"

Tsion's mouth moved on to Dorian's, the chaste kiss turning into a savage one with his teeth biting Dorian's. Breathing and sharing his air, with no regrets and no more bindings to the past. When his finger pressed in Dorian ended  up breaking the kiss to shudder and grab a hold of the sheets. Tsion, happy with the response he was getting, spent little time with a single finger and added the second digit as soon as Dorian relaxed around him. The heat from the anchor spread through his fingers. While twisting his fingers and pulling them in and out, Dorian felt the energy moving along with it, providing a second, warmer source of heat. He lifted his hips prepared and keen for Tsion to move on.

With a small smile, Trevelyan obliged to adding a third finger and went in as deep as he can, hitting a spot and making the mage cry out in Tevene. The energy pulse emanated within Dorian with a steady rhythm in a way which was much better than when the anchor was on his cock. The foreign yet tingling energy felt like its sole purpose was to consume him, take away all that he was, tear him apart and leave him at the mercy of his lover. He had faith that Tsion would put him back together so he let go of the chains he once put on himself and moaned with desire.

"Do that again Amatus!" Dorian ordered and Tsion was happy to follow the directive. His feet began to curl after a few more thrusts and Tsion pulled out completely, leaving Dorian feeling empty at the sudden withdrawal. His cock was already leaking and Tsion didn't look like he minded it a bit as he leisurely covered his own length with the oil. The small content sounds he was making made Dorian curios about how to draw out more of those from Tsion. With one hand on his cock, eyes screwed shut and mouth ajar, Dorian wished that the man would stop being so irresistible and start fucking him already. When he voiced his thought, Tsion's lust full eyes opened and with one swift motion he lifted him with strong hands steady on Dorian's hips, angling him on his lap.

"Are you ready?" he asked one last time.

"Yes," Dorian horsed out, already reaching for the bed frame to hold on to. Tsion nodded then and pushed in ever so tenderly. Dorian moaned loudly and his nails scratched the wooden surface when Tsion buried his length deep within him. His possessive hold was back on his hips and Dorian took the moment to catch his breath. "Move" he ordered afterwards.

Tsion pulled back in a heartbeat and thrust back in an instant, making Dorian cry out. He didn't slow down and soon he was rocking in and out with a steadily increasing speed. A pressure built up in his groins. Unable to hold back and hands sliding on Dorian's sides in accordance with his thrusts, Tsion took in the arching body below him. Dorian's sweaty hair was stuck to his forehead and muscled torso was constricting with every move. Their move, Tsion thought as they melted into each other and rocked back and forth as one. Dorian pushing back and Tsion pushing in, as the bed creaked below them.

"Dorian" he muttered and grabbed his cock with his marked hand, earning a howl from Dorian which even he could feel it resonating between them.

"Almost there, Amatus" Dorian shrieked. He grabbed a hold of Tsion's neck and pulled him down for a sloppy kiss, giving him a chance to roam his free hands all over Dorian's well toned body. Once he got back to rest his hand on Dorian's length, he felt the young mage convulsing and tightening around him. As Dorian climaxed, Tsion's vision went bright with the pressure on his cock buried with Dorian. His hands continued rubbing his sensitive inner thighs and soon after Dorian was exhausted, Tsion spent himself into Dorian's expectant body.

He collapsed on Dorian who was breathing just as hard and felt the mage beam at him with an unreserved happiness. Tsion, after gathering his thoughts, leaned up and kissed Dorian slow and firm which he countered similarly. While their bodies continued to grind, together they cooled down. There were no words exchanged between them, just seeing the fond and peaceful gaze directed at him was enough to calm his beating heart.

With an apologetic kiss he pulled out of Dorian and got up from the bed to retrieve a wet cloth to clean themselves up with. He cleaned both him and his spent partner who snuggled his pillow like a content cat, short of purring. He got rid of the old sheet which they had messed up and grabbed another blanket from his wardrobe to cover them as he joined Dorian on the pillow.

"To have such a caring partner, I must have been very lucky, before" Dorian whispered with a slightly mused tone.

"It's _I_ who has been lucky" Trevelyan replied  with determination burning in his eyes "I never met anyone quite like you who could make me fall in love with them over and over again; in any given world and across any possible timelines. Trust me when I say this. I will always find you, love and now that I have you, nothing is dragging us apart"

"Possessive and poetic, you know how to melt my heart" Dorian gulped while stroking Tsion's cheek "Let us rest. Tomorrow will not be easy on us" Trevelyan nodded in agreement. There was still so many more issues that awaited them to be solved, that he really didn't want to think about.

Despite being unsure about many things, Dorian's existence by his side was comforting. Having not received a definite answer back for his confession, Trevelyan didn't know where to put his arms to sleep. As if he read his mind, Dorian pulled the hesitant man, draping an arm around his waist and taking the marked hand in his own. In his way Dorian was reciprocating and Trevelyan's features relaxed with contentment. Face to face, Tsion couldn't stop himself from leaning in to steal a chaste kiss.

"Good night, love" he said as his eyes closed on their own.

"Good night, Amatus" came the reply which Trevelyan had promptly missed as he was already far too gone in his sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: In DA:O, the characters of the unchosen origins exist along side your chosen Warden. They are usually mentioned with one line or alike but they each have their potential endings. For example if your warden was Amell, the circle mage, the Cousland you could have chosen from the human noble still exists and is mentioned as either killed during Howe's attack or escaped and remained in the shadows. Similarly all other origins have their own alternate endings besides your warden.  
> PS. I guess we all know what has happened the unchosen Inquisitor origins in the begining of DA:I.
> 
> PS. Also, does the anchor count as a kink?


	21. The whispers of the dead

* * *

 

As Trevelyan strode through Skyhold and tried to ignore the obvious looks he was getting, he tried to focus on happier things like remembering Dorian's sleeping face with his tousled hair and mild snores. He hated to leave the young mage and have him wake up alone in a cold room but duty beckoned. The threat still hanged above Thedas and there was lots of questions he undoubtedly was expected to answer.

 After a good night's sleep and without his anchor constantly trying to kill him, Trevelyan's stance had changed into a determined and bold march. Now that he retained all the aces about his past and present, he could move forward with a strong attitude. Even if his heart was wounded and he was hurt, he firmly believed that he wasn't broken. There was yet a future for him, for Dorian and for all his friends.

Cullen's troops were arriving to their stronghold in parts, with their Commander already up and about, yelling and ordering his soldiers their respective duties. The battle was won and the enemy was driven away but that didn't mean they got to have breaks. The wounded and the dead still needed to be attended.

Trevelyan nodded at the Commander as he walked down the stairs and into the outer garden. A couple of soldiers saluted him as he greeted Cullen and then scrambled away once their commander was distracted. "Don't be so hard on them, Cullen. You are scaring them away."

"We don't have the luxury to slack, Trevelyan. Corypheus was furious when he left the battlefield, who knows what he'll do next." he explained with slurring some of his words. The Herald wondered if Cullen had taken any sleep in the last two days. He had dark shadows under his eyes and his hands slightly trembled. So Trevelyan guessed that he hadn't even taken a rest in between battles.

"Either way, I am glad to see you made it through, Trevelyan. I wasn't certain I'd get to see you again"

"Same here, Cullen." Trevelyan answered and started walking in the direction of the throne room. "There is a war council meeting now, isn't there? I have heard from Lavellan that once you came in we would hold one."

"Yes, I have just been summoned" Cullen said and hesitation faltered  his steps "So, I am not sure of what I have heard so far. I have received an update from the scouts but in short-"

"The wisdom of the Well of Sorrows has been past down to me, my anchor has been balanced and I am stuck here, whether anyone likes it or not"

Cullen chuckled and Trevelyan whipped his head towards the unknown sound escaping Cullen's throat. "I highly doubt that anyone would oppose having you around, least of all the Inquisition's finest. Your accomplishments, although not as colourful as Lavellan's, have reached the people and they are hailing you as the second miracle send by the Maker to assist the Inquisitor in these dark days. I must admit that I agree with their sentiment."

"Cullen, I am-" Trevelyan swallowed thickly, touched deeply by his admission.

"You are welcome here, Trevelyan. Whether you like it or not, we are not giving you up." He was definitely blushing a dark shade of red which made Cullen's smile to widen further more. Perhaps they should tire out the commander more to get him to converse this openly.

By the main doors, Varric was sitting on a chair, tinkering with Bianca. He was startled to see Cullen smirking and dropped Bianca on to the table with a loud thud.

"Did I miss the part where Corypheus has died?" he asked, abashed.

"He isn't dead, yet" Trevelyan responded, frowning.

"Curly is smiling. I figured something of a large calibre must have happened!"

"Oh, I see what you mean. It gave me a scare as well" The Herald agreed despite Cullen's weak protests.

"You sound cheerful, Herald and you don't look half bad, either. After yesterday's endeavour I assumed you would be-"

"Moping alone in my quarters? Miserable enough to scare away Leliana's scouts? Honestly I had every intention to be just like that but someone broke through my defences."

"I can't ever guess who" Varric laughed "I hope you had a lovely night full of recovery and tender touches, then?"

"Yes" he answered simply, ignoring Cullen's obvious blush.

"We should head to the meeting room" he stammered "They must be waiting for us!" As he left first, Trevelyan caught Varric's wink.

"Seriously though. You gave us quite the scare in the Well, Herald. How are you holding up?"

"I'll be fine, Varric. In time, I'll be better"

"Alright, I'll trust your word. Just remember that we are here for you, if you ever need company. In the mean time I'll work hard to spread your miracles across Thedas."

*

The war room was already buzzing with the sounds of the advisors and their ideas bouncing off of each other. It was rather crowded with the addition of Morrigan, Cassandra and Solas to the usual trio and their Inquisitor, Lavellan.

"Then Corpheus is finished" Josephine assumed but she was countered by Leliana.

"If he is wise, he will hide and rebuild his strength before he attacks again." That sounded wrong to Trevelyan, like a whisper from the depths a voice spoke to him, confirming his intuition.

_He won't hide._

"He won't hide" he said with great conviction and all eyes in the room turned his direction.

"You hear it. The Well speaks to you" Morrigan dictated and it took him all his willpower to not to roll his eyes at her.

"Yeah, I have been hearing them for a while now. Do try to catch up, Morrigan." he mocked "They are more tamed now. Their sound comes from afar but I can understand them better as if they have finally calmed down enough to sound legible."

"They are no longer trying to kill you, you mean." Cassandra hissed.

"Thankfully we seem to have reached a compromise. Since there is no more poison in my veins trying to surpass them, they have withdrawn their death sentence on my head..." Morrigan had something more to say, perhaps raise her voice over the unfairness of losing her chance to obtain the wisdom for her own gain, but Cassandra was quicker.

"What has happened to our counterparts, Trevelyan? Are they still bound to the Well? Should we be leaving them there?"

He heard the voices whisper to him, demanding his attention upon hearing the question. Trevelyan closed his eyes and focused on the sounds of the ancients.

"They are gone now. Gone but not lost." he whispered with a pained expression "They merged with the times of this world and become a part of it. They are you."

"That sounds like something Cole would say" Lavellan remarked with a raised eyebrow. "You are not ascending into spirit-hood, are you?"

"No? I feel human enough" Trevelyan replied. "The situation is peculiar enough that I can't express it in my own words so I am borrowing the ancients'."

Cassandra's frown deepened "I don't feel any different than what I have felt before. How is it that they merged with us?"

"How would you even know if something changed within yourself?" Solas inquired "You can't. Perhaps they have always been there, watching and guiding us. Or they have appeared at the same time as Trevelyan but we can't possibly know it. One thing is for certain; now, they are a part of us rather than a part of the Well."

"What do you mean, Solas?" Lavellan asked the elf.

"When we were in the temple, our counterparts mentioned having been merged with the ancient magic. Upon accepting to carry the wisdom of the Well, Trevelyan obtained all of the voices of the ancients yet he does not hear his old companions because they are no longer there."

"That sounds both hopeful and tragic. Maybe they are still helping us after all. " Josephine marvelled "Lord Trevelyan, you look stricken. We can take a break if you require some time off."

Trevelyan shook his head. The whispers acted out once again, drawing his attention back to their main topic at hand. "I know what needs to be done in order to bring an end to Corypheus"

"Now, that is a definitive answer we have been searching for" Leliana said with a twinkle in her eyes.

"The dragon isn't an Archdemon. It's a dragon in which Corypheus has invested part of his power. Kill it, and his ability to jump to other bodies is disrupted for a time. He can be killed."

"That's... no simple task. Corypheus alone is powerful, but with his dragon..." she started but the voices were whispering in his mind once again.

"I need to summon Mythal." That remark made everyone fidget and Morrigan even bothered to question Mythal's existence but Trevelyan knew better than to ignore the request of the ancients. "There. An altar in the wilderness. That's where I need to go"

"I see you are determined. So be it" Morrigan commented before taking her leave. Cassandra let out a disgusted noise with which Trevelyan agreed.

"We'll sort out our defences and ready our troops." Lavellan commanded "In the mean time, you do everything in your power to learn how to stop the Dragon"

"I will" Trevelyan said and left to make his preparations.

*

The twilight glimmer drowned the green of the Emerald Graves in a golden hue. The rustling of the leaves and the sounds of small animals hiding within the deep forest was comforting enough for Trevelyan to relax his shoulders and breath in the fresh scents.

"We should consider camping while we have the chance, Herald" Varric called out as he slowed his horse to a halt. "This clearing looks less likely to smother us in our sleep."

"I concur" Dorian agreed and slowed down "Whatever is it that we are going to face, I don't want to face it without taking a proper night's sleep"

"We have come to visit an altar, love. I don't plan to battle any giants or I would have requested help from one of our fine warriors"

"The altar stands stranded, betrayed and alone. Broken and abandoned. Those who come to pray find nothing but the fractured statue of a deity." Cole grimaced and Trevelyan decided that stopping was the best option.

They prepared their camping ground with the help of two scouts that were tugging along with them and by the time they were finished, the night had fallen. Trevelyan grabbed a bowl of something that was served as the dinner and scooted closer to Dorian's seat by the fire. With his shoulder leaning on to the young mage's knees who was sitting on a log, Trevelyan stretched his legs and dug into his meal.

"So, Tsion" Dorian started sweetly "What earth shattering nightmare are we going to be facing tomorrow? The Goddess, Mythal or one of her minions?"

"It's a surprise" Trevelyan snickered to himself and Dorian tangled his fingers in his hair, stroking and paying special attention to the sensitive skin of his nape.

"So, you _do_ know what awaits us! Any hints as to what it is so we can prepare for it? I'd hate to end up dead because of a shock"

"Oh, it will be a shock but nothing we can't handle, love. Trust me."

"That statement makes me even more worried." He said while increasing the pressure of his hold. Trevelyan groaned at the action as his shoulders slumped down and he  leaned further into the touch.

"Let's eat up and retreat to our tent?" he asked and Dorian was more than ready to nod in agreement. The bowls were cleaned in mere minutes and Trevelyan almost bodily lifted Dorian and together they disappeared into the tent furthest from the fire.

"Try not to be too loud. We'll all need to sleep tonight!" Varric yelled out after them, causing the young scouts to blush feverishly.

"They are happy" Cole stated "Glittering to gloss a hidden hurt. Unlearning not to hope for more. Stumbling steps where the wall used to be."

"Is that for Sparkler or for the Herald?" Varric inquired, unsure of its intended target.

"Both grow with each step they take. Together, the voices are dimmed and they can be their own before they are anyone else's. The whispers beyond the time rest, content to be with them once again."

Varric drew in a deep breath before letting out a chuckle. "I think that's enough poetry for me tonight, kid. Let me tell you a story instead."

"I love your stories, Varric. Your eyes shine as bright as your heart when you tell them."

"Of course, kid. A storyteller who doesn't enjoy his work can never make it as far as I have. So, there was this one time when Hawke was _invited_ to Chateau Haine..."

*

"That's a lovely statue" Dorian commented dryly at the vast empty space with only a broken statue of Mythal standing before them. The altar was in a bad shape such as Cole had mentioned before with its stand covered in vines and half its glory buried under a dense layer of leaves and flowers.

Trevelyan stepped on to the altar, ignoring his remark and started examining the remnants with great interest. Jokes on him, Dorian thought with pleasure as he eyed the red bite mark on his lover's neck. Red suited him so well.

"We few who travel far, call to me, and I will come. Without mercy. Without fear." Trevelyan read and observed the altar some more "This place is beautiful."

"Yes, quite so. Now what?" Dorian asked with an impatient voice. "What are we waiting for? Is there no Mythal? Was she killed too? Could Corypheus even do that; kill a Goddess?"

"No, she isn't dead" Trevelyan replied, focused on listening something Dorian couldn't hear "I can feel her presence. Oh, I see. You lot wait here for a bit!" 

"Where are you running off to on your own?" Dorian squeaked but Trevelyan has already left the field with eliciting two surprised gasps. Cole's mouth opened ajar but he closed it with his own hand. Hiding his words behind it. "Do you know what he is up to, Cole?"

"Yes, but I can't speak of it. Please don't ask!" Cole begged and Dorian crossed his arms, utterly exhausted. He was tempted to bribe the spirit with a new hat.

"Perhaps, you should have asked him at the end of your passionate night, Sparkler." Varric said with a smug smile. Dorian chose not to dignify that with an answer. There was no movement for ten minutes as they simply walked around. By the end of the tenth minute, Dorian was frowning unhappily until a screeching echoed above their heads.

Gulping and jumping to his feet, Dorian gripped his staff with an undying strength as a large dragon, with its black and red skin and giant wings floated in the sky. Varric was cursing on the side and Cole had already cloaked himself in smoke. The high dragon landed on the edge of the rocks above the altar, its legs unbalanced but strong in their grip. It's large, red stripped horns and sharp teeth stood proudly above them as it opened its jaw letting out a blood roar and puffing out fire through its nose.

While it watched them with a growl, all Dorian could think was the fear and possibility of having lost Tsion to this beast. He couldn't understand where it had come from. When Trevelyan first called out to Mythal nothing had happened. Had his _heroic spirited_ lover left to find this creature and succeed in waking it up? If so, where was Tsion now? Had this dragon taken him?

Panicked and hurting, he let out a battle cry startling his companions.

" Festis bei umo canavarum! If you have killed my Tsion, if you have harmed him in any way, I will skin you myself you beast!" he yelled and with the way it huffed, Dorian could swear that the high dragon was laughing at him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost there; the final events start now and if I can keep up with my writing, the story will be concluded before the week's up. Wish me luck!


	22. Taming a dragon

* * *

 

The dragon flapped its black wings, unearthing some dust and blowing the leaves around as he took off. It roamed the sky without losing its prey from its sight and circled above them, cleverly dodging Varric's arrows. His balance was slightly off, Dorian noticed. Perhaps Trevelyan had wounded the creature before... whatever has happened to him.

A stream of strong fire heated the air as the dragon blew through its mouth. It hadn't aimed at them but Dorian still felt his magic tingling at his fingertips with fright. It flew around some more and he was certain that this was a cat and mouse game to it.

When it decided to come down, the dragons silver nails shone far too close in the space above the enclosure of the altar. Its large limps swung past them without actually touching and as Varric aimed his weapon, unsure whether they should be killing the beast without the Herald. What if this was what they came here for?

While hovering above the clearing, The large wings flattered inwards, creating a wind tornado below itself. The wind's pull wasn't strong but it was enough to unbalance their stance and Dorian's first instinct was to cast a barrier around them all. Having had it with indecision, Varric lifted his weapon but before he could pull the trigger Cole appeared between them, startling the dwarf.

"Get out of the way, kid!" he yelled but Cole's attention was at the dragon. The dragon lifted his mighty head roaring and flapped his wings one last time before a smoke with a colour darker than any Cole or Lavellan ever created with their grenades, covered the beast. The thick air swirled upwards until it drowned and hid the dragon behind its blackness. An energy surge got past Dorian and he felt the arcane shift around them.

The ground shone a deep blue below the beast and the smoke slowly dissipated from above. As it was lowered down towards the earth, all that was left was a much smaller bundle which in no time scattered around and Trevelyan landed on his two human feet, his black and red armour floating backwards with the strength of the feral arcane flow.

"You-" Dorian started but he couldn't really finish his sentence. In his mind, a hundred Tevene curses were lined up along with a thousand endearments. He simply couldn't decide which ones to yell at Trevelyan's face first. Varric beat him to it.

"You, nug humping bastard! I was this close from nailing you in the heart!" he yelled but lowered Bianca at the same time.

"They are not happy," Cole said with a panic stricken expression, "You said they would like your surprise but they are angry!"

"I might have exaggerated with being happy part but they are definitely surprised!" Trevelyan said in return.

"Might?" Dorian sneered with his voice getting high pitched as every time he was both surprised and outraged would do. With his stillness unfrozen, he strode towards the panicking mage who had his hands stretched out in a defensive position. "I thought we were going to get roasted for a minute there. And I wouldn't even get a chance to see you... This is the second time you do this to me! Are you trying to-? What was the point in that?"

"I wanted to surprise you?" Dorian, the scholar and an ever apprentice to the arcane arts, never took pleasure in hurting those he loved. It was both an act unbecoming of his status and something he promised himself that he would not subject his dear ones to the same anger his father had made him feel. Anything that would be considered as an emotional hurt was out of boundaries when it came to Trevelyan too. Yet, yet... he took great pleasure when he leaned backwards and threw his strongest right punch, connecting it with Trevelyan's smug face.

"I hate you so much!" he screamed as his beloved one lost his balance and stumbled a few steps back with his lips bleeding nonstop. The smile was wiped off of his face but the amused twinkle remained in Trevelyan's eyes as if he was impressed with the young mage's right hook. Dorian narrowed his eyes in annoyance, tusked and marched him past.

"That summarises my feeling exactly," Varric commented but he was also busy snickering, "You never fail to surprise me, Herald"

"Well, now that my oracleness became ineffective, I thought a fresh talent would be most welcomed! Also, I can turn into turn into a dragon, so that's a plus." Varric laughed to his heart's content and Trevelyan knew all was forgiven. Now if only he could say the same about Dorian...

"I'll drink to that. Wait until Hawke gets a whip of that rumour! You won't have anywhere to hide until you spill all your secrets of the draconology, Herald. And don't worry about Sparkler, he'll come around. You just scared the living shit out of us"

"Sorry about that but I couldn't miss on such an opportunity. Why do you think I didn't bring all any of our heavy hitters who would behead me with a single blow."

Cole was smiling next to them as they started back and Trevelyan couldn't wait to go back to camp. Dorian, as expected, was still sulking in a far away corner. Without a word, Varric poked his ribs and tilted his head in Dorian's direction and Trevelyan braced himself as he approached the fuming mage.

"Love?" Trevelyan called out.

"Don't _love_ me, you ass!" Dorian exclaimed, with his arms crossed over his chest. The Herald had half a mind to not to touch him as the arcane energy intensified around them.

"I am sorry, Dorian. I didn't mean to scare you," he said in hopes of reconciliation. When all Dorian did was to humph at him, Trevelyan decided to explain himself, "After we got through Eluvian, Lavellan and Morrigan wanted to discuss the situation at hand."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Dorian asked, clearly remembering that at the same time he was busy drinking and listening about Tsion's past predicament from Varric.

"Well, while we were talking one of the Chantry Mother's screamed for help. Apparently, Morrigan's son had decided to run off and play in the Fade. So naturally, we followed."

"You have done what?" Dorian spun around. If possible he was even more furious than he was a second ago. "You ventured into the Fade out of your own discretion? Are you insane?"

"We didn't know it leads to the Fade, Dorian!"

"I had warned Lavellan of its dangers. Did my warning fell on deaf ears?"

"We were simply searching for a lost boy who turned out to be carrying a bit of the Old Gods. Or something like that. I kind of lost who was what when Flemeth appeared and introduced herself as Mythal..."

"You are not making this up, are you?" Dorian asked but he had adorned the tired face of a man who had seen too much and was ready to believe anything at this point. Trevelyan felt terrible for pulling his earlier stunt and adding to the layers of exhaustion on Dorian's posture.

"It turns out she has united with the Goddess long ago and since I drank from the Well, I was named her servant of sorts. She controlled me to stop Lavellan's advances when she tried to attack Flemeth. It seems I have broken my chains with the circle, only to end up handing my leash to a supreme ancient being. This is a bond I cannot shake off"

"Oh, Amatus" Dorian sighed and leaned in until his arms were around Trevelyan's shoulders and their foreheads were touching. "I know how much you wished to break free of this insatiable world which wants nothing but to bound and gag us. You have done remarkably well for anyone in your position and here I am ruining the only enjoyment you found in all this mess."

"It isn't the only enjoyment, you know," Trevelyan wiggled his eyebrows pointedly, earning a smile in return. "Let's return and sit by the fire. I am sure you'll want to hear the rest"

"Of course I do." Dorian nodded, "Why a dragon though? How did that come to be?"

"Good question, Sparkler," added Varric who was sitting on a log by Cole's side. "We get it, you are an unstoppable force of nature not to be reckoned with. But a dragon? That's a whole other story."

"A grateful but pitiful deity watches over you now. Once she tasted the bitterness of betrayal and now she is ashamed to have offered it. A gift, she thinks; she believes. Because she has to. You cannot take anything that is not willfully given. You cannot give anything without losing something in return."

"What Cole means is; " Trevelyan started "after Lavellan's outburst, Flemeth made to capture Kieran and we couldn't stay silent. Flemeth, or Mythal, could stop me with a single thought, limiting my magic as well, so of course, on principle, I yelled at her to shove it all up her arse. Both the bond and the elven markings. She was amused with that, said she liked my enthusiasm which pissed of Morrigan and Lavellan more."

"Naturally" Dorian agreed and put a hand on Trevelyan's thigh, grounding him.

"We failed to stop her at the end. She was in every sense of the word, a Goddess. Kieran wasn't lost though. Flemeth only took the Old God bit from him and that was it. She didn't harm anyone of us. Though, she was rather grim during the exchange and she decided to help us. Originally, she told me to tame her dragon."

"Leave it to a Goddess to own a pet dragon" Varric commented.

"I know right!" Trevelyan chuckled and then cleared his throat, starting to play with Dorian's fingers in the absence of something to fiddle with "Well, I really didn't mean to do it but I sort of yelled at her again. Told her that it wasn't fair to send us _mortals_ to fight of an ancient being while she watched from the shadows. She obviously didn't have any means to turn us into immortals without corrupting us so instead as a means to settle the trouble between us, she offered to teach me how to turn into a dragon using the power from the Well. Because I was a mage and had the potential to learn shapeshifting, it would be possible for me to transform into a beast that could go head to head with Corypheus' pet."

"So it's the Well's magic that allows you a transfiguration of such calibre? Fascinating! You'll have to tell me more about it later on"

"Of course, love. Does that mean you are forgiving me?" Trevelyan asked while smiling innocently and he could pinpoint the exact moment when it was all forgiven as Dorian's shoulders slouched and he exhaled a sigh.

"Yes, Tsion but don't even think about doing this in Skyhold. There is not enough magic in this world to keep the Iron Bull and half of Inquisition attack you on sight."

"Sparkler is right" Varric added and stretched in his seat, popping a few joints back into their places. "One more thing before I leave you alone, Herald. If Flemeth was going to teach you how to be a dragon and you could meet her in whatever's in the mirror, why on earth have we bothered to come all the way to the altar?"

"To readjust my energy flow" Trevelyan explained "I am not a shapeshifter, as you know but a battlemage and a rift mage. To be a shapeshifter you need years of study amongst the species of your choice and learn their way. Eventually becoming them. We don't have the time as a luxury so I was given a sped up study instead. The ancients whispered that there was a hidden, secondary altar above the rocks. When I checked there, Mythal appeared."

"Those who come to pray find nothing but the fractured statue of a deity," Cole repeated his earlier words "because time tames any shame and all of the prideful. Only the truly devoted remains."

"Pretty much" The Herald responded "Mythal gave me an amulet to let me control the transformation for a while. It will break eventually but I can learn how to do it myself in the mean time. She even gave me a few pointers but I am not exactly confident in myself yet. I'll focus on it more without the amulet when I have time if we beat Corypheus and have a future that is."

"Now that we have you, I believe our chances have greatly improved. We should reconsider our bet Varric" Dorian cheered and Trevelyan's heart melted down to a puddle, brows drawn to form a worried line. "Don't give me that look. As you like to say so very often, Amatus; we will be alright."

And Trevelyan believed what he just heard.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Q: Has anyone finished Origins without doing Morrigan's ritual? I hadn't so I don't know how she or the lack of her son, Kieran plays into the storyline. So I sort of glossed over their meeting with Flemeth. Feel free to ask me about details if you get confused.


	23. The stuff of legends

* * *

 

"So where is your staff?" asked Varric well into journey for the way back. Trevelyan fidgeted on his mount and a red tinge adorned his face.

"Lost. Sort of." Varric shot him a pointed look "It was burned to a crisp when I first transformed into a dragon and discovered that I had fire breath..." Knowing that Varric was holding back from laughing out loud, Trevelyan focused on the road with a deadly intensity. "Did I mention that I can turn into a dragon? Because I can and I won't hold back from doing so!"

"Shame about the staff. You had crafted it yourself and it was rather well made" commented Dorian, trying to cheer him up.

"Thank you, Dorian" he replied with a diplomatic tone "And if you don't stop snickering, dwarf, I am going to be breathing fire down your ass!" Varric laugh got louder and even Dorian joined in, desperately trying to hide his face while making Trevelyan growl and roll his eyes. He should have just lied about the damn thing but it did feel good to hear his friends' laughing voices once again.

"Everyone is happy and bantering naturally. This is good!" Cole said. "Oh, look Skyhold! We can share the happiness now"

"Do you want to make another dramatic entrance, Herald? Spread your wings and glide through the Sky?"

"No way! I am not becoming targeting practice for Cullen's men and their trebuchets." He opposed, suddenly fearing the outcomes of pulling such a stunt in Skyhold. With all of the inquisition's best and finest alarmed and ready to battle, he wouldn't survive the minute.

True to her word, Lavellan had the stronghold alerted keeping every lingering man and woman busy with something. Cullen and Lavellan's impressive army was still returning from the Arbor Wilds and majority of them were nowhere in sight. What remained of the personal guards and the few soldiers had gathered in the outer gardens of the Skyhold. Ready to march into enemy territory, no matter how little their number were, the soldiers had geared up. Most had determined faces with a hidden nervousness and some were downright sad, even afraid to face what came next. Even Bull's Charges seemed to be on the edge and that was saying something. Trevelyan didn't blame them for fearing the final battle with such a small army. Even with all the shit he had learned and the stuff he could do, he was still terrified of facing Corypheus' dragon.

He should have practiced being a dragon more before reaching Skyhold.

With a sigh he dismounted and left his horse in the capable hands of Master Dennett. From the way the tension was vibrating around Skyhold and how everyone was anxious to do something, anything, it was obvious to Trevelyan that the end was near. It was time to face their ultimate opponent lest doom fell upon the world.

He shared a knowing glance with Dorian and Varric alone, Cole already had disappeared, and he left for the war room one last time before the main event.

"Was the summoning... successful, Trevelyan?" Leliana asked as soon as he joined the conversation. The rest of the advisors and their Inquisitor was already in the midst of planning their final assault; the map was laid out with various pin attached to it; completed missions were marked and only their destination remained unmarked, he imagine that the small dagger imbedded in the middle of the map was meant to be saved for that location.

The advisors were also nervous but with years of experience came the will of steel which toughened his comrades. As tense as they appeared, Trevelyan knew that they were more than ready as well.

"You have no idea, Leliana" he answered with a smirk.

"But you found what you needed?" she inquired further more.

"Oh yes and much more than that"

"Will you tell us if you learned how to become a Dragon or not?" Lavellan intercepted "We really don't have time to be fooling around" The advisors' gasps made him smile further but he managed to face Lavellan with a displeased scowl.

"Way to ruin my surprise, Inquisitor" he said, the word _Inquisitor_ still foreign to his tongue. "I had a whole plan of spreading my wings in the courtyard, dropping trebuchets off the walls and burning a massive bonfire in preparation for the winter. Now I have to make do with lighting Blackwall's beard on fire only..."

"You spend way too much time with Dorian and Varric. Their bad jokes have rubbed off on you" Cullen commented light heartedly. Lavellan was quick to shoot him a warning glare. "Anyways, as you have completed your mission then all that remains is to find Corypheus before he comes to us"

Ideas were thrown around and as Cullen was voicing his thoughts the ground beneath their feet shook, while strong, abnormal coloured beams infiltrated the war room, illuminating it with a green hue. Time stopped for Trevelyan, he felt the fear rapidly accumulating the room, panicked eyes searching through the green light for the source of their distress. It didn't take them long to spot the fearsome tear in their sky, shining with its emerald shade like a fine silk suspended and circling between two worlds.

His hand shivered with a familiar pain and the matching coloured hand glowed, it's pure energy pulling towards its kin. His own fears began to surface as he saw Lavellan's hand raised up just like his. The advisors stared at them both, unable to comfort either.

"Corypheus. Either we close that breach again, or it swallows the world. We have to bury that bastard before he advances further" Lavellan declared with a scowl.

"But that's madness! Wouldn't it kill him as well?" Josephine exclaimed.

"I think he is beyond sanity at this point. It's all or nothing; for him and for us both." Trevelyan added in and leaned over the war map pulling the dagger and handing it to Lavellan. "We have no forces to bring along with us but we have a plan and a means to an end. We can finish this and beat him in his own game. If nothing else, that bastard will never see me coming and torching his sorry ass"

"I like how you think, Herald" Lavellan smirked "While you beat the shit out of his dragon we'll distribute our available sources, especially our inner circle and distract Corypheus. Once the dragon is down, Corypheus dies." She thrust the dagger down and impaled it on a point near the edge of Fereldan, close to the border of the two kingdom and the empire. Her strong determination boosted even Trevelyan's own resolve. "I'll take Cassandra, Iron Bull and Dorian up front. I want the rest of our finest close by and fighting of the waves of pressure. Second line of battle will be Solas, Varric, Vivienne and Blackwall. I want Sera and Cole off of the ground where they can do the most damage with the least visibility. If all else falls then it's up to them to finish this up. As for you Lord Trevelyan, I expect you to deal with the dragon in record time and come help us clean up the remnants of Corypheus once and for all."

"Oh, I wouldn't miss it."

"If the plan is decided, I suggest we start making our final preparations and head out." Josephine suggested and all around heads nodded in agreement.

"Oh by the way" Trevelyan suddenly jerked his head towards them "I need a new weapon. I sort of lost the last one"

*

"You got yourself a staff but are you going to be able to use it once you transform?" Dorian asked as approached Trevelyan in the Undercroft and took a hold of the weapon. Twirling it between his fingers, he measured its strength and durability with arcane energy bolting across its surface "I must say, I have seen far better crafting from you. It's grip probably won't hold for long under duress."

"I don't plan on using it" Trevelyan replied gripping the staff just above Dorian's hands and pulling both them closer to his body. "It's just a precaution. I am going to leave the fighting with evil magister to you and take on the big bad fire breather. It's all around symbolic, you see?" Removing the staff from between their shared space, Trevelyan grasped Dorian's waist, standing close enough until they shared the same breath as well. "Who better to fight of a corrupted Tevinter Magister than his own country's pariah?"

"I am certain the Inquisitor will also play a part in it. Let's not downplay her role in this. It would be rude of us" He said while leaning his forehead against Trevelyan's, his hands playing with the worn out armour's collar.

"I wouldn't dare." Trevelyan said absentmindedly. His breathing had evened out despite the slight tremble in his hands. To think that they have reached the ending so soon, both excited and scared him. There were so many ways that this could have played out, so many conclusions where most of them ended badly for him or Dorian in his mind.

The voices of the ancients had been silent since their visit to the altar and it didn't help calming his nerves down. If anything it was a way of telling him that even the ancients had done all they could. How the finale would end depended entirely on them and were they to fall, it would be because of their own mortal incompetence.

The Inquisition was nowhere near incompetent but they had never went head to head with an old god-wanna-be asshole who commanded the power of the ancient Elvhen magic and could create veils with a whip of his hand. This would be their greatest test up to date and of all the things that could be lost, the amount of people that could die and kingdoms that could fall, the one thing that really scared Trevelyan was losing the man in his arms. The rest be damned, if Dorian were to fall in this battle, he didn't think he could survive that kind of pain. Not again.

Trevelyan wrapped his arms around Dorian tighter as his thoughts grow more grim by the second. His head fall on the young mage's shoulder, nose buried in his neck, simply breathing in. Dorian smelled of fresh grass and smoke, remnants of the road trip they had but underneath it all his unique scent, a combination of old books and fine whiskey still lingered. He committed them to his memory noticing that Dorian's hold on him had grown more firm as well.

"There you go again," the young man started "over thinking; Worrying about a future that hasn't happened yet nor will it come to pass. Fearing and making up endings that don't fit the story. Varric would be most displeased."

"As much as I like the dwarf, right now I really don't want to talk about him." Trevelyan mumbled into his neck, kissing the warm skin. Dorian giggled at the ticklish feeling and earned himself a bite.

"Ow... This is hardly the place for foreplay, Amatus. Unless you want to give the mice a display?" Trevelyan smirked and his tongue darted out to lick at the reddish bite mark on Dorian's neck, making him shiver as he lightly sucked on the spot. Once satisfied that it was going to last long enough, he kissed the mark and moved his lips upwards. Tracing the delicate chin, and the high cheekbones, he pressed his lips on Dorian's soft skin, trying to convey the entirety of the love he felt. Once Dorian's soft gasps reached his ear, he didn't hold back from ravishing  the inviting mouth before him. He grasped Dorian's head while stroking the young man's hip with his other hand and lead them towards the table.

Dorian's legs parted to accommodate his partner when he felt Trevelyan lift him slightly and sat him on the edge of the crafting table. He pushed Trevelyan towards him with pressing the sole of his feet on to back of the man's knees, causing him to buckle forward. Dorian chuckled as Trevelyan supported himself with holding on to him and once the mage regained his posture, in an attempt for revenge, Trevelyan's hands shifted down to his hips pulling him flush against his own body. As Dorian parted his mouth to let out a whimper mixed in with a smile, Trevelyan tilted his head and captured Dorian's lower lip, biting hard. That got a moan out of the young man with effectively silencing his snickering.

The air grew hotter as Trevelyan's hips thrust up, creating an unholy friction between the two of them. They could feel every knot and buckle on each other's clothes, the offending fabrics becoming more of a nuisance by each passing second. The dripping sounds of the waterfall behind them were dulled by the drumming of their hearts. Dorian lost his senses as the hands on his lower side gripped with an unforgiving force while Trevelyan's hot tongue explored his mouth. He had half a mind not to beg Trevelyan to lay him down on the table and let him have his way with him. But only half. The remaining parts of him pleaded inwardly for more desperate touches and soul consuming kisses. Fearing that this might be the last time they ever melted in each other's arms, Dorian halted Trevelyan's humping and cupped his flushed face with his palms.

"Amatus," he whispered without opening his eyes. Their noses touched gently "We'll make it through."

"Yes, we will" he heard the hoarse reply and calloused fingers were on Dorian's cheeks, wiping away tears that Dorian hadn't realized he had been shedding. "Open your eyes, Dorian" He did as he was told but with great difficulty and as his eyes fluttered open more tear droplets rolled down his face. Too tired to feel ashamed he let them be.

"Why am I even crying? This is so unbecoming of me..."

"It's alright, love" Trevelyan said as he wiped his face again "I am afraid, too"

"Oh that's why... I'm simply afraid." Dorian laughed "This was such a foreign concept, once. I hope you are happy to make me feel these unwarranted emotions."

"Yes, I am. Especially since the feelings are mutual." They held on to each other for some time, foreheads touching and fingers simply feeling the other one. Dorian's eyes never left Trevelyan's, as he leaned in to put a chaste kiss on his lips, mesmerized by his intense gaze. He smiled as he backed away, slicked back a stray hair on Trevelyan's temple and caressed his scalp.  With passion cooled down between them, all Dorian wanted to do for the next day was to wrap himself around Trevelyan and sleep through the battle, away from the danger. He scolded himself for even thinking about it but it didn't diminish the simple desire to kidnap Trevelyan and hide him in the far corners of Thedas until someone, or even himself had dealt with the problems.

"You are thinking something bad" Trevelyan commented warily.

"Yes, but don't worry I won't act on it. Not until we defeat the evil and win the day." He replied and cleaned his face with Trevelyan's sleeve.

"I'll trust you then" chuckled Trevelyan and made a weak attempt to save his armour. They were still smiling at each other when a cough echoed in the Undercroft, making them to jump out of their skin. A blushing Dagna stood at the centre of the room, with her eyes cast sideways, feet fidgeting and fingers flying up in the air as she started to blabber on about something.

"Take a deep breath, Dagna and start over" Trevelyan called out kindly, attracting her gaze to fall upon them which made the poor dwarf go red up to her ears. "Ah, sorry" he said as his hand went to pry off Dorian's leg from his waist. The young man made a second startled noise as he hadn't even realized how securely he had been holding Trevelyan until the mage tried to back away. With a cough he released the man and got up from the table to stand proudly by Trevelyan who was busy trying to frown seriously for the sake of appearances.

"I am never ever going to look at that table the same way ever again" Dagna remarked and a strangled noise was heard from their side, somehow making the girl smirk at them. "Anyway, as I was trying to say, Lady Inquisitor called for all of the Inner Circle to gather outside so maybe you should go as well. I think they are ready to move out."

"Thank you, Dagna" Trevelyan said with an impressive diplomat voice, grabbed Dorian's forearm and bolted out towards the door.

"Good luck" the dwarf yelled after them as they moved past her "And don't forget your staff, Herald!"

"Oh, with that blasted staff..." Dorian heard Trevelyan complain and return all the way back to the crafting table to retrieve the said weapon. He couldn't help but snicker as Dagna waved at them pointedly.

Trevelyan didn't even bother to stop walking hastily until they were safely outside. Once they reached their companions in the courtyard, with their serious faces and scowling brows, both of their smiles dropped. As the Inquisitor gave a short speech and brought everyone up to date, their expressions reflected only an unwavering but hopeful resolution.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A light hearted chapter before we move on to the finale (which I haven't finished yet).  
> PS. I was thinking of adding a few more chapters regarding Trevelyan's first encounters with the rest of the inner circle during his imprisonment in Skyhold. I haven't written much about Sera, Vivienne, Blackwall or how they met with Tsion so I want to give it a try. If you have a special request for someone, let me know!


	24. Amongst the dark clouds

* * *

 

A bloody castle... Of course they would find Corypheus in a dark, abandoned castle that was ready to collapse in on itself. Trevelyan never would have expected anywhere else. It was almost way too easy to track the bastard down or rather to follow the burnt corpses he had left in his wake after reaching the general area under the breach. There was simply no time to check if there was anyone that could be saved and he hated himself for it.

So many dead and dying... The road ahead was filled with countless bodies and the dreaded stench of death. They travelled through such paths filled with anguish for so long that he was certain the smell had permanently stuck on him and he would have no chance but the burn his armour, including his boots, once they returned to Skyhold to be rid of it.

They had abandoned their mounts in a temporary camp area which was set up in a safe distance from the breach. Upon reaching atop of the first set of stairs, the secondary group took their positions to fend off any enemy that could attack them from behind. Upon the next set of stairs they could hear Corypheus' lamenting. There were soldiers laying around and another one rolled down the steps, gasping and letting out a dying breath.

Upon hearing more screams Lavellan headed the primary group upstairs without delay and Dorian and Trevelyan shared a last longing look before starting to move and face their enemy. A few steps were still left when Trevelyan narrowed his eyes. He decided to keep to the shadows, following Cole's lead and he hid behind the large rocks. He didn't pay much attention to what the magister was saying but it sounded like a whining spoiled child who didn't know when to quit being a brat. Someone threw a grenade at Corypheus, the area was drowned in black smoke and their final battle began in earnest.

Corypheus, as before, seemed unaffected by their blows. From his hiding place Trevelyan casted a barrier around the Bull and Cassandra while Dorian was busy protecting the Inquisitor who was trying to flank the enemy. Without revealing his position he moved behind the rocks, casting restorative spells where needed. He could hear the clacking noises from the lower platform as well and despite his urge to go help them out properly, he halted himself and waited patiently for his own target to enter the arena.

He didn't have to wait long. When Corypheus felt the pressure of consecutive attacks from the Inquisitorial team, he yelled at the sky demanding to be worshipped. The ground quaked and suddenly everyone lost their balance as the whole castle was lifted upwards towards the breach, into a mass of black clouds. Rocks broke down from the sides of the ancient castle compound and it was thanks to Cole that he didn't fall down the same way. For a second he had completely forgotten that he could grow wings and it was definitive that he would turn to paste had he lost balance.

That would have made a short and embarrassing ending for him.

Unfazed by abruptly finding themselves airborne, Lavellan charged Corypheus and the bastard finally screamed and disappeared just to appear a second later on top of the broken battlements. As he moved up on the tower, he spread his arms to call down his high dragon. Cassandra and the Bull were already on his tail by the time he had completed his summoning.

While Lavellan followed her cowardly foe with great determination, Trevelyan walked a few steps inwards. Dorian spared a second for him on the first step of the stairs much to his pleasure. The young mage mouthed a "Be careful" to him which Trevelyan reciprocated the sentiment with the same amount of love and watched as Dorian turned around to follow his Inquisitor up the stairs.

"You nail that bastard dragon good, yeah!" Sera called out to him and Cole gave a small but encouraging smile as they too disappeared from his sight.

The dragon screeched above him and he nailed his staff on the ground near a large rock with a loud tuck. The amulet around his neck was solid and vibrating with immense power as he focused on his transformation. Near the edge of the floating castle, he felt a nervousness bubble up inside his chest but he quickly swallowed it down as the voices of his battling comrades reached him. Tightening his palms into fists, he exhaled the deep breath he had been holding and stepped off the edge.

He had thought that the transformation would be as smooth and as natural as he had done it the first time but boy, was he wrong. The wind licked at his face as he fell down the vast emptiness. Why hadn't he attempted to change while standing safe and secure atop the lonely platform? Because Tsion Trevelyan was a dumbass... but alas he was there, he was falling and he had little choice but to make due. He was grateful for being brought so high up by Corypheus otherwise he would already be paste by the time he remembered not to scream but to focus.

Then it was easier, the amulet took over his will, his muscles constricted and felt every second of magic engulfing his very being, changing and reshaping what he was. In the second that his energy was focused on his transformation, he found himself drowning on it. Forced by the amulet's interaction he centred the energy in his body and expanded it across the Sky, his body growing with it. Wings shot out from his back, leather covered his skin and nails grew out of his claws; large and strong. His mark's glow remained as a insignificant glint on his bulky palm.

With a flap of his black wings, and using his impressive set of horns he, as a high dragon, glided above the earth and rose back up to the castle. He passed over Varric's group with Vivienne, Solas and Blackwall, who were readily aiming at him but thanks to the dwarf they were prevented from sending their arcane bolts at him. As thanks, he roasted the next wave of the undead that was approaching his companions.

On top of the second platform he met with the other dragon which was getting ready to rain red arcane energy on Lavellan. Once he saw the dragon he understood why Vivienne was fast to go into a defensive position when she saw him. The enemy dragon looked erringly similar under the darkness of the falling night with only the breach providing a fake light. Their skins were both covered with dark leather with his strips being red smears, and his enemy's being grey. It also had a more bony structure and a mean huff, acting on pure instinct completely devoted to its master.

Trevelyan's mind was clouded, he didn't feel like a human anymore and he found himself following his instincts to fight rather than to think and plan. He screeched at the dragon and his upper claws impaled themselves on to the creatures wing as he glided over them. With all the newly gained strength he threw it across the castle and flew after its falling body.

It was an odd sensation, his mind being overwhelmed with a thirst for his enemy's blood. He could still hear Corypheus' obnoxious yells, aimed to taunt his companions but he couldn't bring himself to care. All he wanted to do was to rip that dragon's throat out.

His glowing claw shot out in an effort to do just that but the element of surprise was lost as the high dragon regained its balance while it was airborne. His right wing was wounded but that didn't affect nor bother his enemy. Letting out a hiss, Trevelyan dove in, and spreading his wings wide above the dragon he slowed his fall and breathed down all the fire at the enemy that he managed to let out.

With a shriek and smoke coming out of its ears, the dragon growled and flapped his own wings effectively both escaping the fire stream and redirecting it towards Trevelyan. He cursed as the dragon bodily hit his stomach but was quick to retaliate with throwing a claw at the dragon eyes and drawing dark blood. Unable to sustain their flight both dragons flew off in opposite directions only to meet again somewhere above Corypheus who was running away on the tower alone. Trevelyan took the opportunity and swatted at the dragons nose and being still a human deep down, he fisted his palm, hovering above the dragon and threw a punch right across its huge jaw while kicking with his right foot. Surprised and unprepared for such an attack the dragon's balance was lost.

Unlike Trevelyan's plan though, it managed to avoid hitting Corypheus and instead it connected with the highest empty area above the tower. Annoyed, Trevelyan breathed fire down on them both. He made the mistake of hovering on his spot for too long. As fire subsided and he saw Corypheus' own barrier up and strong, protecting them, it was too late to escape the oncoming attack form the high dragon. An intense arcane energy got him square on the chest, unwinding the air form his lungs. An agonised cry broke through his throat and he felt sharp nails ripping his skin.

Afraid of exposing his neck for the enemy his wings moved downwards and he let his body fall backwards, avoiding the snapping jaw of the dragon by a few inches.

He heard Dorian's scream and his heart hurt but his instincts were telling him to fight on. As he arched he neck, he made a full turn and with a harsh flap, his wings created the necessary momentum to raise back up. He got as high as the castle, past them by and continued forward, into the dark clouds, successfully attracting the dragon to move along with him.

When he got close enough to feel the breach pulling at his mark he stopped his ascension, turned around and with wings slacked back he dove back in, gaining speed and strength, as he aimed at the high dragon. His marked claw shot out to grasp its defensive position and at high speed together they collided with the platform below.

The impact dazed Trevelyan, he retained his bestial form but he wasn't used to being thrown around so much. When he gathered his wits he realized that the dragon was moving towards him with an unrelenting force.

Unsatisfied with his attacks not working, Trevelyan took off only to realize that the dragon had broken a wing and was only able to go as far as the upper clearing where Corypheus had made himself scarce but his companions were still standing.

Without thinking he went for it but something prevented him from reaching his target. A sharp pain shot through his left shoulder and he lost his balance, only to realize that Corypheus was aiming at his head with a giant red ball of pure arcane energy. He gulped down and as he fell all he could do was to cover his head with his wings.

*

He didn't remember falling or hitting an old wall of the castle. His consciousness only returned to him when Corypheus grabbed his human neck and throw him across the clearing. He could hear Dorian and Cassandra yelling for him while they avoided the dragon attacking them but he couldn't even focus long enough to lift a hand. Yet he tried to transform. It didn't happen and the coldness he felt in the absence of his amulet, raised fear in his gut.

"Using such toys to outplay me?" Corypheus yelled and closed his palm around the amulet, squishing it to bits and pieces. "You should have tried harder to beat a God, faker!"

His body convulsed, pain shooting through his back and blackening his vision. As the bond between the amulet and his own energy was brutally severed, Trevelyan lost his consciousness for a couple of precious seconds. The dull ache in his legs acted up, his body actively protesting to his earlier acts. He tasted iron on his tongue and his fingers twitched on their own accounts. There hadn't been enough time to regenerate his wounds as the dragon and he wasted almost all of his vigour on fighting the dragon and yet that blasted dragon kept on going... it kept on attacking his companions while breathing down energy bolts and Corypheus was still talking about gods and kings.

Trevelyan felt bile raising up in his throat. He couldn't do it, he couldn't just lay on his face and watch his friends get hurt while all he had to do was to transform.

"...No matter. I will kill you both. There is no place for any mistakes in my world." Corypheus yelled at his back.

"Do you ever shut up?" he hissed between his bloody teeth. A heavy foot landed on his lower back making him cry out as it dug into the sensitive skin. His voice got carried over to the battle ground which made Dorian to snap his head in their direction. Trevelyan looked up through heavy eyelashes, unable to see him properly, Dorian stood as nothing more than blur in the distance but he could definitely tell when the mage pointed his staff at them and consecutively rained lightning bolts at Corypheus, causing him to step away from Trevelyan. Dorian then lowered his hands and with a sudden jerk he lifted his staff and Trevelyan could feel the icy breath of the coldness as the ice magic took hold beside him. An effective barrier forming between him and Corypheus.

A spirit barrier appeared around him and he got up on his knees and hands. As a form of red energy started melting the ice, Trevelyan stumbled onto his shaky feet. He had intended to reach out to Dorian but a large claw appeared behind the young mage. His heart skipping a beat and Trevelyan almost screamed out for him to evade to attack but Dorian was quicker; he spun around with a grin, moved forth his fist and a large fireball hit the dragon right on the jaw. As it was distracted by the burning of his wounded eye, Dorian took the opportunity to dash out of the harm's way. He didn't waste a second with throwing a lyrium potion at him either. Trevelyan caught it with great ease and drowned the bottle in one go, his energy rejuvenating steadily.

As brilliant as the rumours said, Dorian was a graceful dancer in the battlefield. Trevelyan never fully grasped the meaning but seeing it from afar and observing as a spectator rather than participating in with the dance had reminded him that the Altus was one of best mages he has ever met; With his never ending supply of magic and his joy as he used his fire based spells. Better than he ever hoped to be but as he watched him dance on the battlefield, throwing fire bolts and putting up barriers for those who needed it, it woke something in him. Trevelyan remembered that there was no such option as failing. The worlds faith stood on their shoulders and none of his companions faltered. They stood with their backs straight and they never once stopped fighting. Not even when a dragon was attempting to kill them.

A dragon that he was meant to kill.

The blood thirst returned in an instant. His magic flowed around him taking a blue hue as opposed to his mark's green glow. His Elvhen markings flared up and the voices whispered to him, guiding his determination and teaching their ways with simple commands.

_Gather and ground your energy. Feel it within your core._

Corypheus broke through the ice in that instant and Trevelyan noticed that almost no time had passed while he was lost in his thoughts. The enemy collected his own force of will as the red bolts appeared above him, ready to hit the mage with all he got. Trevelyan turned to him with eyes and body glowing with an intense blue, earth crackling under his feet.

_Expand your energy. Don't just think like the dragon. Be the dragon. There is more to you than just blood thirst and mayhem._

Trevelyan smirked at his outraged enemy and let his magic spread around, his body following along with it. He wasn't drowning this time. He was becoming something more than what he was, changing and growing. This time when his wings spread out, they didn't hurt. When his claws and limps got bulkier, he welcomed it and with it the feral arcane energy circled around him.

This time the change was all his own. He relished in that knowledge as Corypheus was thrown back with the force of his magic and flap of wings. He dashed forward once more breathing fire and taking the high dragon by surprise. He grasped it, one claw on its jaw and the other on its chest pushing apart in opposite directions.  When the leathery collar was exposed enough for him, Trevelyan bit down hard, clasping his jaw around the dragon's neck. The beast howled, its blood flowing freely and its red lyrium covered body failing to prevent it.

Growling low, he turned to his stunned comrades, fluttering his wings. There was a combination of awe and fear in their eyes which he ignored upon hearing rustling from the sidelines. He didn't stop biting, not even when the dragon fought back and the strong body thrashed below him, claws catching Trevelyan's sides. With a final desperate effort to be free the dragon pulled at him with all its might, rolling them around. The ground beneath them gave way and together both of the dragons tumbled down the castle.

Just before they hit the lower platform, he felt the dragon go slack between his teeth. He released the dead beast, feeling it disintegrate and its dark energy floating around him. Finally completely beat, Trevelyan's body shut down on its own, his human form falling down onto the hard ground.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Corypheus is listed as a Darkspawn/ghoul, is agender and someone who can use blood magic. But more importantly he is closely associated with Leliana in terms of characterization by the writers and he referred to as Leliana's dark mirror. This similarity was meant to show how even faith in extemes can lead to corruption (could it be a possible option for Leliana herself, if she is chosen as the Divine?).


	25. When heavens roar

* * *

 

He screamed. Until there was no breath left in his lungs, Dorian screamed as the dragons toppled over and fall down the shattering ground, an agonizing screech tearing through the night. Strong hands held him back from going after them, barely keeping him contained and stable.

"I must go to him! What if-" he started but Cassandra cut him off with a scowl appearing on her blood covered face.

"Focus on your own duty, Dorian. Trevelyan is doing his part and we must do ours!" She was right of course but he had a nagging feeling of doom as the dragon stayed out of sight. In mere seconds an equally ear splitting shriek was heard. This time it was from their enemy, who had regained his posture before Lavellan could reach him. "He has done it. Corypheus' dragon is dead!" Cassandra exclaimed as the red energy from below gathered up and dispersed, leaving behind an agonized Corypheus.

Not only that Trevelyan's final assault had incapacitated the high dragon but the fluttering of his wings and creating a vast arcane tornado had sent Corypheus flying off and hitting on a sturdy castle wall. As his ready to use energy was gathering within his hands, when he was hit, the pure magic had exploded in on him, lowering his defences immensely.

They made full use of the opening this weakness provided for them. Lavellan dashed forth, flanking him. Cassandra and the Iron Bull swung their swords in every direction and Dorian joined them with twirling his staff, hitting its butt on the ground and creating a pathway of ice to capture Corypheus' feet and slow him down.

They continued with their relentless attacks. He was certain that Trevelyan was alright, probably too lazy to walk all the way up to the top clearing, simply waiting for them downstairs to finish up and join the rest of their companions. They were so close too, Corypheus' breath was hitching and his attacks were becoming more ragged as he constantly jumped between location, teleporting without stopping to rejuvenate his magic. They would win soon and Dorian would rush down the stairs and jump into Trevelyan's awaiting arms. He would wear a scowl asking why it took them so long to come down and claim that he could have done it faster while hugging him close. Cassandra would make disgusted noises behind him, Varric would take notes of their sappy reunion to use in his silly novels  and they would laugh as they celebrate being alive and well. A miracle come true. A dream waiting to happen.

Dorian took a deep breath in, clearing his head of wistful thinking and casted a barrier over the rest of his party. He was about to send out a fiery bolt when Corypheus hauled up an orb, crackling with red energy and released an massive magic, effectively stunning him. His enemy swung down a blow just before them with flames emerging from his attack. Their shields and barriers held up but Dorian was already staggering on his spot. He hoped the rest fared better than he was doing.

Thankfully, they were. Cassandra bashed his chest with her shield when the ancient magister tried to dodge Bull's heavy sword and Lavellan took the opportunity to stab her dagger on his neck. A few arrows, unknown in origin, hit his chest. Corypheus' arms shot upwards and Dorian, standing far enough recognised his preparation for a brutal assault. He restored their barriers just in time as the orb crackled with excessive energy, overloading and releasing a wave of nightmarish pulse. Despite the barriers, they were knocked out of their feet, only Lavellan being able to get up quickly enough to counter the enemy.

His source of power failing, Corypheus yelled at the god's of the old "Not like this! I have walked the halls of the Golden City, crossed the ages..." He tried to futilely stabilise the orb's magic while Lavellan walked behind him, anchor glowing bright and fierce. "Dumat! Ancient Ones! I beseech you! If you exist- If you ever truly existed- aid me now!"

His plead wasn't convicted enough. As Lavellan extended her arm, the orb now tainted with a green energy as well as red, flew out of Corypheus' hand and stopped to hover above Lavellan's open palm. Oh, it could have gone so wrong at that moment. There were so many possibilities and so many ways Lavellan could have used the orb for her gain, corrupting it just as Corypheus once did. She held the infinite power within her grasp but she choose to the right thing instead.

A golden light shot out of the orb and reached the sky, connecting with the breach and draining last of Corypheus' magic along with it. She strode on with knowing steps, hand glimmering with revenge.

"You wanted into the Fade?" she asked wittily and then Corypheus was no more.

He would have loved to celebrate but without the magic to hold the castle in place, the walls started to crumble down, rocks plunging from above and threatening to squash them, making their victory a short lived one. Dorian's eyes searched franticly for the stairs and as he ran towards them, all he could think of was to reach Trevelyan before he lost him to a piece of falling rock.

*

There was a nasty taste lingering in his mouth, a mixture of his own and the beast's blood leaking from his parted lips and the smell of iron and charcoal filling his lungs. Trevelyan coughed. An agonising sound ripped out of his throat and he spit out dead leathery skin, dirtying the front of his armour, crimson colour disappearing on the black fabric.

He was dimly aware that he was lying on the castle grounds, a dissipating dark energy surrounding him. The remnants of the red lyrium dragon were scattering away slowly, leaving away nothing, not even bones but a feeling of dread pooling in Trevelyan's stomach.

The day, or night, he couldn't even tell the difference anymore, was still covered under darkness, only the green light from the breach illuminating the sky. On the platform far above, an occasional red glow shone, spreading like wings and disappearing in seconds. The hovering ground shook occasionally and more pieces of rocks fell down on the edges. He guessed that the fight raged on, with or without him. He lifted his left hand, the only one that he could feel. The anchor was reacting to the large tear, its tingling predominant among his otherwise numb limps.

Purposelessly, his arm fell back down. The rest was up to Lavellan and her trustees, he had done his part, unyielding and until his own muscles gave up on him. He had fought with every fibre in his body, consequences be damned. He had won and now, victorious he rested on the trembling castle.

He was so tired.

He closed his eyes, trying to visualize what this part of the castle was like before it fell into ruins. He imagine it to be a garden, which one could reach following arched gateways and long corridors. An inner garden where colourful flowers and rare herbs grew just like in Skyhold. His illusion shattered there and he wondered then if he would ever see Skyhold again. The only place that ever felt like home. Regardless of which room he had or what people called him, Herald or Inquisitor, it didn't matter. The Ostwick Tower had been a joke and he didn't recall enough of Trevelyan home state from before. The people he considered family weren't there either. He had grown so much in Skyhold and he had become who he was while devising plans with Leliana, taking etiquette lessons from Josephine or even learning to strategise while playing chess with Cullen. He had owed them so much. To all of them, and not just the advisors. He was indebted to them just for showing him what a real home, with a loving and caring family felt like.

Skyhold was the only true home he ever had and maybe, considering the state he was in, the only one he would ever get to have.

A shame really. There was so much more left to do. So many rifts remained opened, people never stopped needing help and now with the battle coming to an end, there would be renovations and rebuilding across the cities; A redistribution of hope was much required. There was still so much more he could do.

Black spots played within his vision as he forced his eyes open. Refusing to give in, his stubborn side flaring once more. He wanted to see Dorian, to touch him, to have him nurse Trevelyan back to health with his expert magic and talented hands while he complained how the Herald was so gifted with getting injured. He wished to hear Dorian call out to him, to hold him, to only be there. He wa-

The earth shook and a tremor passed through his injured back. He gritted his teeth but an agonized cry had already slipped past his lips. Unaware of the footsteps echoing around him, Trevelyan focused on regulating his breathing. He reopened his eyes only to see a familiar figure appearing at the top of the stairs. With an air of nonchalance Solas walked as the noises from above continued on, relentlessly. He tilted his head for a second, listening closely and Trevelyan took the occasion to call out to the elf.

"Solas, oh never mind me. I'm just lying over here... in pain..." he started, not really able to finish the sentence without getting more blood on his shirt. Shame, he had really liked that silk armour.

Solas' head snapped towards him, eyes widening as his gaze took in Trevelyan's poor condition. Whatever was on his mind, it was gone in an instant and as he ran towards the lying man, Trevelyan was touched to see the panic emerging on that naturally stoic face.

He probably should have been more worried about his state in correspondence with Solas' reaction.

"My friend," he started and his concerned frown deepened upon seeing Trevelyan's sheepish smile. "I have observed the battle of the two dragons. When you both vanished from the skies, I had assumed that you had won and reverted back to your human form. I was not expecting to find you so-"

"Happy?" Trevelyan supplied for him "Pleased? I did win after all"

"Broken" Solas deadpanned and Trevelyan winced. He never had any tact, ever... "Here" the elf added and pulled out a red potion from his pouch. He was about to hand over the vial but after considering the Trevelyan's motionlessness, Solas lifted Trevelyan's head instead. As he tipped the bottle over his lips, a warmth spread within Trevelyan, suddenly world starting to make more sense.

An appreciative sound made it out of the mage's mouth as his wounded skin began patching itself. The relief of feeling Solas' fingers below his skull was almost like a blessing. When Solas threw away the vial and took out a second one, Trevelyan was able to hold it on his own.

"Help me sit up?" he asked shortly, not yet trusting his throat. With the elven mage's help he crawled backwards and managed to lean his head above a broken column, his back and shoulders resting more comfortably.

"You have no other wounds that need healing. Why are you not able to get up?" Solas questioned, it was more to himself than to Trevelyan but the man still shrugged in response. "Perhaps, the sudden shift in energy stimulation strained your body, burning of whatever reserves it had with the enforcement of ancient magic. You could be simply over exhausted."

When he tried to answer, a red light, brighter than ever before shone across the sky. A golden beam shot out from above them soon enough and hit the breach, swirling it to closure. The energy in the area shifted, Trevelyan's body reacting to it in an instant, the blue of the elven marking flashing urgently.  

"Or, I am finished with my duty" Trevelyan replied and as his body convulsed with sudden spasms, rendering him breathless for a minute before he could continue  "and Mythal is taking back what she once offered."

"What makes you say that?" Solas asked with both a curious and intrigued voice. Trevelyan smiled gently, observing the sky as the final green glow dissipated. A contentment filled his very being at knowing that the Inquisitor and her team had succeeded in finishing off Corypheus.

"It is finally over" Trevelyan whispered and turned back to Solas "When I asked the ancient ones, why I existed when all others had to perish, they had explained that I was not meant to disappear at that time. That as long as my bond remained attached to them, I was able to control Mythal's power. I was meant to finish what I started no  matter the cost. I was a mistake turned asset. Now, Corypheus is dealt with and the breach is closed, so my duty is done. I no longer have a reason to be."

"Those ancients also said that you were to protect the wisdom of ancients. Your assumption carries no more basis than a misinterpretation of their words"

"Then why do the markings hurt still?" Trevelyan inquired, his voice restrained. "Why do I feel like I am wasting away?"

The elf opened his mouth to  respond but as if it has lost all its magic, the castle started descending down, causing them to levitate ever so slightly. Rocks started breaking apart and falling off the edges, one landing frighteningly close to Trevelyan's unmoving feet. Solas was quick to cast a barrier over them both and he kept them safe by doing so. He leaned over the man while Trevelyan screwed his eyes shut, not wanting to see the oncoming end. But his worries were for anything as whatever stray piece of stone or earth was thrown their way, the strong shield swatted them away, protecting Trevelyan and Solas, both.

Once the tremors stopped, they relaxed and Solas moved away from his position above the Herald whose glow hadn't fainted at all. The concentrated magic around them shifted, pulling something deep within Trevelyan and he had to bite his lips to muffle to the cry in his throat. His markings burned without turning crimson but with the full ferocity of that first time he drank from the Well and everything spiralled downwards...

"What is happening, Solas?" he asked, tired and afraid and so very hurt. His skin was ablaze, his throat dry. He could do nothing but lift a hand and catch Solas by the forearm.

"You are burning inside out" the elf remarked and he genuinely appeared terrified for a second before regaining his composure "It must be because of the breach and the sudden energy shift but I don't understand. If I had more time-"

"Tsion! Solas" a voice ringed through the vast emptiness and both men turned towards the upper stairs to see Dorian, running towards them with a determined face. As he skimmed to a stop by their side, Dorian didn't lose time to cradle Trevelyan's hand and his worried gazed travelled between them. "What is this? What is happening?"

"I don't know yet" Solas admitted with an annoyed glare and Trevelyan felt the palm holding his hand to tighten. He didn't dare look Dorian in the eyes as he swallowed difficultly. "I need to speak with someone, be patient" He said abruptly and left to join with the Inquisitor and the rest of the companions as everyone, one by one began to gather in the middle of the clearing.

Cassandra and the Bull approached them, Cassandra looking stricken but both them reading the grimness of the situation. "Why must I always find you half unconscious, lying inappropriately and out of place?"

 "Half my charm, you see" Trevelyan joked "How else can I leave a half as good impression on you?" Cassandra scoffed but a tiny smile graced her lips. His eyes wondered to the Iron Bull who stood more impassive than he had ever seen him "So, Bull, it turns out my pair of horns are much more impressive than yours. What do you think, hm?" 

"As if borrowed horns could ever beat the real deal. Let's see you use them against me and we'll decide who's the boss, Trev"

"Rain check on that" he answered, casting his eyes downwards where a crusted trail of crimson flowed across his torso and down on to the ground. He had stopped bleeding a while ago but now he felt like his insides were pulling and his marks shone through his armour, a calm blue contrasting the vicious red.

"And the sky is healed, healthy... whole. There's just that left to remember. Yet..." Cole appeared over his shoulder, voice gloomy  instead of stoic as if the words he spoke hurt him physically "yet, the night is covered with a blue tinge. It burns hot in his veins but there is relief beyond the skies. A final farewell is all it would take for the final rest. Is my time in this world up? Am I dying now that the skies has healed?" With the tip of his hat bowed low his hand rested on Trevelyan shoulder, solid and real.

"Amatus?" In response to Dorian's restless voice, Trevelyan ultimately gathered his courage to look up without breaking down completely. What was it that Varric once said in their first meeting? " _The regret of inaction haunts you forever and more_ " He had been right, Trevelyan had to try for Dorian's sake. So he pushed back the pain and focused on Dorian's mesmerizing grey eyes; they were so full of hope and worry that Trevelyan wanted to weep but that wouldn't do...

So he smiled for Dorian. He smiled for all the times they had been together and for all the times they would miss. Just a small, gentle curl of lips was all he could manage but it was enough to convey his love through. His hand squeezed Dorian's even if that was all he could do.

Whatever he saw in Trevelyan's gaze Dorian was unhappy. He shook his head, unbelievably while repeating a single word. "No" he said with an incredulous scowl. "No!"  he exclaimed with a feverish cry. "No..." he wept with tears in his eyes and Trevelyan's heart broke into little pieces. Cole's presence vanished but his warmth lingered on allowing Trevelyan to gather his wits.

"It's going to be alright" the mage replied, his thumb soothing over the soft skin of his hand.

"You always say that" Dorian cupped the side of his face, gently rubbing at his temple, fingers combing through his hair. Their foreheads touched and he inhaled the musky scent, eyes never leaving one and other.

"I've just received this gift from an unknown admirer before we left Skyhold." Dorian said with a tremble in his voice. His hand holding Trevelyan's face disappeared under his armour's collar and he pulled out the Pavus birthright which had been draped over his neck "Was it your doing by any chance?"

"I wouldn't know. Our spymaster is the one dealing with dangerous objects of interest."

"As I thought" the young mage replied with a sad smile and he leaned in, his lips chastely touching Trevelyan. He felt warm blood and ash on his tongue, a taste of death and fire lingered behind as he pulled back with a tired sigh. Despite trying so very hard to continue watching his beloved one, Trevelyan's eyelids soon began to fall. "Don't, Amatus, please don't. Just hold on a bit longer. Whatever Solas has thought of, he should be returning with answers shortly. So just stay with me."

Trevelyan forced himself to awaken, to not to follow the sweet promise of a painless sleep. His body laid limp, his gaze was unfocused and his words slurred but he managed to hoarse out a respond "The saddest goodbyes are the ones you've failed to voice. So allow me to say this my love, for this time it is a goodbye"

"You are mistaking me for another dashing Altus again, Amatus." Dorian interrupted, trying to keep light hearted. It was hard to believe it himself as the tears didn't stop flowing "Nobody here is leaving."

"Dorian" Trevelyan called out, his vision growing darker by the second "I love you. Even if time's pass, you move on and I become no more than a distant memory in your heart, just remember that I love you. Just that is enough."

"No, I refuse it. You will not give up now... Amatus" Dorian stuttered, his head leaning in one last time, sharing the same air. Trevelyan's breathing was slowing down and Dorian felt panic raising in his throat. His shoulders tensed and Dorian could see the exact moment the light began to leave his eyes. Only then he had the courage to whisper with the final breath exchanged between them.

"I love you, too, Amatus"

*

Cole was afraid. The air was filled with eerie silence, with only one man's sobs echoing in the vast clearing. A clearing which once had flowers of every colours and scents of immense sweetness; a garden where carnations of every variation bloomed once, prideful and endearing. Now, the garden smelled of belladonnas, and the night remained as quiet as the dead.

He heard nothing. Nothing but Dorian's silent agony burning as hot as a summer's midday, blinding every other sense, even the Fade itself with its brightness. No one else, not Lavellan's nor Cassandra's or anyone else's voices reached him; all shadowed by the mage's cry.

And that scared him. To listen such hurt and be unable to help, as the limp body on the ground drew his last breath and his markings fainted away like they never existed at all. To hear the cry for help echo in minds more than one but be useless in offering any sort of comfort. His own hurting just as bad, mimicking the whimpers in his heart, crying with injustice of which that has been done and requesting for help that wouldn't come.

Cole had never wanted to forget another moment as badly as he wanted to erase this instant before. For once he regretted ever being human instead of just a spirit; yet he cherished it for he was there with his friends and even if he couldn't make them forget, Cole could still ease their pain. Just as Lavellan and Trevelyan thought him, he could still help.

Different from the way he usually did, Cole reached out with his hands instead of his words to touch the shivering shoulder before him, lifting Dorian's tear stained face away from Trevelyan's chest. He wrapped his arms around the broken man, imitating the action he had seen when Trevelyan had hugged Dorian during their times of distress but the sincerity behind the action remained genuine. Dorian made a surprised noise but readily he accepted the kindness and buried his face into Cole's jacket. Cole felt the ever so slight diminishing sense of dread and loneliness immediately. The other voices returned, tuned down but there, at the edge of his of version of reality.

Then something threatened that balance of voices and an energy ripped through the very fabric of their world. Dorian and the rest of the Inquisition were oblivious to it, but the decrease in temperature was evident to him. The Fade itself opened on a plane different than the one his friends stood on yet its rippling effect reached his ears, tugging at the essence of his very being.

An old woman stood before Trevelyan's body and breathless Cole observed as Trevelyan's spirit, vivid and dazzling, materialized in that plane of existence.

Cole wished Dorian could have seen it.

*

Dying was one of the more displeasing things Trevelyan had done in his all too short life. It was excruciating and depressing. Yet, after the moment he heard Dorian's beautiful words, he didn't mind letting the darkness claim him. The infinite silence finally lulled him into a deep slumber.

He was surprised when he regained some of his senses then. His hearing and sight returned as he took in the pastel colours of the Fade and his magic reached out to the boundless magic within it. He was floating, like the spirit of the Divine, he was hovering above the green grass and below the blue skies both expanding endlessly. This was his afterlife, free of all boundaries and no limitations. He liked it.

Everything felt real, this time around. He didn't have a physical body forcefully entering the Fade but he had integrated with it and he became a part of it. He saw the world as it was. With its yellow, blue and white bolts of energy bundles drifting across, the Fade was as peaceful as he always wanted it to be.

But the illusion was soon shattered as a figure emerged from thin air, shaping itself into a solid and a very real body of the last person Trevelyan ever wanted to see. Standing before him, so out of place with her armour and human flesh, Flemeth was observing his reaction with mild curiosity.

"Seriously?" Trevelyan sneered at the old woman "I died and instead of being embraced in the Maker's bosom or whatever it is that was supposed to happen, I get you?"

"I thought you didn't believe in the Maker" Flemeth laughed, throwing her horned hair back.

"I don't but that's beside the point"

"What is the point then?"

"I am fairly certain, you are not the point. You can't be!" Trevelyan snapped "Hasn't our bond disintegrated since, you know, I died?"

"Death is just the marking for another phase coming to an end in our lives, boy. You need not be upset about it." Trevelyan's spiritual eye twitched. If he had been corporal, he definitely would have sent a fireball or two in Flemeth's direction. "He is right, you know"

"Who is right?" Trevelyan inquired because really, he had nothing to do but float around for an eternity, might as well listen what the old hag had to say.

"That paramour of yours, of course" she said and sighed as if Trevelyan was intentionally being too obtuse just to piss her off. "It is not yet your time to leave them behind"

"In case you haven't notice it, Flemeth, or Mythal, it's a tad bit late for that. I am dead and we are in Fade. How did I die anyway? I had no mortal wounds and what, my heart sort of just stopped?"

"You are not yet dead, silly boy" she laughed heartily, causing hope to flicker to blossom in Trevelyan's chest. He didn't let it show on his face but his ethereal chest heaved with expectation "But whatever gave you the idea that consuming a gallon of dragon blood was good for your mortal, human body?"

"I didn't mean to." He stuttered, embarrassed with the sudden revelations of his own stupidity "I was too busy with biting its head off instead of worrying about what I swallowed."

"Blocking the blood flow, healing the wounds and preventing from poison leaving your body... that silly wolf!" Flemeth contemplated on her own. Trevelyan eyed her carefully. "Anyhow, consider yourself lucky. I didn't come here only to bash you with your daftness."

"You have come to bust me out?" Trevelyan asked with anticipation. He was unable to contain his excited voice any longer "How do you plan to do that when my body is poisoned, again... I have been getting poisoned an awfully lot these few months."

"You are bound to me and as such my magic flows in your veins. You are my charge after all. My marking on your skin are not for show, you know. They have been working to cleanse and heal your blood all the while you have been lamenting on your bitter end. If only you had thought to listen to the voices of the ancients, you would have known."

"That's..." speechless, Trevelyan observed the Fade with a puzzled frown "How am I in the Fade then?"

"You are a mage, are you not? Death is not the only time you get to enter the Fade. Thank your friend that he thought of putting you into a coma like state to keep away the pain as your blood was purified. It's because of your own false assumption that caused you to confuse life and death."

"Oh, Solas... He must have given me a potion to comatose me and you used that weakened state to pull me here"

"Yes, at last the Herald catches up." Flemeth laughed again, enjoying this moment far too much "Your blood should be clean now. Off you go then. Back to your world and to your precious little friends."

Trevelyan felt the tugging of the real world as his limps regained their sensation along with the aches and bruises in his body. His consciousness flickered within both realms and in a split second, his ethereal form had vanished from the Fade leaving behind nothing but a putrid odour in his wake.

"Go on then, silly boy," Flemeth whispered after his departure "If faith is kind to us both, we shall meet again."

*

Cole didn't know how long had passed since he saw Trevelyan's eyes shut close. He didn't know but the stiff back beneath his fingers continued to tremble for far too long after that. So many people were around them now and he saw someone getting ready to reach out to them. Before they could do that, Dorian slowly regained his composure on his own and gave Cole an appreciative smile before the broken man faced Trevelyan once more. Cole wondered if it was time to mention the vision of Mythal and the spirit of Trevelyan he had seen. What if Trevelyan wanted to surprise Dorian once again?

He tilted his head and decided that no, it was too cruel. He reached out a hand and squeezed the young mage's arm.

"Lost but not gone, as opposed to gone but not lost" he murmured. Dorian's face jerked towards him, swollen eyes narrowing dangerously. Cole gulp down soundly and focused on Trevelyan instead. "A divine hand reaches out through the Fade. Guiding and protecting. Leading and embracing. She has shown him the way now all he has to do is to follow the strings back to... _us_ "

"Cole? What are you saying?" asked Lavellan as she approached them.

"You are going to make a bit more sense, kid or this is just too cruel right now" Varric whispered softly and Cole was surprised to hear so many feelings shifting from despair to anger. He hadn't even noticed the existence of the rest of the Companions up until that moment.

He opened his mouth to speak but someone else beat him to it. A sudden flare of blue and a sharp intake of breath scared even him as Trevelyan's chest grew in size while dragging in a much crucial breath. Dorian jumped backwards, falling on Cole.

"What in the Maker's name?"

"You nug humping bastard!"

Varric, Sera and the Iron Bull cursed at varying degrees while Lavellan, Blackwall and Vivienne stood frozen on their spots. It took them a second to start reading their weapons against a potential demon attack. Cassandra on the other hand, approached the man whose eyes were fluttering open and grasped his collar with a harsh motion.

A pained gasp left Trevelyan's grasp but he managed to awaken fully, shoving back at Cassandra's shoulders. When his try was proven to be futile, he sent a crooked smile at her "We really should stop meeting like this"

"It is him." Cassandra grumbled but Trevelyan was sure that he witnessed a dried trail of tears across her cheek. "Thank the Maker" He was going to retort but the hands on his collar was lost and Trevelyan lost his balance in the lack of a support. He didn't fell on the column though, instead soft hands were cradling him close and even in his baffled state he could tell apart the familiar warmth of Dorian surrounding him.

"How on- Maker, what in the Fade's name was that?" Dorian mumbled on, his hands roaming all over Trevelyan's face and torso, feeling and hearing the blood pumping in his veins. The ragged breaths giving him a reason to smile once again.

"You complaining?"

"Maker, no." Dorian bawled and nuzzled his nose into the crook of Trevelyan's neck. "You scared me to death."

"I am sorry, love. I'll explain once we are safely back in Skyhold, I promise" Trevelyan replied and straightened his back, properly sitting up to embrace Dorian. His body protested with a dull ache but it didn't prevent him from raking through the soft locks tenderly, kissing the exposed nape. He sighed deeply as the others began shifting around them, finally letting themselves to marvel in their victory. Smiling and congratulating each other.

"You are alive, I am alive... It's a miracle" Dorian laughed and Trevelyan pulled backwards ever so slightly to capture Dorian's lips with a hard, crushing kiss. Keeping him close, Trevelyan poured his heart into it and was rewarded with the similarly intense response.

"Because of you, Trevelyan" Lavellan started as she sheathed her swords "I sometimes forget which one of us is supposed to be the miracle maker. Now, if you are good enough to ravish your lover, then you are good enough walk back."

"Can you stand up, or do I get to carry you back?" the Iron Bull asked smirking. There was a  joke he was missing but he ignored it for sanity's sake.

"My legs have almost returned back to normal. Just help me up and I'll be good enough to walk." The Iron Bull hauled him up before he even finished his sentence and Trevelyan found purchase on Dorian's shoulder. "Shall we?" Content faces turned to him, nodding and smiling with affection. Blackwall and Vivienne headed the group back to their camp after sending a warm smile towards his way. Dorian helped him walk and when they passed the middle way he heard Varric's curious voice.

"Where is Chuckles?" the dwarf asked as his eyes scanned the area for the elf.

"He was unhappy that I broke the orb so he is probably brooding somewhere." Lavellan said with a shrug. Sera walked over to Trevelyan's side to grab his free arm in the mean time when he and Dorian staggered behind.

"Are you undead, now?" she inquired with a mischievous smile "Because I can think of a few pranks to cheer you up with"

"He is not" Dorian protested as they started walking again after the Iron Bull and Cassandra "And whatever you have planned which involves an undead is not going to happen. Not on this necromancers watch."

"Ah, match made by the Maker" she giggled then "The undead and the necromancer!"

"I am not going to fall to your level of joking, Sera." Dorian huffed, making Trevelyan snicker between them and with a tug at both his friends Trevelyan got them to move forth.

At the very edge of the group, Cole stood with his chin up and a hand on his heart. He radiated an aura of contentment and joy as the group moved onwards with their backs straight and chests puffed.

"What do we do now, Inquisitor?" Cassandra's proud sound reached his ears.

"We go back to Skyhold" was the firm reply which filled Cole with great happiness, making him want to reach out to his friends, give them the bliss they so much deserved.

"Lost but not gone" Cole repeated again with a small smile. "Because they will keep finding you. No more anger. No more resentment. You open your heart to the skies and in return it is protected, not crashed. You are free of your chains now, so fly. _We_ will always be here for you to come back to."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: This has been an adventure to write. Originally, it was meant to be 15-20k story then as always I got carried away. I still plan on following with short stories within the same universe, so it's not even over yet. And I am not sorry ;), though it does explain why the earlier chapters are much shorter than later ones. Two reasons; first is that I wanted to do justice both to the charaters and to the basic concept of alternative worlds. There has been so many ways it could have turned out and more than once I was tempted to finish it with a most heartbreaking touch. (I am sure that would have gotten me an earful :))) Second is that the comments, kudos', and hits I have had gave the story a shine which I took to heart and wanted to reach out to you, give the story more so that it would come to life. I hope I have and I hope I have done it justice.
> 
> Thank you, for reading and I hope it had been an adventure for you just as it had been one for me.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer- I own neither these characters nor Skyhold. All belongs to Bioware.


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